Ship Sighted! (Balz)

Brag · 03-21-08, 10:24 AM

J.S. Balz writes:

Anyone with some time in the U-boat service is familiar with this. Days and days, sometimes weeks at a time, no bloody contacts. The sea is empty and the crew is about to go nuts. That is when the leadership of a great commander such as me is required.

Things were dead. There was no joy of listening on the hydrophone for the sweet melody of distant screws approaching. Only the waves roared as they crashed against my boat. The sea was empty.

To insure my crew knew they had a great commander, I lay on my bunk knitting a sweater. Yes! That's what I was doing. My mother sends me presents, but I can only collect the things when in port. Now, knitting a sweater requires great skill, especially when a great commander will be wearing it.

I use blue wool and red. Once the sweater is finished on the front of the sweater, in red letters it will display my name, Balz. On the back, YOUR GREAT COMMANDER, will be written in bold letters. This way my crew will know for sure they are being led by the great Balz.

From the conning tower came the shout, "Schiff gesichted!"

Fortunately Bernard was in his bunk, so I didn't have to listen to his lengthy and repetitious blather. A Kriegsmarine officer must be brief and to the point. You know, accurate. Repetition is a no-no in the Kriesgmarine. That's why I never repeat myself. Saying the same thing twice is repeating oneself. A great leader's speech should be brief and to the point. The more one talks, the less people understand and long winded explanations are the enemy of short and direct speech. A clear mind and staccato orders even in a pub are essential for clear thinking and being understood clearly.

So I put my knitting down and ordered, "Periscope depth."

Kptlt. Johan Sebastian Balz

Hanomag · 03-21-08, 10:37 AM

I want screenshots of the sweater!!!

Jimbuna · 03-21-08, 11:06 AM

Probably end up looking like this

SmokinTep · 03-21-08, 11:38 AM

:rotfl: :rotfl:

NealT · 03-21-08, 04:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jimbuna

Probably end up looking like this

With BALZ written all over the front?

Something would be WRONG with that picture!

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Subtype Zero · 03-21-08, 10:34 PM

I have to ask a question: Does this crew actually enjoy being led around by the Balz?

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Sailor Steve · 03-22-08, 12:59 AM

Read the reports from his various first mates. Otto Kalb seems to consider himself very lucky indeed that he survived long enough to get his own command. On the other hand, enlisted men don't have a choice. They go along with the farce or they crack up.

03-21-08, 10:24 AM	#1
Brag Navy Seal Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Docked on a Russian pond Posts: 7,072 Downloads: 2 Uploads: 0	Ship Sighted! (Balz) J.S. Balz writes: Anyone with some time in the U-boat service is familiar with this. Days and days, sometimes weeks at a time, no bloody contacts. The sea is empty and the crew is about to go nuts. That is when the leadership of a great commander such as me is required. Things were dead. There was no joy of listening on the hydrophone for the sweet melody of distant screws approaching. Only the waves roared as they crashed against my boat. The sea was empty. To insure my crew knew they had a great commander, I lay on my bunk knitting a sweater. Yes! That's what I was doing. My mother sends me presents, but I can only collect the things when in port. Now, knitting a sweater requires great skill, especially when a great commander will be wearing it. I use blue wool and red. Once the sweater is finished on the front of the sweater, in red letters it will display my name, Balz. On the back, YOUR GREAT COMMANDER, will be written in bold letters. This way my crew will know for sure they are being led by the great Balz. From the conning tower came the shout, "Schiff gesichted!" Fortunately Bernard was in his bunk, so I didn't have to listen to his lengthy and repetitious blather. A Kriegsmarine officer must be brief and to the point. You know, accurate. Repetition is a no-no in the Kriesgmarine. That's why I never repeat myself. Saying the same thing twice is repeating oneself. A great leader's speech should be brief and to the point. The more one talks, the less people understand and long winded explanations are the enemy of short and direct speech. A clear mind and staccato orders even in a pub are essential for clear thinking and being understood clearly. So I put my knitting down and ordered, "Periscope depth." Kptlt. Johan Sebastian Balz __________________ Espionage, adventure, suspense, are just a click away Click here to look inside Brag's book: Amazon.com: Kingmaker: Alexey Braguine: Books Order Kingmaker here: http://www.subsim.com/store.html For Tactics visit:http://www.freewebs.com/kielman/

03-21-08, 10:37 AM	#2
Hanomag Grey Wolf Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: LI NY Posts: 964 Downloads: 13 Uploads: 0	I want screenshots of the sweater!!! __________________ "Only if I can save first..."

03-21-08, 11:06 AM	#3
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 190,473 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Probably end up looking like this __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!

03-21-08, 10:34 PM	#6
Subtype Zero Lieutenant Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: 19,998 Leagues under the sea Posts: 262 Downloads: 7 Uploads: 0	I have to ask a question: Does this crew actually enjoy being led around by the Balz? :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl: __________________

03-22-08, 12:59 AM	#7
Sailor Steve Eternal Patrol Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: High in the mountains of Utah Posts: 50,369 Downloads: 745 Uploads: 249	Read the reports from his various first mates. Otto Kalb seems to consider himself very lucky indeed that he survived long enough to get his own command. On the other hand, enlisted men don't have a choice. They go along with the farce or they crack up. __________________ “Never do anything you can't take back.” —Rocky Russo

03-21-08, 11:38 AM	#4
SmokinTep Ace of the Deep Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Suffolk, Virginia Posts: 1,027 Downloads: 0 Uploads: 0	:rotfl: :rotfl: