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frau kaleun
06-10-13, 03:23 PM
*looks around*
I think I kinda already did. :O:
What would you do for a Klondike bar?
Edit: oops, that was meant to be a response to Steve's question!
Spiced_Rum
06-10-13, 03:34 PM
A. I have no idea what a Klondike bar is, but it does sound rather naughty.
Q. Which is better, chocolate or vanilla ice cream?
Sailor Steve
06-10-13, 03:43 PM
Yes. Mixed is nice too.
Stawberry or cherry?
Spiced_Rum
06-10-13, 04:14 PM
A. Cherry, but made with fresh fruit.
Q. Ice cream in a wafer cone or a sundae bowl?
Sailor Steve
06-10-13, 04:33 PM
Sundae bowl, with the other sundae stuff.
Shake or malt?
Spiced_Rum
06-11-13, 02:34 AM
A. Shake. Banana, vanilla ice cream, and full fat milk.
Q. Do bananas really belong in a smoothie?
BossMark
06-11-13, 03:01 AM
Not really no
Hows does an Irishman eat a banana?
Sailor Steve
06-11-13, 08:56 AM
With a potato chaser.
Why are potatoes called "spuds"?
mookiemookie
06-11-13, 09:13 AM
http://mentalfloss.com/article/13090/why-are-potatoes-called-spuds
On the topic of potatoes, what's your favorite way to eat them?
Sailor Steve
06-11-13, 09:17 AM
Fried. Baked. Mashed. Raw. It depends on what I'm eating with.
Does anyone else think he should have made up a silly answer rather than post a link? :O:
Not that I'm serious. I really did wonder. A little.
mookiemookie
06-11-13, 10:13 AM
Why make up a silly answer when you can learn a bit of knowledge? :know:
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Sailor Steve
06-11-13, 11:14 AM
He wouldn't. He would read the thread and know that question's been asked three times now, the last time on the page just before this one.
Am I the only person who reads the thread?
mookiemookie
06-11-13, 01:00 PM
I'm sure some people have read all 1,260 posts in this thread. I'm sure some other people know what one of Steve's pet peevs is and asked the qustion that he asked for no other reson than to wind Steve up.
I have no idea who that would be though. :shifty: :hmm2:
If you were stuck on a desert island and could only bring an ipod with only 10 songs on it, what 10 songs would they be?
Feuer Frei!
06-12-13, 06:07 AM
If you were stuck on a desert island and could only bring an ipod with only 10 songs on it, what 10 songs would they be?
Wouldn't be any songs for me, don't use ipods.
I'll make do with banging together some coconut shells instead.
What is the most unusual thing you have ever seen in life?
You banging coconuts to make music.
Why do coconuts sound musical?
mookiemookie
06-12-13, 08:12 AM
You banging coconuts to make music.
Why do coconuts sound musical?
They don't. They sound like horses.
http://i.imgur.com/5px00Ad.jpg
If you were dictator of the world, what would your first rule be?
frau kaleun
06-12-13, 08:38 AM
NO WIRE HANGERS!!!!
If you had a hammer, would you hammer in the morning?
Sailor Steve
06-12-13, 10:21 AM
Yes. I'd hammer in the evening too. All over this land.
To be or not to be: Is that really a question?
BossMark
06-12-13, 01:48 PM
Well Mr Shakespeare must have thought so.
Who was the 3rd president of the United States?
Sailor Steve
06-12-13, 02:00 PM
Thomas Jefferson.
Who was the third emperor of Rome?
mookiemookie
06-12-13, 02:13 PM
Thomas Jefferson.
Who was the third emperor of Rome?
Some guy who did as the Romans did. I mean he was there, and all.
Who was the third James Bond?
Spiced_Rum
06-12-13, 04:37 PM
A. There is only one Bond, James Bond.
The actor who played the third one in the 'serious' films (i.e. not Casio royal with Peter Sellers & David Nivan) was Roger Moore. Although technically Sean Connery did replace George Lazenby for 'Diamonds Are Forever' in 1971.
Q. Is a Martini with Vodka better than an traditional Martini with Gin?
WernherVonTrapp
06-12-13, 04:51 PM
IMO, yes, with 3 olives please. But, that may not count since I don't drink anymore.
What makes the hottentot so hot?
Spiced_Rum
06-12-13, 05:58 PM
The word Hottentot is first recorded in the late 17th century and was a name applied by white Europeans to the Khoikhoi. It is now regarded as offensive with reference to people and should always be avoided in favour of Khoikhoi or the names of the particular peoples. The only standard use for Hottentot in modern use is in the names of animals and plants. - Oxford Dictionaries
A. And I thought it meant 10 Zombies (hot-ten-tot) - warm 10 deceased.
Q. Do Zombies see in colour?
WernherVonTrapp
06-12-13, 06:31 PM
I've never seen one in color, myself.
Who put the Ape in Āpricot?
BossMark
06-13-13, 01:36 PM
The bloke who decided how to spell it.
Why did he do it this way:hmm2:?
Spiced_Rum
06-13-13, 02:36 PM
A. The name apricot possibly derives from the Latin word praecox, which means 'early ripening,' similar to the word 'precocious.' Easier to say than its Latin name Prunus armeniaca.
Q. Why is a cranberry a berry and not a current?
WernherVonTrapp
06-13-13, 03:07 PM
A. The name apricot possibly derives from the Latin word praecox, which means 'early ripening,' similar to the word 'precocious.' Easier to say than its Latin name Prunus armeniaca.
Q. Why is a cranberry a berry and not a current?
Possibly because it has to be aged and doesn't have good electrical properties. A "currant", on the other hand, might have been harder to answer.:D
What makes the muskrat guard his musk?:hmmm:
Spiced_Rum
06-13-13, 03:39 PM
Current, doh! :oops:
A. Because Muskdeer is so expensive.
Q. Why are carrots orange and carats gold?
Sailor Steve
06-13-13, 04:10 PM
Because one helps the eyes and the other just looks good to them.
Speaking of carats...
Why is a diamond in the rough?
Spiced_Rum
06-13-13, 04:29 PM
A. Because the highwayman swallowed it after the robbery to hide it. (Assume that he also took the cut diamonds as well).
Q. Does that make him a rough diamond or a diamond geezer?
WernherVonTrapp
06-13-13, 04:34 PM
It makes him a diamond thief.
What makes the dawn come up like thunder?!
Spiced_Rum
06-13-13, 04:42 PM
A. Devastators from Torpedo Squadron Eight. :salute:
Q. How big is the crack of dawn?
WernherVonTrapp
06-13-13, 05:09 PM
About as big as a crack.:D
What makes the elephant charge his tusk in the misty mist, or the dusky dusk?
frau kaleun
06-13-13, 08:25 PM
COURAGE!
What thoughts would I be thinkin', would I be another Lincoln, if I only had a brain?
Sailor Steve
06-13-13, 08:31 PM
You'd be thinkin' "Maybe we should stay home tonight".
Is life a jolly holiday with Mary?
Prolly the same thoughts you have now.
As to being another Lincoln, are we talking about the car or the president?
WernherVonTrapp
06-14-13, 02:52 AM
COURAGE!
Geeez, somebody finally got it!:haha:
As to being another Lincoln, are we talking about the car or the president? We're talking about the Scarecrow.
What do they got, that I ain't got?
Spiced_Rum
06-14-13, 03:17 AM
Lion: “What makes the Hottentots so hot? What puts the “ape” in apricot? Whatta they got that I ain't got?”
A. Courage. OK, now I get it. Obviously missed the details of the dialogue every time I watch the film at Christmas. The flying monkeys still freak me out.
Q. Is a heart judged by how much you love?
WernherVonTrapp
06-14-13, 03:55 AM
A. Courage. OK, now I get it. Obviously missed the details of the dialogue every time I watch the film at Christmas. The flying monkeys still freak me out.
Q. Is a heart judged by how much you love?
http://i1045.photobucket.com/albums/b456/archangel501/Smileys/a39c1860.gifNo, but how much you are loved by others.
If you are the police, where are your badges?:hmmm:
Spiced_Rum
06-14-13, 04:28 AM
A. "Badges, to god-damned hell with badges! We have no badges. In fact, we don't need badges. I don't have to show you any stinking badges..."
Q. Federal officer! Get down now! Duck or Die?
WernherVonTrapp
06-14-13, 04:56 AM
Take her! (I think)
(Haha, True Lies, great movie. Jamie Lee Curtis was so hot.)
What do you say there Bob, guy like that make it, yes or no?
Spiced_Rum
06-14-13, 08:09 AM
Spot on. True Lies and Trading Places are my favourite 2 Jamie Lee Curtis films.
A. Uh-huh.
"Uh-huh. I have to tell you, that's precisely what I saw. Sometimes I just look at a guy... and I know this fella's not gonna make it."
Q. Where's Barnes?
Sailor Steve
06-14-13, 09:33 AM
Down at the barn looking for Barney.
Do you drink a fifth on the fourth?
I didn't get the "Courage" thing either, but I'm still upset that Tarjak posted a minute after me, but he was addressed while I was ignored.
Spiced_Rum
06-14-13, 01:14 PM
A. No but I have quaffed a double on the Firth of Forth.
Q. Who is on third base?
WernherVonTrapp
06-14-13, 02:55 PM
I Don't Know's on third.
When you pay off the first baseman every month, who gets the money?
frau kaleun
06-14-13, 02:56 PM
Well, naturally.
The who with the what now?
WernherVonTrapp
06-14-13, 04:20 PM
No. What is on second base.
Who's playing first?
Spiced_Rum
06-14-13, 04:52 PM
A. Yes, Who's on first.
Q. When you pay off the first baseman every month, Who gets the money?
Sailor Steve
06-14-13, 05:04 PM
Every penny of it. And why not? He deserves it.
Why are we going in circles?
Spiced_Rum
06-14-13, 05:51 PM
A. I'm not... stay out of the infield! I want to know what's the guy's name in left field?
Q. What time tomorrow are you gonna tell me who's pitching?
fireftr18
06-14-13, 08:40 PM
Who doesn't pitch, he's on first.
What is the pitcher's name?
WernherVonTrapp
06-14-13, 08:57 PM
No, What's on second.
The pitcher's name?
Spiced_Rum
06-15-13, 02:14 AM
A. Tomorrow
Q. The catcher's name?
u crank
06-15-13, 06:22 AM
I'll tell you later today.
Who invented baseball?
BossMark
06-15-13, 06:59 AM
Abner Doubleday in 1839 but its only a myth
Why is it a myth?
frau kaleun
06-15-13, 09:00 AM
Becauthe it'th thtill thyngle.
Baseball, or football?
Sailor Steve
06-15-13, 10:40 AM
Bored by both.
F1 or Indycar?
frau kaleun
06-15-13, 10:43 AM
Bored by both.
F1 or Indycar?
F1, when I still watched auto sports.
Wimbledon, or US Open?
BossMark
06-15-13, 10:47 AM
Tennis is boring now (I did like to watch the likes of Connors,Nastase and McEnroe) know characters in the game :nope:
Motorbikes or pedal bikes?
Sailor Steve
06-15-13, 11:14 AM
Both have their place.
Props or jets?
soopaman2
06-15-13, 12:37 PM
Both have their place.
Props or jets?
JETS.
All you need is an A-10 and a few fighters, and a Spectre Gunship, and nothing on air sea or land will live.
Why is the American media so scummy and self serving?
Spiced_Rum
06-15-13, 01:54 PM
A. Because it feeds the obsessive celebrity culture of ****less self absorbed masses:06:
Q. Why can we not have newspapers like the Daily Planet?
Because Perry White doesn't exist and Rupert Murdoch does.
When do I get me time?
u crank
06-15-13, 05:41 PM
Soon as you put your quarter in.
If time could fly, where would it go?
WernherVonTrapp
06-15-13, 06:46 PM
It does fly and it goes nowhere, fast.
If you can kill time, why does the clock keep ticking?:o
BossMark
06-16-13, 04:52 AM
Time stops for know one
What is your favourite time?
Spiced_Rum
06-16-13, 08:27 AM
A. Tea time
Q. When is party time?
WernherVonTrapp
06-16-13, 12:22 PM
Whenever one feels that it is.:D
What does a clock have to do to become a Grandfather Clock?
Spiced_Rum
06-16-13, 01:20 PM
A. No idea. But it stopped, short, never to go again, when the old man died.
Q. How do you adjust a sundial for daylight savings time?
Sailor Steve
06-16-13, 01:35 PM
Count on your fingers and lie a lot.
Why did you have to answer with that song? I already had it stuck in my head. :O:
Spiced_Rum
06-16-13, 02:03 PM
A. Because I already had "Hickety, dickety, dock, The mouse ran up the clock:" as an ear worm and did not want to pass that on to anyone.
Q. Is it possible to use a water clock in the shower?
Feuer Frei!
06-16-13, 07:13 PM
No it can't.
What was the water clock replaced by?
The Rolex Oyster.
If I could turn back time, when would it be?
WernherVonTrapp
06-16-13, 07:38 PM
Whenever you did it.
If time waits for no one, why do the hours pass by?
Jimbuna
06-17-13, 12:37 PM
If space is a vacuum, who changes the bags?
WernherVonTrapp
06-17-13, 02:29 PM
No one, it's not a vacuum cleaner.
Why didn't you answer my question?:D
u crank
06-17-13, 03:23 PM
If time waits for no one, why do the hours pass by?
The hours pass by because time is on a tight schedule.
Where does the time go?
The hours pass by because time is on a tight schedule.
Where does the time go?
Down the pub to get blind stinking drunk if it had any sense.
Where is Arthur two sheds Jackson?
u crank
06-17-13, 03:38 PM
Looking for his other shed.
Why is Joe Jackson shoeless?
Jimbuna
06-17-13, 04:20 PM
No one, it's not a vacuum cleaner.
Why didn't you answer my question?:D
I didn't have the time :)
Spiced_Rum
06-17-13, 04:29 PM
A. So that he could show his white socks.
Q. What are Los Angeles Dodging?
Jimbuna
06-17-13, 04:32 PM
The draft.
Why must it be so?
WernherVonTrapp
06-17-13, 05:52 PM
I didn't have the time :):haha: Ahhhh, I get it now. Nice!
__________________________________________________ _
It is it, and so is so, there's no must in it.
If an athlete gets Athlete's Foot, does an astronaut get Mistletoe?
Sailor Steve
06-17-13, 09:08 PM
The draft.
Why must it be so?
Just cuz.
If I'm right, why do I constantly feel the need to explain myself?
Red October1984
06-17-13, 09:24 PM
If I'm right, why do I constantly feel the need to explain myself?
Because some people need some things explained.
Will I ever do anything but screw up?
BossMark
06-18-13, 03:02 AM
No things can only get better :yep:
Why do I get so drunk for?
Jimbuna
06-18-13, 07:09 AM
Apart from loved ones...probably nobody.
If Superman is so smart why does he wear his underpants over his trousers?
He's a wet liberal voter.
Why is the Hulk green? :hmmm:
Spiced_Rum
06-18-13, 01:47 PM
A. Because Wonder Woman is having an affair with Spiderman.
Q. Is the Silver Surfer an old age pensioner?
Jimbuna
06-18-13, 02:16 PM
Only on pension day.
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
WernherVonTrapp
06-18-13, 06:27 PM
No, it's because the costume scares them away.
Would Emmett Kelly have been able to smile while in costume?
No, it's because the costume scares them away.
Would Emmett Kelly have been able to smile while in costume?
Only in his dressing room.
Seriously though, why are you scared of clowns?
Cybermat47
06-18-13, 09:00 PM
Because they're creepy.
Dost thou liketh Shakespeare-eth?
Red October1984
06-18-13, 11:21 PM
Because they're creepy.
Dost thou liketh Shakespeare-eth?
Once upon a fortnight of March, I read the Romeo and Juliet story.
I didn't like it enough to want to read anymore Shakespeare. :yep:
The question is....
Dost thou liketh Shakespeare's style of writing?
BossMark
06-19-13, 01:48 AM
Its not bad I suppose to say he was from Warwickshire.
Whats your favourite Shakespeare play?
fireftr18
06-19-13, 10:07 AM
"Much Ado About Nothing"
Why can't Shakespeare be done in modern English?
frau kaleun
06-19-13, 11:08 AM
Because then it's not Shakespeare, it's somebody else retelling one of his* stories in their own words.
But, soft! What light through yonder window breaks?
*And most of "his" stories weren't his to begin with. :O:
Red October1984
06-19-13, 12:12 PM
My baseball doth breaketh Frau Kaleun's window on the summer's eve.
Do I have to pay for it? :hmmm:
frau kaleun
06-19-13, 12:19 PM
If you prick us, do we not bleed? If
you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you poison us, do we not die?
And if you wrong us, do we not revenge? If we are like you in the
rest, we will resemble you in that.
Now... will that be cash, or check?
Red October1984
06-19-13, 12:31 PM
If you prick us, do we not bleed? If
you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you poison us, do we not die?
And if you wrong us, do we not revenge? If we are like you in the
rest, we will resemble you in that.
Now... will that be cash, or check?
http://i.qkme.me/3ujf8o.jpg
On the other hand, will you take payment in pennies? :03:
Sailor Steve
06-19-13, 12:43 PM
PayPal only.
Why is your 'Shakesperian' middle english so bad?
frau kaleun
06-19-13, 12:44 PM
:stare:
How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is
To have a thankless child!
Fine. You pay me in copper pennies, I'll give you the change in brass knuckles.
Would you prefer it if I led with my left, or my right?
Sailor Steve
06-19-13, 12:53 PM
It depends on what kind of dance we're doing.
Who should lead in a foxtrot?
Spiced_Rum
06-19-13, 12:58 PM
Would you prefer it if I led with my left, or my right?
A. “I would challenge you to a battle of wits, but I see you are unarmed!”
Q. Are Rosencrantz and Guildenstern dead?
frau kaleun
06-19-13, 01:05 PM
They might as well be.
Do you think death could possibly be a boat?
Spiced_Rum
06-19-13, 01:16 PM
A. No. Death is the ultimate negative. Not-being. You can't not-be on a boat.
Q. The question doesn't arise, because you're on a boat, aren't you?
Sailor Steve
06-19-13, 01:18 PM
I'm not on a boat, I'm on a computer.
Why have I been ignored again? Twice?
frau kaleun
06-19-13, 01:27 PM
I'm not on a boat, I'm on a computer.
Why have I been ignored again? Twice?
I didn't ignore you on purpose! You just replied too fast. :O:
But here you go:
Who should lead in a foxtrot?
I'm not sure.
Is this before or after I drink the whiskey and do a tango?
Red October1984
06-19-13, 01:33 PM
But it takes two to tango....
Do they even have whiskey in Skyrim?
Sailor Steve
06-19-13, 01:35 PM
I think only she can answer that.
Did you notice how I was just uber-zinged, by the best?
:rotfl2:
frau kaleun
06-19-13, 01:43 PM
I think only she can answer that.
And so I shall.
Do they even have whiskey in Skyrim?
What they have in Skyrim is mead. Lots and lots of mead. Mead, mead, mead... stupid bees and their stupid honey.
Would it kill them to get some beer once in a while?
Jimbuna
06-19-13, 01:45 PM
Nothing new there then :)
If swimming is good for your shape, then why do the whales look like the way they do?
