Ask the next Person a Question

[TarJak]

Me.

Who's been the meanest to you in life?

[Tango589]

Me.

Were Sister Sledge really sisters?

[Jimbuna]

Rumour has it they were cousins.

Can you do the can can?

[BossMark]

Well I can certainly open and drink a can or 4


How about you?

[Jimbuna]

Four is hardly worth the effort...try starting at eight and move upwards in number.

Will it ever come to pass?

[TarJak]

Eventually. Keep sitting on the potty and wait.

Who made it happen?

[Jimbuna]

The most likely suspect is you unfortunately.

Will the lunch at Sunderland be hot when it arrives today?

[Cybermat47]

.

Will the lunch at Sunderland be hot when it arrives today?

No, as you will order bread.

Do I have enough time to type this and post it before my iPad's battery runs out?

[Jimbuna]

Obviously...looking at the sentence.

Can we understand the obvious?

[TarJak]

Only if it's spelled out for you.

If the obvious is so, why do so many not see it?

[Jimbuna]

Like so many others, they are blind to the obvious.

Which is the tastiest dinosaur?

[Tango589]

A Bernard Metthews turkey dinosaur.

What time should I knock off work today?

[TarJak]

Not until the pub opens.

Does the UK not have 24hr licensing yet?

[STEED]

Yes we do, you can get pissed at any time.

Have done a jackson Pollock on the pavement?

[Jimbuna]

Are you a drip then?

How many boyfriends or girlfriends have you had?

[Tango589]

One girlfriend, now wife.
No boyfriends, unless you count that one evening in Bangkok. :o

Do you have any phobias?

[vienna]

No, I have a fear of phobias...

What was that sound?....


<O>

[Jimbuna]

I heard nothing.

Did you hear anything?

[Tango589]

It was the sound of one hand clapping.

Should I have another beer?

[Jimbuna]

Too late, I've grabbed it.

Time for another later on?

[Tango589]

Nah, time for wine.

Red or white?

[Jimbuna]

Both, I'm thirsty.

Why does it always happen to me?

[Tango589]

Because it stops it happeng to me.

Whats the oddest thing you've had for breakfast?

[Jimbuna]

The eye of a tiger.

How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?

[u crank]

Then you would be as old as you think you are.

How old do you have to be?

[Tango589]

Old enough to know better, young enough to still get away with it.

What's a good cure for an attack of the vapours?

[Jimbuna]

A bottle of rum.

Which form of public transport do you prefer?

[TarJak]

Trains.

If a ship shipping ship is shipping shipping ships does that make it a shipping ship shipping ship?

[Madox58]

It's still a cargo ship as no matter what is on board? It's Cargo!

Did I really just say that?

[Jimbuna]

I guess so.

What is your favourite smell?

[Armistead]

I guess so.

What is your favourite smell?


fresh baked bread


what's yours?

[TarJak]

1998 Grange Hermitage

What's your favorite taste?

[Madox58]

I'd get another infraction if I posted that here.
:03:

How many infractions do I have anyway?

[Jimbuna]

Not nearly enough yet.

When will you take delivery of that package?

[vienna]

As long as it's not ticking...

Could this thread be considered a form of chronocide?...


<O>

[Jimbuna]

Or genocide even.

Shan't be doing that again will we?

[Madox58]

I never learned to stop touching the pretty glowy thing on the electric stove. :o
Oh! Look! A pretty glowy thing! OUCH!!!
:/\\!!

If BigFoot is smart enuff to hide from us, How come they don't wear shoes that leave smaller foot prints?
:hmmm:

[TarJak]

Because the blokes that make the footprints haven't thought of that yet.

Shall we dance?

[vienna]

I don't care to...

...but, have you evr danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?...


<O>

[Jimbuna]

Yeah, when I'm in a joking mood.

Can a short person "talk down" to a taller person?

[TarJak]

Ask my wife.

Are you under the thumb?

[u crank]

Yea, but it's a thumb I like. :D

Have you ever been under the board walk?

[TarJak]

On a blanket with my baby.

Where will you be?

[Jimbuna]

In the pub.

Are you up for it?

[TarJak]

Always.

Are you ready for it?

[Sailor Steve]

No, but that's never stopped me before.

Do you know why you're here?

[TarJak]

I only came to clean out the pipes.

What are you waiting for?

[Spiced_Rum]

A. Death. One of life's guarantees, you know it is inevitable but normally not the time it will occur.

Q. Does fear of dying mean that you do not enjoy life as much?

[TarJak]

No it's what drives me to greater heights.

How high are you willing to go?

[Spiced_Rum]

A. As high and as far as I can until the oxygen runs out.

Q. Why does freefalling cost so much?

[Jimbuna]

The business greed for profits.

What does success mean to you?

[Feuer Frei!]

What does success mean to you?

Being the best at something that i do.


If you had to chose between losing an eye or losing a leg, which would it be?

[Tango589]

I'd rather lose a leg, that way I can still hop to the cinema to see the latest 3D blockbuster!

Why doea that 'vacation' feeling wear off so quickly when you're back home?

[Jimbuna]

Because the vacation has come to an end/is over.

When is a table not a table?

[Tango589]

I don't know.

When is a table not a table?

[Jimbuna]

When it's a chair.

Should we start over?

[Tango589]

I think so, that joke was appalling.

How long can this thread keep rumbling on for?

[Jimbuna]

Quite some time.

How can someone "draw a blank"?

[TarJak]

Give me a pencil and paper and I'll show you

How long does it take to get license where you are.?

[Jimbuna]

That depends on the type of licence ie: TV licence, depends on how long the queue is. A forklift licence, one week.

Are you licenced or simply out on bail?

[Feuer Frei!]

Licensed.

Can you name a time where all hope was lost in your life and you didn't see a way out of your troubles?

[BossMark]

Saturday August 17th 1985 when I said those two terrible words "I do"


Will you ever get married?

[Jimbuna]

Already am.

What is the benefit of good housekeeping?

[Tango589]

A clean house.

Is cleanliness really next to godliness?

[Jimbuna]

That would depend on whether God had bathed that day.

How do you teach a fish to swim?

[Admiral Halsey]

Take it to swim school.

What's your biggest guilty pleasure?

[Jimbuna]

The wife.

Would a boxer dog be a south paw?

[Feuer Frei!]

No.

What is wrong with a necro?

[u crank]

Some people like them. Some people don't.

How do you feel?

[Jimbuna]

I feel like locking this thread.

What do you think?

[Tango589]

I think I'll revive the 'crush the previous persons dream' game.

Does this sound like a good idea?

[Sailor Steve]

I had all my dreams crushed years ago.

Do you care?

[Jimbuna]

That depends on the subject matter.

Any takers?

[Tango589]

I'll have 4 of them.

What will I do with them?

[soopaman2]

The human body has multiple orifices, comfort not guaranteed.

Why are hairy nasty fat man nipples ok on regular tv, and not hairy nasty fat female nipples?

[Tango589]

Who said anybody's fat hairy nasty nipples on tv are ok under any circumstances?

Will you miss me when I'm on holiday for a fortnight?

[Jimbuna]

Nope

To be or not to be, that is the question.

[Tango589]

That may be the question but who knows the answer?

Am I paranoid, or people really out to get me?

[Kaptlt.Endrass]

I'm no psychologist, but yes, yes you are.


Why is the world so bloody big!!!??

[vienna]

Actually, you're just very small...

Can you teach relatives Relativity?...


<O>

[u crank]

Relatively speaking that is a good question.

How come you can pick your friends but you can't pick your relatives?

[vienna]

Friends don't grow on trees...

Is it possible there is a pleasant fellow named Kanye East?...


<O>

[Kaptlt.Endrass]

I think he lives in the North West.:huh:

If you could, would you be a U-boat captain in WWII?

[TarJak]

No because WWII ended 60 odd years ago.

Where do enquiring minds come from?

[vienna]

Someone who asked the same question...


Am I wrong in thinking "T'was Brillig an the Slithy Toves" is the name of a jazz quartet?...


<O>

[u crank]

It's all jabberwocky and conjecture.

How many miles was Miles ahead?

[TarJak]

If it's Davis your on about , then he was Streets ahead.

How far behind was Mike Skinner?

[Buddahaid]

By a neck(skin).

Do mermaids wear C-shells?

[Jimbuna]

Not always, some wear Y-fronts apparently.

What if the Hokey Pokey REALLY is what it's all about?

[Tango589]

Then life as we know it is futile.

Does self abuse make you go blind?

[u crank]

I need eye glasses.

Does that count?

[Jimbuna]

I doubt glasses have the ability to carry out mathematical calculations.

At a movie theater which arm rest is yours?

[Tango589]

Which ever you can claim first.

Does the same apply on aircraft?

[Jimbuna]

Not on the flight deck it doesn't.

Why do superheros wear their underwear on the outside of their clothes?

[Tango589]

Have you seen the speed they get changed? No wonder they get it wrong.

What is the point of a superheroes cape?

[TarJak]

It makes them more mysterious and makes sure that you know they are a superhero.

What if God was one of us?

[u crank]

He'd probably be disappointed.

When do the aliens get here?

[Tango589]

who says they haven't already?

What is the point of mosquitoes?

[Jimbuna]

Malaria

Who will win the FA Cup this year?

[Tango589]

Accrington Stanley.

Can you get clothes in the size Extra-Medium?

[Jimbuna]

Only if you pay extra.

Why are women and men's shoe sizes different?

[vienna]

Because men believe it pays to advertise....


In the battle of the sexes, what happens if it's a draw?...


<O>

[TarJak]

You win a mother-in-law as prize.

What do you do with a drunken sailor?

[u crank]

Encourage him to join SubSim.

Where is Neverland?

[Kaptlt.Endrass]

Follow the Fairy dust trail, and you'll get there.

If you're attacking a convoy in SH3 and have a hot date, what do you do?

[Rockstar]

ask her to load your torpedo.

am I for real?

[fireftr18]

No, your just pixels on a computer screen.

Is reality really real?

[Kaptlt.Endrass]

Nope, all just on a screen as well.

Why are we here on earth?

[TarJak]

To effect the end of the world.

What's your plan?

[Kaptlt.Endrass]

To end the world.

What are you going to do about it?

[TarJak]

Nothing.

Where's you momma?

[Jimbuna]

At home watching television.

Where's yours?

[TarJak]

Same

Who's yo daddy?

[Jimbuna]

Momma never did say :hmmm:

What was the best thing BEFORE sliced bread?

[BossMark]

Unsliced bread. Bread is awesome in any form. :yep:

Do you agree?

[TarJak]

Yes and no

Can this thing actually work?

[Jimbuna]

Yes, it it's not broken.

How do you make seven even?

[TarJak]

By adding 3.5 to 3.5

Where are my shoes?

[u crank]

If you're doing it right, one on each foot.

What's the difference between sneakers and runners?

[Sailor Steve]

If you're doing it right, one on each foot.

What's the difference between sneakers and runners?
Sneakers are coming in, runners are leaving.

Why call it a television set when there's only one?

[Rockstar]

You will know after learning the difference between an adjective and a verb.


Was my answer correct?

[Tango589]

Technically.

Why did the beach blush?

[STEED]

It saw a naked jim. :o

Have you seen a naked jim on the loose?

[Jimbuna]

Not since I started wearing clothes outdoors.

How fast do you need to cook for it to be considered "Fast Food"?

[Kaptlt.Endrass]

4 minutes according to drive thru.

Because we're bad people, when will our reunion in Hell be?

[TarJak]

Too late. We're already in heaven.

Why won't heaven wait?

[Jimbuna]

Because it had to catch the last bus before it left.

Where does the "o" come from when we abbreviate "number"?

[Kaptlt.Endrass]

Because I was the one who helped make all the abbreviations in this world.

What is the average age of a great-great-great grandfather snail?

[TarJak]

14 just like you.

Can we get off this ride?

[soopaman2]

No you're in it for the duration, shoulda brought a puke bag and some viagra.

Is loudly farting on elevators as funny to you as it is to me?

[fireftr18]

Yes, especially when you see the look on people's faces.
If someone else on an elevator let out nasty stinking one, would you stay on?

[Kaptlt.Endrass]

Of course not, I would let the next poor lad take the fall.

What would you do with a not-drunken sailor?

[Jimbuna]

Buy him a drink.

What can a deaf person use instead of an Alarm Clock?

[STEED]

Electric shock clock.

Why have the super super rich not cleared off to Mars yet?

[TarJak]

The ship isn't finished.

Will STEED be on the trip to mars?

[Jimbuna]

Still more money to be conned out of the poor on Earth yet.

What does GOOGLE stand for?

[Jimbuna]

Crossed post so answer to TJ...not much chance if he won't even go to York.

What does GOOGLE stand for?

[Kaptlt.Endrass]

General Organism Optimized for Gratification and Logical Exploration:up: (100% sure)

What does BING stand for?

[TarJak]

Bring It Numb Guts

What is the value of ecks?

[Jimbuna]

I'm eckt if I know

Why are Softballs hard?

[Pisces]

They overcompensate in envy of the smaller golf balls.

Who should I vote for tomorrow?

[TarJak]

Vote for STEED.

Is might always right?

[vienna]

Might be...


Is there such a thing as "Dry Paint" sign?...


<O>

[Jimbuna]

Touch it and find out.

Do Butterfly's make Butter?

[TarJak]

Only if you can work out how to milk them.

Milking time?

[Jimbuna]

Not yet, beer time is first.

Does the Queen Bee have a King?

[Kaptlt.Endrass]

No, the Queen's actually a drag King.

If a tree falls in the forest and no one's around to hear it, does it make a sound?

[Pisces]

It makes a sound move, as otherwise it would defy gravity.

Do Queens also make those smelly sounds, like everyone else?

[Jimbuna]

I know mine does.

Are we there yet?

[fireftr18]

We've been there for a while.
Where have you been?

[Jimbuna]

Most probably around there as well.

Is a gold knife and fork still considered Silverware?

[Eichhörnchen]

I don't know.
How many nuts has Catfish got?

[Rockstar]

He got two in each hand and two in his mouth.


Am I going to hell now?

[Catfish]

^ Straight to! :haha:
Eichhörnchen has more nuts than any superhero, but how much exactly?

[Aktungbby]

^ Straight to! :haha:
Eichhörnchen has more nuts than any superhero, but how much exactly? MUCH ADO ABOUT NADA I'LL WAGER! IF A DADDY TEACHES HIS OFFSPRING HOW TO PLAY SILENT HUNTER....ARE THE SIMS OF THE FATHER VISITED UPON THE SON?:hmmm:

[Eichhörnchen]

Yes, especially when it's Grand Theft Auto.
What (besides chewing-gum) loses its flavour on the bedpost overnight?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x6bFTVi0hHs

[Eichhörnchen]

I can't even remember the answer to that myself now... I better ask another one:

How many badge wearing squirrel mischief operatives are there on Subsim right now?

[Catfish]

^ re chewing gum you should have asked Lonnie back then :hmmm:

^^^^ re post by Rockstar #2903 (https://www.subsim.com/radioroom/showpost.php?p=2594711&postcount=2903) it seems instead of going to hell, hell has closed in on him in America.

Real answer re 2907, which is also a new question:
Who cares?

[Eichhörnchen]

Ah but you have to give an answer... even if it's nonsense... so that will do just fine :)

Now what's your question?

[Catfish]

What is the number of stars in what you call milky way?

[mapuc]

There's only one star in Milky Way

How many Unicorn is there left in the the fairytale world ?

Markus

[Texas Red]

There's only one star in Milky Way

How many Unicorn is there left in the the fairytale world ?

Markus

Absolutely none since the fairytale world is dead.

If a baby’s butt pops out of its mother at 11:59 PM, and the head comes out at 12:01 AM, what day will the baby be declared to be born on?

[Aktungbby]

the day they cut the umbilical cord!:yeah: Speaking of cords: How much wood can a woodchuck chuck when he's chuckin' wood?

[Texas Red]

the day they cut the umbilical cord!:yeah: Speaking of cords: How much wood can a woodchuck chuck when he's chuckin' wood?


Gahhh!! I hate this question!! My friends tell me the answer all the time and I forget it every time.

He would chuck enough wood.

Do fish get thirsty? :hmmm:

[Catfish]

Only saltwater fishes get thirsty.

Why is the sky blue?

[Eisenwurst]

Cause God is a big Elvis fan....."Blue Suede Shoes...Blue Hawaii...."

Why are smokes so damn expensive?????

[Sean C]

Because the wages of death is sinful.


Who'll stop the rain?

[Jimbuna]

Whoever turns the sky tap off first.

What happens when you get 'scared half to death' twice?

[Eisenwurst]

You buy 2 sets of underwear, and a lottery ticket.

If you're complete in Heaven....does that mean that Jewish guys get their foreskins back????

[Jimbuna]

That depends upon whether they object to them having already been used or not.

Is it true cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?