The Five Word Story Game

[Jimbuna]

always a joy to perform

[Reece]

Swanny almost passed out until

[Jimbuna]

Jim took mercy on him

[Reece]

and mercifully put him down :o:doh:

[Jimbuna]

one of the dirty toilets

[Aktungbby]

where he was'nt so hoity-toity

[Reece]

Aktung tripped and fell in!! :o:oops:

[Jimbuna]

the horrible brown smelly mess

[Reece]

covered both Aktung and Swanny :Kaleun_Sick:

[Jimbuna]

oh what a glorious sight

[Reece]

Jim and I cheered and

[blackswan40]

Hosed them with cold water :eek:

[Reece]

they both bent over expecting

[blackswan40]

The lash got a brazilian

[Jimbuna]

the other went even further

[Reece]

and dropped his pants expecting

[Aktungbby]

great gobs of gluteus maximus:yep:

[Reece]

and received it by gum!! :o

[blackswan40]

Finger licking good like KFC :timeout: :Kaleun_Sick::timeout:

[Jimbuna]

a bit like cheesy chips

[Reece]

that are 20 years old :oops:

[Jimbuna]

the aroma was too much

[blackswan40]

The sewer rats feasted Jim

[Jimbuna]

continued eating his vindaloo curry

[Reece]

breathing fire on the rats :Kaleun_Applaud:

[Jimbuna]

and turning them into toasties

[Reece]

Mmm Yum, Aktungbby tucked in!! :k_confused:

[Jimbuna]

whilst they were still hot

[Aktungbby]

to trot into his gizzard

[Jimbuna]

in his time of crisis

[Aktungbby]

of an acute diverticular nature:oops:

[Reece]

he underwent an operation that

[blackswan40]

Widened his cake hole Jim

[nikimcbee]

wore the finest pink kilt

[Reece]

on his date with Aktung!! :Kaleun_Sick:

[Jimbuna]

soon everything went terribly wrong

[Reece]

jealous Swanny grabbed Aktung and

[Jimbuna]

led him to his hideout

[blackswan40]

handcuffed aktung to swanny's bed

[Aktungbby]

on all-fours for greater convenience:o

[Jimbuna]

for all the kings men

[blackswan40]

Playing pin tail on donkey :doh::timeout: :doh:

[Jimbuna]

making an ass of himself

[Aktungbby]

braying for 'piece and quiet'

[Jimbuna]

and a half baked carrot

[Reece]

this is too much guys!! :har::har:

[Jimbuna]

Cometh the hour, cometh the

[blackswan40]

Grand Mufti of enlightenment Aktungbby

[Reece]

he took a bow but

[Jimbuna]

couldn't bend his crippled knee

[blackswan40]

squirt it with WD40 Jim

[Jimbuna]

I doubt that would work

[Reece]

so Jim smothered it with

[Aktungbby]

honey, canola and sesame seed

[Reece]

blowflies were attracted laying maggots!! :oops::doh:

[Aktungbby]

which ate the gangrenous flesh

[Reece]

exposing raw flesh for blowflies!! http://www.sherv.net/cm/emoticons/sick/barfing.gif

[blackswan40]

Swanny arrived with a hacksaw

[Reece]

that made matters worse, so

[Jimbuna]

he hatched another cunning plan

[Reece]

but is that really possible? :hmmm:

[Jimbuna]

only if you believe it

[Aktungbby]

and are a cunning linguist:haha:

[blackswan40]

With a big bang stick

[Jimbuna]

and a grey shaggy beard

[blackswan40]

if your an outdoorsy type

[Aktungbby]

then it'd be a sasquatch

[Reece]

suddeny Aktungbby belched so loud :o

[Jimbuna]

the liberty bell rang out

[blackswan40]

Made swanny think its Sunday

[Aktungbby]

suckin' down the communion vino

[Jimbuna]

from the priests secret stash

[Aktungbby]

in his goat-hair celice's pocket

[Reece]

the priest caught him and

[Aktungbby]

chastised with his bishops crosier

[Reece]

Swanny was actually enjoying it!! :oops::88):yep:

[Aktungbby]

admitting heinous deeds in confession

[Reece]

the priest was shocked, he

[Jimbuna]

sent for the Mother Superior

[blackswan40]

She arrived in stockings and

[Jimbuna]

a bright pink bunny suit

[Reece]

Swanny thinking it's Easter bunny!! :o

[Jimbuna]

tried banging his fist against

[Aktungbby]

her padlocked conventional chastity belt https://thumbs.dreamstime.com/b/medieval-iron-chastity-belt-close-up-replica-historical-festival-battle-neva-territory-peter-paul-fortress-77222239.jpg:timeout:

[Jimbuna]

causing multiple broken knuckle joints

[Aktungbby]

interfering with nerd nose picking

[Reece]

causing Aktung to bleed profusely :doh::oops:

[Jimbuna]

from an extremely private place

[Reece]

Swanny kissed it better though!! :yep:

[blackswan40]

then got mistaken for Vampire

[Reece]

Aktungbby screamed but then decided

[Aktungbby]

venting his odiously noxious wrath :Kaleun_Sick:

[Reece]

on poor Jim standing nearby :o:oops:

[Jimbuna]

taking aim with his rifle

[Reece]

Jim shot his butt!!! :Kaleun_Applaud: Aktungbby

[Jimbuna]

collapsed into the mud bath

[Reece]

Bubbles oozed to the surface

[blackswan40]

Aktung shot out of Blowhole

[Reece]

a horrible brown missile that

[Jimbuna]

blocked out all the daylight

[blackswan40]

Jims prize roses wilted and

[Jimbuna]

threatened to move next door

[Reece]

especially since Swanny picked them :o:k_confused:

[Jimbuna]

for his forthcoming civil partnership

[Aktungbby]

with some willing distaff-sheets bugger:oops: English expression: "from the distaff side of sheets"ie: a bastard :O:

[Jimbuna]

he met the day before

[Aktungbby]

on the maean streets of 'Frisco

[Jimbuna]

where only the lawless wander

[Reece]

Lawman Jim caught Aktungbby stealing

[Jimbuna]

womens pink and frilly knickers

[Reece]

Jim kept the linen then

[Jimbuna]

sold it at the market

[blackswan40]

swanny needed elastic for catapult

[Jimbuna]

for his human cannonball act

[Reece]

he pulled the firing lever

[Commander Wallace]

But shredded paper came out.

[Reece]

Swanny lost his temper and

[Jimbuna]

spat his plastic dummy out

[Reece]

hitting his dad aktung in

[Jimbuna]

the cot next door cried

[Reece]

boohoo I want my mummy!! :88):wah:

[Jimbuna]

the one wrapped in bandages?

[Aktungbby]

a'tuttling 'neath his death mask:dead::/\\!!

[Jimbuna]

as the scarab beetles nibbled

[Aktungbby]

his severed testicles coptic-jar contents

[Jimbuna]

hidden down his trouser leg

[Aktungbby]

in his rugby shorts pocket

[Reece]

Putin (aka Poo-tin) appeared on the scene :o

[Jimbuna]

turning everyone into a rage

[Reece]

Suddenly a flying poo hit

[blackswan40]

Putin in his Novgorods ouch:timeout: :doh::timeout:

[Jimbuna]

another one bites the dust

[Reece]

He looked for sympathy but

[blackswan40]

in dictionary sh!t sympathy syphilis

[Reece]

he started to scratch it

[Jimbuna]

then it suddenly fell off

[Reece]

a dog snatched it up :o:oops:

[Jimbuna]

running away with it to

[Aktungbby]

his tail-wagging chewy wiener snack

[Jimbuna]

was just a tiny bone

[Aktungbby]

that stuck in his craw

[Jimbuna]

causing him to nearly choke

[Aktungbby]

switching his barks to yelps

[Reece]

Putin's voice was now squeeky :yep:

[Jimbuna]

like a freshly hatched chicken

[Reece]

his hand became limp, Aktungbby

[Jimbuna]

always had a limp wrist

[Reece]

so Putin dated Aktung, they

[Jimbuna]

are a well matched couple

[Reece]

the two were caught in

[Jimbuna]

a state of total disarray

[Aktungbby]

wearing each others soiled togas

[Jimbuna]

as well as fishnet stockings

[Reece]

the stink was overpowering,:oops: Jim

[Jimbuna]

had to evacuate the area

[Reece]

police surrounded the house and

[Jimbuna]

called in the secret service

[Reece]

the house was fumigated then

[Jimbuna]

sold to the highest bidder

[Reece]

Swanny won at $750,000, we

[Jimbuna]

simply couldn't understand his naivety

[blackswan40]

Swanny knows about the nativity (the three wise men bearing gifts gold frankie goes to hollywood and olly murs) :doh: :/\\!! :doh: :hmmm:

[Aktungbby]

With porked-out Aktung in styhttps://thepawreport.files.wordpress.com/2013/12/1491316_10202246085850056_1724200326_o.jpg

[Jimbuna]

making a pig of himself

[Reece]

Nothing unusual there! :k_confused:Jim tried

[Jimbuna]

putting him on a diet

[Aktungbby]

confusing him: GOLO ain't "crashdive"!::hmmm::doh: :k_confused:

[Jimbuna]

well, whatever that lot means

[Reece]

a straight jacket for Aktung!! :Kaleun_Thumbs_Up:

[Jimbuna]

and an ice cold shower

[Reece]

Now his passions have cooled

[Jimbuna]

to a record low temperature

[Aktungbby]

fortunately, Minnesota boys are frigid!:D

[Jimbuna]

but not as much as

[Reece]

Aktung himself, he's a regular

[Jimbuna]

attendee of the local asylum

[Aktungbby]

thus according wife's separate vacation:yep::yeah:

[Jimbuna]

to a faraway desert island

[Aktungbby]

that she calls Rapture Nui:03:

[Jimbuna]

but quite often known as

[Reece]

"Bliss Haven", free from Aktungbby!! :Kaleun_Applaud:

[Jimbuna]

and all his motley crew

[blackswan40]

Swanny Reece and other nomads

[Jimbuna]

hung around the local brothels

[Aktungbby]

getting prechecked for client scrofulousness:arrgh!:

[Jimbuna]

can be a serious matter

[blackswan40]

all inmates no brain matter

[Jimbuna]

and a bottle of sauce

[Reece]

was given to Jim, he

[Aktungbby]

cried aloud ecstatically"praise be!"

[Reece]

but whoops!! the bottle dropped

[Aktungbby]

into the bottomless perdition pit

[Reece]

where it landed on Swanny's

[Jimbuna]

bald head causing severe pain

[Reece]

he called to Jim but

[blackswan40]

he didnt hear swannys whimper

[Jimbuna]

listening instead to the orchestra

[Aktungbby]

of strungout heavenly hosts ahummin'

[Jimbuna]

like a choir of angels

[blackswan40]

Hells angels of deathmetal Jim

[Jimbuna]

were popular at the blacksmiths

[blackswan40]

Blacksmiths Arms Aktungs watering hole

[Reece]

the stuff they served stank

[Jimbuna]

like no smell experienced before

[Aktungbby]

'twas Mother of all Smells

[Jimbuna]

and the Father of none

[blackswan40]

Meanwhile at the asylum Jim

[Reece]

dropped a beauty, Swanny heaved

[Aktungbby]

ho'd, screamed, bellowed, and whimpered

[blackswan40]

swanny staggered out gasping air

[Jimbuna]

and pleading for some water

[Reece]

Jim just stood there grinning!! :D

[Jimbuna]

then opening yet another tinny

[Cyborg322]

sounding 60's portable tranny radio

[Reece]

cool, his hair grew back!! :cool::smug:

[Aktungbby]

restoring him to Yeti-like hirsutness

[Reece]

he looked in the mirror

[Jimbuna]

forcing it to shatter suddenly

[Reece]

Jim blamed Swanny for this

[Jimbuna]

putting him in the brig

[Reece]

putting him in the brig

he bribed Aktungbby the guard

[Jimbuna]

using a stolen credit card

[Aktungbby]

and box of Ghirardeli truffles

[Jimbuna]

for his bride to be

[Reece]

however she dumped Aktung.

*News Flash* Putin

[Jimbuna]

much preferring old man Reece

[Reece]

and Jim to execute him, :up:

[Jimbuna]

Swanny said "I'll do it"

[blackswan40]

Swanny pulled the lever and

[Jimbuna]

then it all started happening

[Reece]

first his neck stretched then

[Jimbuna]

both his ears fell off

[Reece]

Aktungbby cooked them up then

[Jimbuna]

fed them both to Reece

[Reece]

for his cat :yep: Jim drooled

[blackswan40]

Jim wanted a cat also

[Reece]

so he purchased a nice

[Jimbuna]

tiger from the local zoo

[Reece]

that ate Aktung for breakfast :o

[Aktungbby]

brightly burning in the night:Kaleun_Salivating:(with apology to William Blake's 'Tygher Tygher Burning Bright' poem)

[Jimbuna]

oh what a heavenly sight

[Reece]

Jim roasted popcorn with Reece!! :up:

[Jimbuna]

before the flames went out

[Reece]

a glass of wine followed :yep:

[Jimbuna]

then a big fat cigar

[Reece]

seated on our deck chairs

[Jimbuna]

up on the poop deck

[Aktungbby]

commodiously situated with Nelson's Blood apârìtïfs :Kaleun_Cheers:

[Jimbuna]

in excess of five words

[Aktungbby]

I considered: Nelson's Blood a brand name!