The Four Word Story Game

[Eichhörnchen]

went badly wrong and

[jacobston]

sparked an uninviting expedition

[Eichhörnchen]

to find a replacement

[jacobston]

voice-box for my wife

[Jimbuna]

and her twin sister

[Eichhörnchen]

who wore hers out

[TarJak]

lecturing at the Sorbonne

[Eichhörnchen]

morning, noon and night

[TarJak]

before waking for bed

[Eichhörnchen]

and a hot chocolate

[TarJak]

made by hoons tearing

[BossMark]

the bed sheets while

[TarJak]

driving at 200mph around

[Eichhörnchen]

in ever decreasing circles

[Jimbuna]

until eventually arriving at

[jacobston]

the seemingly bottomless pit

[Jimbuna]

of the rabid kangaroo

[TarJak]

infested sharkpit of doom.

[Eichhörnchen]

I'm tired of this

[Jimbuna]

lack of mutual ridicule

[Eichhörnchen]

so let's get started

[Gerald]

to be serious again

[TarJak]

about making people laugh

[Eichhörnchen]

in the face of

[Jimbuna]

so much unintelligible gibberish

[Eichhörnchen]

and begin by discussing

[Jimbuna]

a few tall tails

[jacobston]

like the story of

[Eichhörnchen]

The Old Empty Barn...

[jacobston]

It wasn't always old

[Eichhörnchen]

It wasn't always empty,

[u crank]

but it was always

[Eichhörnchen]

kind of a barn.

[TarJak]

Triple posting attention whores

[jacobston]

Post three times, love

[TarJak]

attention and seek gratification

[Eichhörnchen]

where ever they can

[Jimbuna]

fool a real sucker

[TarJak]

whose only redeeming feature

[BossMark]

was a broken nose

[Jimbuna]

hair plucked with pliers

[TarJak]

and tougher than wire

[Jimbuna]

from a steel mill

[Eichhörnchen]

on the banks of

[Jimbuna]

H S B C

[Eichhörnchen]

(The Listening Bank) but

[TarJak]

their hearing aid wasn't

[jacobston]

smelly enough to help

[u crank]

solve any crimes. Matlock

[Eichhörnchen]

had strange looking trousers

[u crank]

, a bad driving record

[TarJak]

of hillbilly songs, dirges

[Eichhörnchen]

and old Eurovision stuff

[TarJak]

remixed into Gregorian chants.

[Eichhörnchen]

"It's alive!" cried the

[jacobston]

confectioner, as he grabbed

[TarJak]

his long, thick, throbbing

[Jimbuna]

packet of midget gems

[Eichhörnchen]

and spilled them over

[Jimbuna]

the cabbage patch doll

[Eichhörnchen]

who gobbled them greedily

[Jimbuna]

whilst blowing Gabriels horn

[Eichhörnchen]

and nuzzling his trousers

[Jimbuna]

with a yard brush

[Eichhörnchen]

which led to an

[Jimbuna]

amazing event known as

[TarJak]

The convicted kiddie-fiddlers convention

[jacobston]

taking place in Kalgoorlie

[u crank]

a known hot spot

[TarJak]

for Jimbuna's gyrations. Californication

[Eichhörnchen]

is just one event

[u crank]

in a series of

[TarJak]

stumbling blocks to generating

[u crank]

a reasonably priced bowtie

[TarJak]

rotating mechanism which complied

[u crank]

with local safety regulations

[jacobston]

and reduced the hazard

[TarJak]

of flossing teeth with

[Eichhörnchen]

anything not recommended, like

[TarJak]

silver dory and lobster

[Eichhörnchen]

or, on occasion, mackerel.

[TarJak]

used in fish slapping

[Eichhörnchen]

events the world over.

[Jimbuna]

Whenever one comes across

[TarJak]

as a complete imbecile

[u crank]

silence is golden. Unfortunately

[Eichhörnchen]

I haven't learned this...

[Jimbuna]

nor have many others

[Eichhörnchen]

who beat their gums

[jacobston]

with stale licorice and

[Eichhörnchen]

fill their trousers with

[jacobston]

a very sticky mixture of

[Eichhörnchen]

toffees they'd forgotten about,

[Jimbuna]

over the sands of

[Eichhörnchen]

an interminable, soul destroying

[TarJak]

luncheon of spam and

[Eichhörnchen]

stale, chewy moon pies.

[TarJak]

squirrel droppings and spam

[Eichhörnchen]

fritters, cold toenail soup,

[BossMark]

made by a rather

[Eichhörnchen]

disconsolate Scottish cook, resentful

[Jimbuna]

that his vote won't

[Eichhörnchen]

count one monkey's fart

[Jimbuna]

in a bakewell tart

[nikimcbee]

with Jim's Scottish oatmeal

[Jimbuna]

burning in a red

[Eichhörnchen]

for good measure, when

[Jimbuna]

all is said and

[Eichhörnchen]

done up like a

[Jimbuna]

bat out of hell

[Eichhörnchen]

o, who is there?

