The Five Word Story Game

[Jimbuna]

when does the party start

[Reece]

Whoops!! Nappy needed for Larry!! :oops::doh:

[Jimbuna]

never say never to children

[Reece]

or you'll get a nice

[Jimbuna]

beating of an irate parent

[Reece]

or tongue poke from child. :yep:

[Jimbuna]

will suffice equally as well

[Reece]

One summers day Aktungbby decided

[Jimbuna]

that he was actually transgender

[Aktungbby]

...tossing away his Viagra tablets:yeah:

[Jimbuna]

was something he'd never consider

[Reece]

traded them for a vibrator!! :o:oops::03::D

[Jimbuna]

but a nuclear powered one

[Reece]

OH NO!!! :o Core meltdown, Aktungbby

[Jimbuna]

was now getting rather excited

[Reece]

naturally a small explosion erupted!! :oops::oops::doh:

[Jimbuna]

in the seat of his

[Reece]

goggomobil dart, it was a

[Jimbuna]

right sight for sore eyes

[Reece]

caused by the disgusting stench!! :oops:

[Jimbuna]

Reece left in his wake

[Aktungbby]

as Winkin Blinkin and Nod winced

[Jimbuna]

thinking of Aktungs imminent arrival

[Aktungbby]

...like unto a second coming :arrgh!::rock::hmph::yeah:

[Reece]

Jim cried out oh no!! :wah:

[Jimbuna]

time for a swift exit

[Reece]

Aktungbby chased after Jim but

[Jimbuna]

he tripped and fell over

[Reece]

a rotting sheep carcass!! Phew!! :k_confused:

[Jimbuna]

luckily it wasn't a bull

[Reece]

luckily it wasn't a bull
Aktungbby went home to have

[Jimbuna]

a drink of moms milk

[Aktungbby]

...falling off Mammaries Anonymous wagon:Kaleun_Cheers::()1:

[Jimbuna]

straight into a cow pat

[Aktungbby]

cow pat- -tern of pure Bovine Scatology

[Reece]

he swallowed the pat juice :oops::doh:

[Jimbuna]

without even spilling a drop

[Aktungbby]

and promptly mooowed the lawn:shucks:

[Jimbuna]

with a pair of scissors

[blackswan40]

of the rusted shut variety

[Reece]

unimpressed Jim kicked his butt!! :mad:

[blackswan40]

Swanny said foreplay nice Jim :yep:

[Aktungbby]

foreplay nice but Jim prefers aftplay nice:woot::/\\k:

[Reece]

With aktung naturally, later Jim

[blackswan40]

After eight witching hour Jim :yep:

[Reece]

After eight witching hour Jim :yep:

caught Swanny picking his nose!! :o:oops::doh:

[Jimbuna]

with a pair of pliers

[Aktungbby]

for those nasally grippng moments

[blackswan40]

Of nostril hair removal ouch

[Jimbuna]

best to burn them out

[blackswan40]

Will i loose my eyebrows :D

[Aktungbby]

you're lowbrow to begin with:D:doh::timeout:

[Reece]

then spreads to the head :o

[Jimbuna]

where their is limited functionality

[Aktungbby]

where their is limited functionality...particularly in the spelling department:hmmm:

[Reece]

Jim went back to school

[blackswan40]

As the headmaster with cane

[Reece]

Whipping Aktungs butt once again!! :doh::oops:

[Jimbuna]

a sight for sore eyes

[Aktungbby]

...my gluteus maximii were minimii :oops::wah::shucks:

[blackswan40]

Aktungby was always teachers pet :yep:

[Aktungbby]

In fact, I invented pet-therapy!:yeah: :rock::roll::hmph::woot:

[blackswan40]

In Wales wearing wellies Jim :arrgh!:

[Reece]

that sounds a little kinky!! :oops::oops::timeout:

[Jimbuna]

well only you would know

[Aktungbby]

...kinky wellies being downright rubbery

[Jimbuna]

rising to the next level

[Reece]

when Jim grabbed his rubber

[blackswan40]