Red October1984
06-19-13, 02:11 PM
They eat.....a LOT!
Have you seen Finding Nemo?
Jimbuna
06-19-13, 02:26 PM
http://img822.imageshack.us/img822/160/1uva.jpg (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/822/1uva.jpg/)
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
Spiced_Rum
06-19-13, 02:40 PM
I used to be schizophrenic but I am all right now...
and so am I?
Edit: thought that I was on the 'Last to post thread'. D'oh
Red October1984
06-19-13, 02:45 PM
@ Jimbuna :rotfl2: :rotfl2: :rotfl2:
I guess you're fine SR because you didn't ask a question.
Why didn't you ask a question?
Spiced_Rum
06-19-13, 02:50 PM
A. I was laughing at my wit so much (and wondering who I may offend by mentioning mental health issues) that I forgot to post.
Q. Why do we laugh when someone slips up on a banana?
Jimbuna
06-19-13, 02:58 PM
Because it's the silliest way of trying to break that bar of chocolate in your back pocket.
If tin whistles are made out of tin, what do they make fog horns out of?
Spiced_Rum
06-19-13, 03:03 PM
A. Chicken (rooster). Foghorn Leghorn.
Q. Fried chicken or roasted chicken?
Red October1984
06-19-13, 03:24 PM
Fried Chicken all the way. Our local church picnic is widely known across the surrounding states for our fried chicken.
Why is that even a question? Fried is obviously better. :)
Spiced_Rum
06-19-13, 03:29 PM
A. Some prefer roast chicken, roasted potatoes, carrots (and veggies of choice) stuffing, and gravy.
Q. Hamburger or beefburger?
WernherVonTrapp
06-19-13, 03:36 PM
Black Angus or Turkey burger, please.:up:
What's your beef jerky?
Red October1984
06-19-13, 04:08 PM
My Deer jerky is made of Deer!
Is that okay with you? :06:
WernherVonTrapp
06-19-13, 05:01 PM
Yes, I used to be nervous and jerky, but I'm not nervous anymore.:D
Is "Deer" singular or plural?
Red October1984
06-19-13, 05:08 PM
Both. Same with Moose. :)
Has anybody here had Venison?
WernherVonTrapp
06-19-13, 05:17 PM
Venison hotdogs, hamburgers, pepperoni, salami, back-strap, smoked hind quarter and jerky.:D:up:
Has anyone here eaten gray squirrel or squab?
Red October1984
06-19-13, 05:52 PM
I've shot, cooked and eaten a gray squirrel all in one day. I even cooked it over our fire pit. :O:
Does that sound good to you?
u crank
06-19-13, 06:01 PM
Um, lemme think....no.
How about octopus?
Sailor Steve
06-19-13, 06:04 PM
Yep. I've had octopus, squid and shark. Even squid jerky once.
Ever had a Buffalo burger?
Red October1984
06-19-13, 06:43 PM
No. I eat burgers from cities in Missouri...not New York.
How about chicken sandwiches?
WernherVonTrapp
06-19-13, 07:02 PM
Hmmm, I wasn't afraid to eat one.
Where's the sand in your sandwich?
Feuer Frei!
06-20-13, 02:11 AM
Ask the Earl of Sandwich.
Do you spend more on Clothes or Fuel?
Fuel of all kinds
How do you fuel your anger?
WernherVonTrapp
06-20-13, 07:02 AM
I always try to drain the tank before I reach that destination.
Do people in Anger Management get paid more than people in anger?
Jimbuna
06-20-13, 08:41 AM
Not sure, I'll have to ask my therapist.
If you saw a heat wave, would you wave back?
frau kaleun
06-20-13, 08:46 AM
No. I'd give it the cold shoulder.
Don't you know you're gonna shock the monkey?
Sailor Steve
06-20-13, 09:05 AM
My monkey objects.
If I see no evil, does evil see me?
Jimbuna
06-20-13, 09:10 AM
All the time.
If your car says Dodge on the front of it, do you really need a horn?
Sailor Steve
06-20-13, 09:14 AM
Yes, for the pedestrians who can't read.
If I can't think of a good question right now, does this count as a question anyway?
No..You have been fined.
What kind of fine should Steve get?
Jimbuna
06-20-13, 11:25 AM
Anything would be fine by me :03:
If you're a kleptomaniac, is there something you can take for it?
Yes...steal the Earth.
If your a sex maniac are you not getting enough sex?
Red October1984
06-20-13, 01:40 PM
:hmmm: Not quite sure. I'm a bit young to be a sex maniac.
Have you sent fan mail to any celebrities?
BossMark
06-20-13, 02:05 PM
No bloody way most of them are ignorant sods and not worth the effort, but I was going ask Geoff Boycott for his autograph until I found out he was a man u fan.
How about you?
Jimbuna
06-20-13, 02:13 PM
Once gave a light to Shane Warne after a cricket match.
What do sheep count when they can't get to sleep?
