In need of some personal advice - Page 2

HunterICX · 10-11-06, 12:00 PM

Lost a m8 because of that drugs sharing group thing

first he was a clean kiddo, a good friend of mine. but then he start to hang out with this group...he start smoking drinking and doing drugs. I told him to watch out but he also pulled the ''Mind you own ****ing bussines'' card. Well, he stop hanging around with me , saw him barelly till one night I was walking my dog through the parque, I saw that hanging group my m8 hangs out with they where walking laughing away, and I saw someone vommiting, It was my m8, I watched from an distance untill he lied on an bench , shaking like hell....I walked over to him and the first thing I said ''Is this what you wanted?'' he said to me to **** off but I stayed.., I said look man, if you call that laughing bunch of idiots ur friends you must be really stupid. again he said to **** off....well this time I walked away and said the following thing ''Ok man Suit yourself bye now''

saw him 3 months later, he had been clean for a month again except for the smoking ocasionly and he dumped that group. well it didnt repaired our friendship but at least it didnt destroy his body.

so watch out before thing start out of hand with your m8 rose
drugs are bad. they destroy more then the user knows.
even the smallest pleasure of drugs can end up in an nasty adiction.
and once youre in its hard to get out.

Bertgang · 10-11-06, 01:27 PM

I am the one who asked for "marriage help", my thanks to the whole community as I had excellent inputs.

Well, Rose, my two cents for you and your friend.

As young friend of a young man, you can't work like you were his mother or his psychologist; simply you haven't the age, the role, the experience and the moral authority to do so.

The best thing you can do for him, on my point of wiew, is to show that even his old lifestyle and friends have their appeal.
Don't search a direct, open comparison between the two groups, as you easyly could be the looser; simply give him the feeling that he's loosing lot of good things.

Time will say what will be his choice.

Rose · 10-11-06, 02:23 PM

Thanks alot for all the replies everyone

. There certainly are alot of varied answers out there. Some I agree with more than others...

SubSerpent, I think you are missing the point here. The thing is, I have gotten wasted with James a couple times... But that's not what we're all about. We just like talking, joking around, and hanging out. The point is that it's the people he's going to be with. They're sole purpose on the weekends is to get drunk/high and generally ****ed up. I don't want James to feel like he has to be that kind of person.

Also, I think it was Jumpy who said don't grow up too fast. Good advice, but that's not really what I was trying to get at. I mean, every couple months I'll get seriously schnockered (I'm trying to be original here... I think every other word for "drunk" has already been used on this thread). My first time in around February was by far the worst. I was projectile vomiting for two days... I was drinking pure, hard vodka... for four hours straight with my friends (not James). It was a real learning experience for me, and I almost hope he has a similar experience, although at the same time I really don't want anything bad like that to happen to him.

See, I drink/smoke only on occasion, and its never with the same one group. So its not a matter of growing up too fast. I think Bertgang hit the nail right on the head: it's literally a matter of which path he will choose -- me or them. I guess only time will tell. In the mean time, we'll just do the same normal things we've always done together. And Seth, I invited him out to Wisconsin over the summer (not quite the same as Aspen, but the same idea) so we'll see if he can come. I think just doing normal things will be good. Just like "old" times. Heh...

Once again, thanks for all of your support.

"Rose"

PS: Sorry about your mate Hunter... I just hope things don't get that out of hand with ol' James.

PPS: Camaeo, Mothballs -- I think if I told his parents I would never hear the end of it. Actually no... he would probably never speak to me again. I believe it's my responsibility to try and make things right. Even if all that entails is continuing to do the same old things with him, just to let him know what he's missing.

10-11-06, 04:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rose

Thanks alot for all the replies everyone

. There certainly are alot of varied answers out there. Some I agree with more than others...

SubSerpent, I think you are missing the point here. The thing is, I have gotten wasted with James a couple times... But that's not what we're all about. We just like talking, joking around, and hanging out. The point is that it's the people he's going to be with. They're sole purpose on the weekends is to get drunk/high and generally ****ed up. I don't want James to feel like he has to be that kind of person.

Also, I think it was Jumpy who said don't grow up too fast. Good advice, but that's not really what I was trying to get at. I mean, every couple months I'll get seriously schnockered (I'm trying to be original here... I think every other word for "drunk" has already been used on this thread). My first time in around February was by far the worst. I was projectile vomiting for two days... I was drinking pure, hard vodka... for four hours straight with my friends (not James). It was a real learning experience for me, and I almost hope he has a similar experience, although at the same time I really don't want anything bad like that to happen to him.

See, I drink/smoke only on occasion, and its never with the same one group. So its not a matter of growing up too fast. I think Bertgang hit the nail right on the head: it's literally a matter of which path he will choose -- me or them. I guess only time will tell. In the mean time, we'll just do the same normal things we've always done together. And Seth, I invited him out to Wisconsin over the summer (not quite the same as Aspen, but the same idea) so we'll see if he can come. I think just doing normal things will be good. Just like "old" times. Heh...

Once again, thanks for all of your support.

"Rose"

PS: Sorry about your mate Hunter... I just hope things don't get that out of hand with ol' James.

PPS: Camaeo, Mothballs -- I think if I told his parents I would never hear the end of it. Actually no... he would probably never speak to me again. I believe it's my responsibility to try and make things right. Even if all that entails is continuing to do the same old things with him, just to let him know what he's missing.

Well Rose it happens. Sometimes best friends grow apart for one reason or the other. All you can do is focus on you and do the best you can do at life. Don't EVER come off to him as being better than him or you will lose him forever and that's for sure. Let it be known that Rose is a cool cat and can have fun too without the drinking and drugs. I say, "Get in with the chicks"! It is a well known fact that dudes with chicks have lots of dude friends and vise versa for chicks with lots of chick friends get lots of dudes.

The problem with life (especially here in the States) is parents. I'm serious. You grow up always being told what you can't do and shouldn't do and this forces a lot of kids to rebel and look for grown up privledges to abuse - like drinking and drugs. Perhaps if laws and parents weren't so damned overcontrolling like they are, then kids like your friend wouldn't want to do this stuff so much.

Just do your thing and have fun with it and let him do his thing. If he doesn't learn or make the right choices then it will be his problem and you shouldn't feel guilty about it. He's given the same morals in life just as you are to make the right choices. If after all the horror stories and deaths of kids his age haven't been enough for him to stay away from this stuff then nothing will.

ASWnut101 · 10-11-06, 04:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SubSerpent

You do understand that the moment we're born is also the moment we begin to die, right?!?

sorry if i sound like an ass, but i think we start to die when we hit like 20 or so:p .....

but anyway, good advice everyone

CB.. · 10-11-06, 06:59 PM

your both 15, your getting "wasted", going skiing and visiting his country house.....you've unfortunately both got more money than sense...and that's the hard truth...save your money for medical/psychiatric treatment..you may well need it in the future.. both of you...
take a step back and try to evaluate what it is your trying to do...you have been conned into believing that this sort of behaviuor is adult..cool ..mature..and that in fact you need to get "wasted" etc in order to be cool....there are no such things as recreational drugs...all drugs come at a price...and i don't mean financial....

ping

TteFAboB · 10-11-06, 08:45 PM

Rose,

I had a PM headed to your box yesterday but my ISP choked up on a furball or something and I failed to send it. Ask Gizzmoe to check the Who's Online logs.

Now all I had to say has been covered by these people, so my words are superfluous and not needed anymore. Tough.

10-11-06, 12:00 PM	#16
HunterICX Rear Admiral Join Date: May 2006 Location: Malaga, España Posts: 10,750 Downloads: 8 Uploads: 0	Lost a m8 because of that drugs sharing group thing first he was a clean kiddo, a good friend of mine. but then he start to hang out with this group...he start smoking drinking and doing drugs. I told him to watch out but he also pulled the ''Mind you own **ing bussines'' card. Well, he stop hanging around with me , saw him barelly till one night I was walking my dog through the parque, I saw that hanging group my m8 hangs out with they where walking laughing away, and I saw someone vommiting, It was my m8, I watched from an distance untill he lied on an bench , shaking like hell....I walked over to him and the first thing I said ''Is this what you wanted?'' he said to me to off but I stayed.., I said look man, if you call that laughing bunch of idiots ur friends you must be really stupid. again he said to ** off....well this time I walked away and said the following thing ''Ok man Suit yourself bye now'' saw him 3 months later, he had been clean for a month again except for the smoking ocasionly and he dumped that group. well it didnt repaired our friendship but at least it didnt destroy his body. so watch out before thing start out of hand with your m8 rose drugs are bad. they destroy more then the user knows. even the smallest pleasure of drugs can end up in an nasty adiction. and once youre in its hard to get out. __________________

10-11-06, 02:23 PM	#18
Rose Grey Wolf Join Date: May 2006 Location: New York City Posts: 966 Downloads: 0 Uploads: 0	Thanks alot for all the replies everyone . There certainly are alot of varied answers out there. Some I agree with more than others... SubSerpent, I think you are missing the point here. The thing is, I have gotten wasted with James a couple times... But that's not what we're all about. We just like talking, joking around, and hanging out. The point is that it's the people he's going to be with. They're sole purpose on the weekends is to get drunk/high and generally ***ed up. I don't want James to feel like he has to be that kind of person. Also, I think it was Jumpy who said don't grow up too fast. Good advice, but that's not really what I was trying to get at. I mean, every couple months I'll get seriously schnockered (I'm trying to be original here... I think every other word for "drunk" has already been used on this thread). My first time in around February was by far the worst. I was projectile vomiting for two days... I was drinking pure, hard vodka... for four hours straight with my friends (not James). It was a real learning experience for me, and I almost hope he has a similar experience, although at the same time I really don't want anything bad like that to happen to him. See, I drink/smoke only on occasion, and its never with the same one group. So its not a matter of growing up too fast. I think Bertgang hit the nail right on the head: it's literally a matter of which path he will choose -- me or them. I guess only time will tell. In the mean time, we'll just do the same normal things we've always done together. And Seth, I invited him out to Wisconsin over the summer (not quite the same as Aspen, but the same idea) so we'll see if he can come. I think just doing normal things will be good. Just like "old" times. Heh... Once again, thanks for all of your support. "Rose" PS: Sorry about your mate Hunter... I just hope things don't get that out of hand with ol' James. PPS: Camaeo, Mothballs -- I think if I told his parents I would never hear the end of it. Actually no... he would probably never speak to me again. I believe it's my responsibility to try and make things right. Even if all that entails is continuing to do the same old things with him, just to let him know what he's missing. Last edited by Rose; 10-11-06 at 02:38 PM.*

10-11-06, 06:59 PM	#21
CB.. Ace of the Deep Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: UK Posts: 1,278 Downloads: 0 Uploads: 0	your both 15, your getting "wasted", going skiing and visiting his country house.....you've unfortunately both got more money than sense...and that's the hard truth...save your money for medical/psychiatric treatment..you may well need it in the future.. both of you... take a step back and try to evaluate what it is your trying to do...you have been conned into believing that this sort of behaviuor is adult..cool ..mature..and that in fact you need to get "wasted" etc in order to be cool....there are no such things as recreational drugs...all drugs come at a price...and i don't mean financial.... ping __________________ the world's tinyiest sh3 supermod- and other SH3/SH2 stuff http://www.ebort2.co.uk/ The best lack all conviction, while the worst Are full of passionate intensity. W.B.Yeats

10-11-06, 08:45 PM	#22
TteFAboB Admiral Join Date: Oct 2004 Posts: 2,247 Downloads: 4 Uploads: 0	Rose, I had a PM headed to your box yesterday but my ISP choked up on a furball or something and I failed to send it. Ask Gizzmoe to check the Who's Online logs. Now all I had to say has been covered by these people, so my words are superfluous and not needed anymore. Tough. __________________ "Tout ce qui est exagéré est insignifiant." ("All that is exaggerated is insignificant.") - Talleyrand

10-11-06, 01:27 PM	#17
Bertgang Sparky Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Italy Posts: 158 Downloads: 1 Uploads: 0	I am the one who asked for "marriage help", my thanks to the whole community as I had excellent inputs. Well, Rose, my two cents for you and your friend. As young friend of a young man, you can't work like you were his mother or his psychologist; simply you haven't the age, the role, the experience and the moral authority to do so. The best thing you can do for him, on my point of wiew, is to show that even his old lifestyle and friends have their appeal. Don't search a direct, open comparison between the two groups, as you easyly could be the looser; simply give him the feeling that he's loosing lot of good things. Time will say what will be his choice.