[nikimcbee]

Tooooooon! he cried as

[TarJak]

he pulled his trousers

[nikimcbee]

up from a good
:hmmm::o

[TarJak]

spanking and discipline session

[Eichhörnchen]

then rolled the Englishman

[nikimcbee]

over the Scottish boarder

[TarJak]

who's boarding house was

[Eichhörnchen]

actually a bawdy-house

[TarJak]

inhabited by rough types

[u crank]

wearing SubSim t-shirts and

[TarJak]

suspenders and a bra

[Jimbuna]

with matching lacy knickers

[TarJak]

that lumberjacks most prefer

[u crank]

when riding unicorns through

[Eichhörnchen]

fields of livid poppies

[Jimbuna]

and wet cabbage grass

[Eichhörnchen]

in an endless search

[u crank]

for that left-handed toothbrush

[Jimbuna]

who all living souls

[Eichhörnchen]

since the world's beginning

[Jimbuna]

were still looking for

[Eichhörnchen]

so they could use

[jacobston]

two toothbrushes at once

[Eichhörnchen]

(though not whilst riding)

[Jimbuna]

a blind galloping horse

[Eichhörnchen]

or the aforesaid unicorns,

[Jimbuna]

on a haloween evening

[Eichhörnchen]

or any other evening

[jacobston]

but not a tuesday

[u crank]

afternoon. Getting a parade

[Eichhörnchen]

of scantily clad dwarves

[u crank]

isn't that difficult if

[Jimbuna]

your attracted that way

[u crank]

which surprisingly in Australia

[jacobston]

isn't only common, but

[u crank]

a national pastime that

[Eichhörnchen]

eclipses even kangaroo shagging

[Jimbuna]

and sheep prostate examinations

[Eichhörnchen]

when gumboots are employed

[Jimbuna]

to kick drop bears

[Eichhörnchen]

should they interfere with

[Jimbuna]

the price of fish

[Eichhörnchen]

or enjoyment of sheep

[u crank]

shearing. Australians quite often

[Eichhörnchen]

accidentally shear sheep dogs

[u crank]

while under the influence

[Eichhörnchen]

of Triple X brew,

[jacobston]

or while not wearing

[Eichhörnchen]

spectacles prescribed by qualified

[BossMark]

dentist who always try

[Eichhörnchen]

to be helpful, but

[Jimbuna]

but are also short-sighted

[Eichhörnchen]

sheep-worriers, with love

[u crank]

issues and a constant

[Eichhörnchen]

nagging feeling that they

[Jimbuna]

have an irritating rash

[jacobston]

somewhere near their left

[Eichhörnchen]

butt-cheek, but spreading

[Lionclaw]

to the other one

[Eichhörnchen]

then down both legs,

[Jimbuna]

onto the green green

[Eichhörnchen]

grass, grazed by woolly

[Jimbuna]

sheep wearing rubber wellies

[Eichhörnchen]

just yearning for romance.

[Jimbuna]

Gibberish is often confused

[Eichhörnchen]

with pies, according to

[jacobston]

that weird guy under

[Rockstar]

the sea in a

[Eichhörnchen]

book he wrote, entitled:

[Jimbuna]

Living Under The Sea

[Eichhörnchen]

(My Life With Pies),

[jacobston]

published behind a warehouse

[Jimbuna]

opposite the bike shed

[Eichhörnchen]

at Ginsters' Pie Factory

[Jimbuna]

in the winter heartland

[Gerald]

near the north country

[Eichhörnchen]

pie-eating paradise of

[Jimbuna]

deepest darkest Outer Mongolia

[Lionclaw]

, where airag is consumed

Airag = fermented horse milk. :hmmm:

[Eichhörnchen]

to wash down pies

[Gerald]

is enough for most

[Eichhörnchen]

Northern pie-eating fanatics

[Jimbuna]

from the Scottish Highlands

[Eichhörnchen]

who from tomorrow may

[Gerald]

tells the story of

[Eichhörnchen]

independence or continuing slavery

[u crank]

to sniffing unusual plants

[Eichhörnchen]

and gathering magic mushrooms

[jacobston]

to sell to the

[Eichhörnchen]

English, so that they

[jacobston]

can experiment on royal

[Lionclaw]

subjects and their families

[Eichhörnchen]

in order to create

[u crank]

a more photogenic opportunity

[Jimbuna]

for her majesty's corgis

[Eichhörnchen]

to enjoy the limelight

[Jimbuna]

from the gas light

[jacobston]

set ablaze by the

[Eichhörnchen]

Royal Household's fag-lepers

[Jimbuna]

in silk fishnet stockings

[nikimcbee]

,tartan kilt, and orange

[Eichhörnchen]

satin quilted smoking-jackets

[nikimcbee]

with a pink fez

[u crank]

, a dashing figure but

[Eichhörnchen]

a pyro-maniac nonetheless

[Jimbuna]

when taking into consideration

[u crank]

his Nomex boxer shorts

[Eichhörnchen]

but seeing himself in

[Jimbuna]

the mirror was terrifying

[Eichhörnchen]

enough to cause him

[u crank]

momentary loss of his

[jacobston]

hand, which is where

[Eichhörnchen]

he usually kept his

[Jimbuna]

bag of soggy custard

[Eichhörnchen]

which he used for

[Jimbuna]

a type of laxative

[Eichhörnchen]

administered by cakemaking syringe

[jacobston]

into the right ear

[Eichhörnchen]

(of all unlikely places)

[Jimbuna]

that one could imagine

[u crank]

for such a radical

[Eichhörnchen]

treatment for sore "farmers"

[Jimbuna]

ploughing the fields haphazardly

[Eichhörnchen]

with their trousers chafing

[Jimbuna]

all the wrong bits

[Eichhörnchen]

and making their eyes

[Jimbuna]

pop out in amazement

[Eichhörnchen]

at the price of

[Jimbuna]

a bag of manure

[Eichhörnchen]

while surrounded by it.

[Jimbuna]

Some people might say

[Eichhörnchen]

"I'm not eating this!"

[Jimbuna]

"I don't like it"

[Eichhörnchen]

"It'll do you good!"

[jacobston]

or "eww", but those


OT:
:06: :har:, my email notification for this thread showed up in my spam folder... :damn:

[Eichhörnchen]

snails we refused to

[Jimbuna]

allow on our roses

[Eichhörnchen]

THEY might taste good...

[Jimbuna]

or they may not