Dont forget k~y jelly Jim :yep::D:yep:

[Reece]

he uses a special brand

[Jimbuna]

one only known to himself

[Reece]

Swanny tried to probe Jim

[Jimbuna]

who took him to ground

[blackswan40]

With a Geordie ecky thump :yep:

[Jimbuna]

swiftly putting bracelets on him

[blackswan40]

Taken back to his old cell :yep:

[Jimbuna]

never to be seen again

[blackswan40]

Until joining the breakfast queue :yep:

[Reece]

a big bruiser approached Swanny

[blackswan40]

Thought his time had come :o:timeout: :o

[Reece]

he winked at Swanny smiling

[Jimbuna]

and offered him his hand

[Reece]

Swanny took it, they walked

[Jimbuna]

down to the wild side

[Reece]

He puckered up his lips :o:oops::oops:

[Jimbuna]

before letting his hair down

[blackswan40]

Then the breakfast bell rang

[Jimbuna]

all heads in the trough

[Reece]

Swanny's was the first - SLURP!!:oops::o

[Aktungbby]

"slopping the troops" fer sure

[Reece]

"slopping the troops" fer sure

what ever that means :doh:
Meanwhile

[Jimbuna]

down at the garden party

[Reece]

Aktungbby tripped over his tongue!! :o:yep:

[Jimbuna]

into a pan of stew

[Reece]

that was boiling, his screamed :oops::wah:

[Aktungbby]

"my gal, Connie Lingus'll be pissed!":k_confused::oops::wah:

[Jimbuna]

or could be annoyed even

[Aktungbby]

:timeout:..."getting her Irish up" even:oops: :dead:

[Jimbuna]

I doubt we'll ever know

[Aktungbby]

...truely fearsome when she's swashbuckling!:oops::dead:https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-FGKMtBUnS40/UC8OwXUmfBI/AAAAAAAAHqc/Yli3SMmVlxY/s1600/maureenoharaatswordspoint.jpg

[Jimbuna]

with a childs plastic sword

[Aktungbby]

PLASTIC!?? :timeout:...curses! I'm foiled again!:arrgh!:

[Jimbuna]

not for the first time

[blackswan40]

Aktungbby listened to Bing Crosby

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDN8I7neqUA

[Aktungbby]

who died after putting balls

[blackswan40]

That rebounded off the fence :yep::oops::yep:

[Aktungbby]

who was handling stolen items

[Reece]

taken to Aktungbby to fence! :k_confused:

[blackswan40]

But got fleeced again Jim

[Reece]

had him flogged then locked

[Jimbuna]

up in his dog kennel

[Reece]

he wined like a dog!! :oops::oops:

[Jimbuna]

whilst repeatedly cocking his leg

[Reece]

Jim couldn't bear the sight

[Jimbuna]

of seeing Reece getting excited

[Reece]

about Jim's misfortune so he

[Jimbuna]

put Reece in the kennel

[Reece]

with Jim, lucky Reece escaped!! :Kaleun_Applaud:

[Jimbuna]

but was shot on sight

[Aktungbby]

enduring a dog day afternoon

[Jimbuna]

in the realm of darkness

[blackswan40]

Tenbob for the meter anyone :D

[Jimbuna]

got change of a tanner

[Reece]

obviously Jim's hide was tanned!! :oops::doh:

[blackswan40]

Yikes with Mackem red stripes :D

[Reece]

OW!! That's got to smart!! :oops::oops:

[Jimbuna]

not really, tanner is sixpence

[blackswan40]

Beer sixpack better when parched :()1:

[Reece]

but I hate beer Swanny!! http://www.sherv.net/cm/emoticons/sick/barfing.gif

[blackswan40]

Put the kettle on Jim :yep:

[Reece]

Mmm, a nice cuppa coffee!! :up::D

[Jimbuna]

I'll stick to my rum

[Aktungbby]

Pussers can be very sticky:arrgh!:

[Jimbuna]

more so with peppermint cordial

[Reece]