Spiced_Rum
06-20-13, 02:23 PM
A. They cannot count so just think about jumping fences.
Q. Do robots dream of electric sheep?
u crank
06-20-13, 03:26 PM
I don't. :O:
Are sheep cold after they are sheared?
Jimbuna
06-20-13, 04:17 PM
Most definitely.
What do chickens think we taste like?
Spiced_Rum
06-20-13, 05:20 PM
A. Very tasty fat balls
Q. If a sheep has been sheared does than mean she is naked?
Red October1984
06-20-13, 07:27 PM
Only if the sheep is over the age of consent.
How old is that in Sheep years?
175
Why is Jimbuna so fascinated by sheep?
Red October1984
06-20-13, 07:54 PM
That's a good question to ask him. :hmmm:
Am I crazy?
Sailor Steve
06-20-13, 09:25 PM
Crazy's not the right word. Let's just say "different". :O:
Why would I even say a thing like that?
Red October1984
06-20-13, 09:44 PM
Because it's true. :woot:
Here's another one for you.
Am I too hard on myself? :hmmm: Let's see what kind of answer that gets. :O:
WernherVonTrapp
06-20-13, 10:14 PM
The answer lies within, Grasshopper.
Now, can you snatch the pebble from my hand? http://i1045.photobucket.com/albums/b456/archangel501/Smileys/30b37a7e.gif
Red October1984
06-20-13, 10:22 PM
http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m950jaxqPV1qjtfi2.jpg
The real question is can I pick it up off the ground after you drop it? :hmmm:
Do I win? :hmmm:
WernherVonTrapp
06-20-13, 10:35 PM
Not if I don't drop it and you don't drop me.
Have you been there, done that?:03:
Red October1984
06-20-13, 10:36 PM
Got the T-Shirt.
What's the biggest size of shoe you have ever worn?
WernherVonTrapp
06-20-13, 10:41 PM
My dads.
Do you judge a man by his shoe size?
Red October1984
06-20-13, 10:47 PM
No. Never. :)
Can't I just ask a question?
WernherVonTrapp
06-20-13, 10:52 PM
Sure, ask away.:D
Can I go to bed now?:haha:
Red October1984
06-20-13, 11:03 PM
Sure. Go ahead.
Anybody else?
Spiced_Rum
06-21-13, 05:18 AM
A. Sleep in over rated; just have another java and cookie.
Q. What is the longest time that you have not had sleep (stayed awake)?
Jimbuna
06-21-13, 06:59 AM
Almost four days.
What do they call a French kiss in France?
Spiced_Rum
06-21-13, 07:05 AM
A. baiser amoureux "lover's kiss" or baiser avec la langue "kiss with the tongue".
Q. Have you had a Glasgow kiss?
Jimbuna
06-21-13, 07:11 AM
Once and the bugga got three months and a broken jaw.
What do they call coffee breaks at the Lipton Tea Company?
Red October1984
06-21-13, 11:20 AM
BLASPHEMY!
Do giraffes take the elevator?
Spiced_Rum
06-21-13, 11:39 AM
A. You are having a laugh. They use the stairs.
Q. What makes a hyena laugh?
Jimbuna
06-21-13, 11:44 AM
Usually good humour.
What do you call a bedroom with no bed in it?
Spiced_Rum
06-21-13, 11:48 AM
A. My study / submarine command centre.
Q. What do you call a bathroom with no bath?
Red October1984
06-21-13, 11:57 AM
An outhouse!
Do you have a green card?
No but you can have my grey card on the back of my note book.
Are you having a fry up with Big Foot this weekend?
Red October1984
06-21-13, 12:24 PM
I don't think anybody wants to have a fry up with me.
Do I have the biggest foot on Subsim?
Jimbuna
06-21-13, 01:05 PM
Depends on whether it's in metric or imperial.
What do you call a male ladybug?
Ladybird
What windward sailing for something?
Jimbuna
06-21-13, 01:13 PM
If my translation is correct it is sailing upwind.
What do you call male ballerinas?
(Right:up: ) Danseur
What will you find the solenoid?
Jimbuna
06-21-13, 01:25 PM
That depends on whether we are discussing pneumatics or hydraulics.
What does Geronimo say when he jumps out of a plane?
This is nothing like falling off horse. Much bigger fall.
Is the left side more fun to drive than the right side of the car?
Red October1984
06-21-13, 01:47 PM
I've never driven on the right side of a car.
Why do other countries drive opposite us? :hmmm:
To avoid you after you had a few pints.
I have no question so I am fined to drink a bottle of coke zero. OK..Here goes glug glug belch.
I now have a question..
Dose Stargate SG1 Rock?
It's Good to Be King
How many beers will it be tonight?
Jimbuna
06-21-13, 02:24 PM
One too many.
Will happenstance happen.
Spiced_Rum
06-21-13, 02:32 PM
A. There is a chance that the circumstance might be right.
Q. Is it fate or destiny?
Jimbuna
06-21-13, 02:34 PM
More like desire.
What hair colour do they put on the driver's license of a bald man?
Spiced_Rum
06-21-13, 02:37 PM
A. Depends if he wears a wig.
Q. Does a driver's license have hair colour?
Jimbuna
06-21-13, 02:42 PM
Well mine does.
Are we there yet?
No.
Short-haired or long-haired.
Red October1984
06-21-13, 03:16 PM
Depends on the Gender
Do you like short haired women?
Spiced_Rum
06-21-13, 04:16 PM
A. Depends on how short but generally no, shoulder length is preferable.
Q. Would you date a woman with dyed hair?
Red October1984
06-21-13, 04:24 PM
Depends on the color. Emma Stone dyes her hair....being a natural blonde and all. I'd date her.
Was that a good enough answer?
Spiced_Rum
06-21-13, 04:27 PM
A. It answered the question but I did not fully understand the answer.
Q. Who is Emma Stone?
Red October1984
06-21-13, 04:29 PM
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-4i-WD9J6QkM/UOT0XTUtQaI/AAAAAAAAADI/EuBrJg5Rsmk/s1600/Emma-Stone-Jewish.jpg
That answer your question?
Red and will get a bed time soon,:O:
Spiced_Rum
06-21-13, 04:31 PM
A. Perfect answer, and if I may say a rather attractive young lady.
Q. But is she really a blonde, or does she actually have auburn hair dyed blonde?
Jimbuna
06-21-13, 04:33 PM
Who cares.
Do we have two entrants into the post race?
Spiced_Rum
06-21-13, 04:35 PM
A. Possibly. I type slow because not everyone reads quickly.
Q. Can the human race be won in a day?
Red October1984
06-21-13, 04:36 PM
Red and will get a bed time soon,:O:
Nah...not for a few months when I'll need to go to bed at midnight. :hmmm:
Sorry for disrupting the series of questions.
@Spiced_Rum
What do you mean. This isn't a race.
What's your favorite book ever?
Jimbuna
06-21-13, 04:37 PM
The Epilogue
When does it start making sense?
u crank
06-21-13, 04:40 PM
When the nonsense ends.
What's the farthest you have walked?
Jimbuna
06-21-13, 04:47 PM
To the bar next door.
Time for another?
Bedtime soon
Water or desert
u crank
06-21-13, 04:49 PM
Just opened one. Canadian Bud.
Watcha drinkin'?
Twinings Irish Breakfast Tea.
Where do you put yours?
Red October1984
06-21-13, 06:15 PM
I put my drinks in the refrigerator.
How 'Bout You? (The Song that goes with my Question: How 'Bout You (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q7-Bhw3wBRs))
WernherVonTrapp
06-21-13, 08:09 PM
I drink mine.
Does a drink tell you what to do with it?
Red October1984
06-21-13, 09:11 PM
After you've had a few they might. I've never had that problem.
How much TV do you watch?
Jimbuna
06-22-13, 07:38 AM
Not as much as some.
What happens if you get scared half to death, ...twice?
Sailor Steve
06-22-13, 07:42 AM
Your enemies rejoice.
Would you rather have an enemie or an enema?
Feuer Frei!
06-22-13, 07:51 AM
Errm...
I'll take the obsolete spelling of Enemy.
Keep your friends close. Keep your enemies even....?
Sailor Steve
06-22-13, 08:19 AM
Errm...
I'll take the obsolete spelling of Enemy.
D'OH! :damn:
Actually the Middle English spelling was "enemi", but I wasn't thinking of that when I posted.
Keep your friends close. Keep your enemies even....?
...with the dirt beneath your feet.
Bath or shower?
mookiemookie
06-22-13, 08:54 AM
D'OH! :damn:
Actually the Middle English spelling was "enemi", but I wasn't thinking of that when I posted.
...with the dirt beneath your feet.
Bath or shower?
Shower. Who wants to sit in their own filth, surrounded by bacteria swimming around you and having sex with each other? Yeccch.
What's your death row last meal?
u crank
06-22-13, 09:36 AM
Something healthy. You never know...
Is there such a thing as a small deal?
BossMark
06-22-13, 10:50 AM
If you have a small pack of cards then yes
Do you play cards?
Spiced_Rum
06-22-13, 10:57 AM
A. Only poker, never win with tarrot.
Q. Is the King of Cups the owner of a bar?
No the Queen is.
What's with this death card, far to grim it is.
What new card would you create in place of the death card.
Spiced_Rum
06-22-13, 11:39 AM
A. The Human Resources administrator. They just add bureaucracy, do not appear to have a worthwhile function, and obtaining their help is like trying to get the Grim Reaper to change his mind. MAkes town hall and the tax office look benevolent.
Q. Which job has the least purpose?
Jimbuna
06-22-13, 11:46 AM
The one with the least pay.
What happens if you go on a survival course - and you don't pass?
Spiced_Rum
06-22-13, 11:50 AM
A. The rest of the course get to eat 'long pig' for dinner.
Q. Does survival of the fittest mean that supermodels would come top of the course?
Jimbuna
06-22-13, 11:58 AM
Only the muscular ones.
What happens when none of your bees wax?
Spiced_Rum
06-22-13, 12:05 PM
A. Their hairy legs collect more pollen.
Q. What SPF is there in snake oil?
Jimbuna
06-22-13, 12:39 PM
There are many...recently whilst on vacation in Turkey the wife started at 30 then dropped to 10 whilst I started at 50 then dropped to 30.
What happens when you swallow your pride?
Spiced_Rum
06-22-13, 12:44 PM
A. You are the last lion standing (or more likely slumped on the ground with a very full belly).
Q. Would you bet on a lion or a bear to win a fight?
Jimbuna
06-22-13, 12:52 PM
If it were against me...both.
What if hell really did freeze over? What would we be using instead?
WernherVonTrapp
06-22-13, 01:36 PM
Hell's Kitchen.
If you fart in church, do you sit in your own pew?
Spiced_Rum
06-22-13, 02:28 PM
A. My family could not afford to buy a pew, and it is better to fart near the alter when they give out the snacks so that several people could have passed the gas.:D
Q. Where is the font of knowledge?
Jimbuna
06-22-13, 03:16 PM
Inside my head.
What if someone died in the living room?
As long as they don't leave blood on the carpet it's OK.
Where to next?
WernherVonTrapp
06-22-13, 07:24 PM
We'll all have to move into the family room I guess.
Where do you hang the picture in a "Picture Window"?
Sailor Steve
06-22-13, 11:04 PM
You don't. You hang the window in the picture.
Can you picture it?
Red October1984
06-23-13, 12:06 AM
Picture? I can't even draw a straight line!
Who is your favorite actor/actress?
The Enigma
06-23-13, 06:05 AM
Kate Winslet
Do you like to whatch thunder storms?
Spiced_Rum
06-23-13, 06:19 AM
A. Yes, especially with sunglasses on to see the lightning forks. :cool:
Q. Why does lightning fork?
Because its forking incredible.
Can we start over?
Red October1984
06-23-13, 09:41 AM
Nope.
Should I do something productive?
WernherVonTrapp
06-23-13, 12:02 PM
:hmm2:Hmmm, that must mean posting here is unproductive.
Is posting here not productive?:D
Sailor Steve
06-23-13, 12:06 PM
Well, posting does produce something. We're not always sure what.
Why is today?
Jimbuna
06-23-13, 02:45 PM
Because it's the day before tomorrow.
What if the hokey pokey really is what it's all about?
frau kaleun
06-23-13, 03:44 PM
That would certainly turn things around.
Can you spin me right round baby right round like a record baby right round round round?
The Enigma
06-23-13, 03:44 PM
Then we are in deep trouble.
Is there a way out?
WernherVonTrapp
06-23-13, 04:11 PM
There's always a way out.
Are we there yet?
Spiced_Rum
06-23-13, 04:36 PM
A. Not yet, we are on the road to nowhere.
Q. How long is the road to hell.
WernherVonTrapp
06-23-13, 07:35 PM
Shorter, wider, and easier than the road I'm on.
What's the difference between a street and a road?
Spiced_Rum
06-24-13, 02:51 AM
A. In the US the streets tend to run east - west and avenues run north - south, but that does not explain roads. I was led to believe that a road became a street when inside a city/town. For example, the City of London, England, contains no Roads. There are plenty of Streets, Squares and Alleys, but traditionally not a single Road. The City of London is the old city, also known as the Square Mile. The sense of the word ‘road’ was not coined until the late 16th Century, after nearly all the thoroughfares in the ancient City had already been named.
The stretch known as Oxford Street is about a mile and a half long, this is one of the London’s oldest thoroughfares, following the line of an ancient Roman road that led to Colchester in the east and Hampshire in the west. Today, it’s also known as the A40. Within London, the A40 begins just north of St Paul’s, runs over Holborn Viaduct and along Holborn and New Oxford Street, along Oxford Street, then north to the Westway, Western Avenue and the M40, and thence on to Wales. Total length: 256 miles.
Q. What is the longest road in the world?
BossMark
06-24-13, 05:05 AM
The Pan-American Highway
What is the shortest road in the world?
Spiced_Rum
06-24-13, 05:37 AM
A. Ebenezer Place which is a street in Caithness, Scotland, is named the shortest street in the world by the Guinness Book of World Records. It measures just 6 feet 9 inches, and has only 1 address: a door to No. 1 Bistro, a restaurant in Mackays Hotel. It was built in 1884.
Q. Where is the widest street in the world?
Jimbuna
06-24-13, 06:10 AM
9 de Julio Avenue (or Avenida 9 de Julio, in the local tongue) in downtown Buenos Aires, Argentina.
http://www.amusingplanet.com/2012/06/9-de-julio-avenue-widest-street-in.html
What if you're in hell, and you're mad at someone, where do you tell them to go?
To heaven
What route you take, when you are in a hurry to the restroom?
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