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SUBSIM: The Web's #1 resource for all submarine & naval simulations since 1997 |
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#1 |
Fleet Admiral
![]() Join Date: May 2011
Location: Leeds, West Yorkshire
Posts: 15,272
Downloads: 278
Uploads: 0
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Never trust the Tories look what Thatcher and Major did in the 80s and 90s and look what the wicked witch May is doing now doing now ![]() ![]() |
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#2 |
Kaiser Bill's batman
Join Date: May 2010
Location: AN72
Posts: 13,203
Downloads: 76
Uploads: 0
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#3 |
Chief of the Boat
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Ha! looks like an interesting period of moderation could be coming along shortly
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#4 |
Navy Seal
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wetty pants here reminded me when I sliped on ice in Ljubljana and fell flat on my back. When I got up I saw a shocked senior citizen, looked him right in the eyes and said: it happens to the best of us
And limped on And that one time I fell asleep on the train to Ljubljana and was awoken by a customs officer on the Croatian border. Luckily, that train was headed to Belgrade ![]() |
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#5 |
Chief of the Boat
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^
![]() I was also known as the milky bar kid because I would always ask for pop when visiting a 'tea spot' (a garage, shop or other business premises) ![]() |
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#6 |
Navy Seal
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I've been called the brick due to my shape and name.
And a lot of things by my mother that are not suitable for the forum. And there was that one company picnic where I said I'll jump in the river if I hear Alejandro again and as fate would have it, someone had a Lady Gaga Cd with him. And so I swam, underwear only infront of the entire company. Took me 4 years to loose the name Alejandro. And when I was in Rovinj, the designated driver trying to herd 3 drunk friends to the car. From all the catching and picking up people from the wet grass I looked like I thrown up all over me, did a #1 and #2 in my pants and went half a mile on my knees. And I was the only one sober ![]() |
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#7 |
Navy Seal
![]() Join Date: May 2007
Location: On a mighty quest for the Stick of Truth
Posts: 5,963
Downloads: 52
Uploads: 0
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No good deed goes unpunished...
I'm fueling my vehicle at a convenience store pump when a lady pulls up to the other side and proceeds to fumble around with the fueling equipment clearly at a loss in it's workings. So, like a good samaritan, I offer to assist. Unbeknownst to me the previous patron was lazy and had shoved their gas cap into the trigger. I pulled the nozzle from the pump and flipped the switch only to have gasoline come spewing forth in the direction of the lady, soaking her in gas from the neck down.
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#8 |
Still crazy as ever!
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: A little south of sanity
Posts: 3,375
Downloads: 180
Uploads: 1
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When i was seeing my girlfriend (now wife) for the second time I had a bad chesty cough. We were sat at her place drinking red wine and I had just taken a mouthful when, without warning, I coughed a spray of red wine all over her face, neck, coffee table and carpet. Fortunately she was ok about it and to my surprise even wanted to see me again! She still reminds me of it today.
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Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way... |
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#9 |
Navy Seal
![]() Join Date: May 2007
Location: On a mighty quest for the Stick of Truth
Posts: 5,963
Downloads: 52
Uploads: 0
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Tango has the right idea. Spit in her face right off the bat.
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#10 | ||
Gefallen Engel U-666
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"Only two things are infinite; The Universe and human squirrelyness?!! |
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#11 |
Sea Lord
![]() Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Somewhere else now
Posts: 1,739
Downloads: 825
Uploads: 4
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Let me have a go...
Next to my kids school there are 3 fast food joints, Nando's, MacDonalds and KFC. Every day when I pick him up he always bugs me to get a take away. I always say no. So one day, feeling daring, I say let's get a Big Mac - there are cheers from the crowd (1), and we 'whip' into the first drive through. Teller: "What would you like, sir" Me: "2 big Mac's, and two small fries, please" Teller: "Sorry sir, we don't do big macs" Me:"Come on, is it the wrong time of day or what - you do big Macs don't you ?" Teller: "No sir we don't do big mac's" Me: "Really! , may I ask why not ?" Teller:" This is KFC, MacDonalds is next door over there" Me: "£%^$%^$£^&$££" My kid never stopped laughing, within hours the whole family was having a go at me. ![]() ![]() ![]() |
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#12 | |
Navy Seal
![]() Join Date: May 2007
Location: On a mighty quest for the Stick of Truth
Posts: 5,963
Downloads: 52
Uploads: 0
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Quote:
What am I Where am I!? ![]()
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