Meanwhile Reece decided to take

[Aktungbby]

the high road to china

[Reece]

on a secret mission to

[Aktungbby]

on a secret mission toBeijing, Hong Kong, and Shanghai:x

[Reece]

Aktung joined me later, we

[Aktungbby]

wore Rolexes and drove Aston Martins:yeah:

[Reece]

the Chinese were furious and

[Jimbuna]

copied them at half price

[Reece]

but we had genuine stuff!! :up:

[Jimbuna]

or so they both thought

[Aktungbby]

our eyes becoming quite slitty:x

[Jimbuna]

better quite slitty than slanty

[Aktungbby]

...with apologies to Prince Philip:haha:

[Reece]

lunch time, flied lice anyone :D

[Aktungbby]

with apology to Fu Manchew:D

[Reece]

we took an ocean cruise :Kaleun_Applaud:

[blackswan40]

Pussers rum in minibar Jim :yeah:

[Jimbuna]

that'll do nicely for me

[Reece]

the ship struck an iceberg :k_confused:

[Jimbuna]

and the band commenced playing

[Reece]

Reece & Aktungbby jumped overboard :oops::doh:

[Jimbuna]

into the shark infested water

[Reece]

quickly climbed into life boat! :O:

[Jimbuna]

which quickly foundered and sank

[Reece]

Reece swam to shore though!! :salute:

[Jimbuna]

to find the beach mined

[blackswan40]

With German beach towels Jim

[Jimbuna]

manned the machine gun nest

[Aktungbby]

with a Spandau from Budapest

[blackswan40]

Dancing in clogs bloody pests

[Reece]

Rambo Reece fired his weapon :Kaleun_Salivating:

[Jimbuna]

and stained his trouser leg

[Reece]

didn't know it was loaded!! :oops::oops::doh::oops::oops:

[Jimbuna]

not surprised at your age :)

[Reece]

thankfully Aktungbby cleaned it up!! :salute:

[Jimbuna]

using a high pressure washer

[Aktungbby]

with lysol and windex spray

[Reece]

Finally all settled down, Jim

[Jimbuna]

hung Reece from a tree

[Reece]

that's not very nice Jim!! :o:wah:

[Jimbuna]

you're the latest drop bear :)

[Reece]

Aktungbby gave Jim a spanking!! :yeah:

[Jimbuna]

before literally turning on Reece

[Reece]

for a cuddle, Jim sobbed!! :yep:

[Jimbuna]

and Reece wet his pants

[Reece]

with water whilst spraying Jim!! :O:

[Jimbuna]

never saw that one coming

[Aktungbby]

instead of coming, he went

[blackswan40]

Off on a proper wobbler

[Jimbuna]

down at the ferry landing

[Reece]

ending up in a pile

[Jimbuna]

like a sack of crap

[Reece]

One day Putin asked Swanny

[Jimbuna]

come look out my balcony

[Reece]

it was a really huge

[Jimbuna]

balcony with a long drop

[Aktungbby]

for accidental interfaces with destiny

[Jimbuna]

a sight for sore eyes

[Aktungbby]

:hmmm:...and sore everthing else too:O::oops::timeout::dead:

[Reece]

the smell was so bad :k_confused:

[blackswan40]

Dice onions absorbs stinky fumes

[Reece]

Dice onions absorbs stinky fumes

just burn your eyes out!

[Aktungbby]

:Kaleun_Crying:....especially in the wet-prep room https://media.bizj.us/view/img/11695158/downloaded-07132020-olam-spices-garlic-and-onion-processing-facility-in-gilroy.jpg<Gilroy CA onion & garlic dehydration plant where I spent two miserable dusty college summers('70-71)working for daddy unloading crop trucks;https://thumbs.dreamstime.com/b/trailer-white-onions-harvest-time-badajoz-spain-97907620.jpg every onion is then hand-placed on a spike-belt for processing and dehydration in the preproomhttps://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/shopping?q=tbn:ANd9GcTyRGt93l67kPhwGLStGtdNZ4S650l v8ylJBxGz2oxgbRFrtT3ACarpIUkRFc2qVssowKpKTxQ_ux1vr Tr5pZVp02Eh8ejBZ-vkPKj9p10Fa3reV_ZL1joYNMQcI3Ho6g9Va2-SmWsVnBQ&usqp=CAc

[Reece]

Jim laughed at us all. :o:-?

[Jimbuna]

and poured himself another rum

[Reece]

Aktungbby was not amused so

[Jimbuna]

started divorce proceedings from Reece

[Aktungbby]

...thank the Lord for prenups!:arrgh!:

[Jimbuna]

hope you've a good lawyer

[Aktungbby]

My wife's an ex-divorce attorney:yeah: Even the damn inlaws are amazed at my lasting 43 years!??:timeout:

[Jimbuna]

sounds like you're knackered then :)

[Aktungbby]

if not a little pale:o:O: https://img-s-msn-com.akamaized.net/tenant/amp/entityid/BB1ooY0X.img?w=800&h=435&q=60&m=2&f=jpgIf you pay close attention while watching Das Boot, then you'll notice that the actors appear incredibly pale. While the majority of productions would have achieved this look with make-up, that wasn't the case for the 1981 film. To give the appearance the actors had actually spent time living in a U-boat, they were kept inside as much as possible, away from the sun. http://www.subsim.com/404n.jpg Knackered indeed!:oops: :dead:

[Reece]

Jim woke from his nightmare :k_confused::Kaleun_Sick:

[Aktungbby]

rolled over...resuming 'Sweetdreams BBY':Kaleun_Sleep:

[Reece]

Dreamed of Swanny, he smiled :o:oops::yep:

[Jimbuna]

knowing that Swanny loved Reece

[Reece]

knowing that Swanny loved Reece
as much as Jim. :oops::03:
Aktungbby . . .

[Jimbuna]

joined them in a threesome

[Reece]

yes, the new three stooges :D

[Jimbuna]

without a laugh between them

[Reece]

Jim (aka Curly Joe) dropped his

[Rockstar]

dentures in a toilet filled

[Reece]

with puke, he bent over

[Rockstar]

with puke, he bent over

and began bobbing for apples

[Reece]

Jim got a bite!! He (I think Jim's gonna get revenge for this.)

[Jimbuna]

you bet your sorry life

[Reece]

I beg forgiveness Jim! :oops: . . . Nah!! :D

[Jimbuna]

right, off with his head

[Reece]

it rolled down the street

[Jimbuna]

and under a passing bus

[Reece]

straight through into a paddock :o:oops:

[Aktungbby]

slipping on a dead haddock

[Jimbuna]

and landing in the batter

[Aktungbby]

wondering: "what is the matter"?!!:timeout:

[Reece]

all in all - it stinks!! :doh::oops::yep:

[Jimbuna]

up to the high heavens

[Reece]

Aktungbby sniffed the air saying . . .

[Jimbuna]

"Oh what a pleasant delight"

[Aktungbby]

as he inhaled some upsydaisium!

[Jimbuna]

and felt his bowels rumbling

[Aktungbby]

but thought 'twas cat purring:timeout:

[Jimbuna]

more like a cat hissing

[Aktungbby]

when not missed catbox pissyfit :oops:

[Reece]

Aktungbby didn't make the toilet!! :k_confused:

[Aktungbby]

that'$ 'cau$e Aktung make$ $hekel$:yeah::arrgh!::rock::hmph:

[Reece]

Jim jailed him for exposure!! :o:oops:

[Jimbuna]

the judge gave him life

[Reece]

Aktungbby cried . . . Let Me out!! :wah:

[Jimbuna]

I'm afraid of the dark

[Reece]

something hairy clutched his shoulder!! :oops::o:eek:

[Jimbuna]

and passed him some soap

[Reece]

he dropped it, bent over

[Jimbuna]

and felt a very sharp

[Reece]

set of teeth biting his

[Jimbuna]

soft and cuddly pink bottom

[Reece]

Aktungbby smiled saying . . . OH YEH!! :oops::doh: