The Special Snowflake in Desert: A Fallout 3 AAR

[Red October1984]

Originally Posted by Hottentot

I still remember it! He forced me to hold a gun! He said it was either that or he would beat me! Well okay, I'm not sure if he said that, but does it matter?! I mean, like, totally! A gun! Like he didn't know that guns are objects of boosting masculinity for those with inferiority complex and kill people and hurt animals and should totally be all banned!

It's going to be a loooooooonnnnnnnnggggg game for you sir. There's not a thing wrong with guns.

[Hottentot]

Originally Posted by Penguin

keep on with the great writing - the People's Front of Germany demands it!

I thought we were the German People's Front?

Originally Posted by Red October1984

This is going to be a long-ass thread

Originally Posted by Red October1984

It's going to be a loooooooonnnnnnnnggggg game for you sir.

Yes, thank you for repeating this invaluable piece of advice. I believe writing these stories on this forum for several years has given me some insight on the subject. But what would I know when just randomly starting something like this for, after all, I'm just a humble servant trying only my best to bring you some meager amount of amusement with my feeble, not mention-worthy capabilities.

I welcome comments in my AAR threads, but knowing there are people who have specifically said in the past that they are not commenting because they don't want to disturb the story, I also request that their wish is respected as well. I believe that's not unreasonable.

- - - - - - - - - -


My life continued. Daddy would keep playing doctor with me and say I wasn't allowed to play with boys without his approval, which I never got.




I kept asking if I could get a pony, but all he ever promised me was a goat on my 16th birthday.





On the way to get my new pet I remember meeting Butch and his gang oppressing Amata. Of course Amata wasn't very emancipated yet, even though I had lectured her about my political opinions for the last six years, but she was making process and not submitting to the obsolete gender hierarchy anymore like she used to.





Butch, on the other hand, was beyond all hope, despite of me telling him all the time that wearing leather jacket was highly unethical and some child somewhere had starved because of it plus some poor cow had lost its life for it too.





However, I knew how to play their opressive tendencies against them and with my quick wits and shining intelligence I made her leave Amata alone on that day.




So off I went again to get my goat, but imagine my horror when it occurred to me that daddy had lied to me and goat was, in fact, just some stupid test which I had to take to prove, like, the totally obvious fact that I was smarter than anyone here.




But since I was always a good student and totally smart, I decided to take this test too and write my essay about the modern theories of feminism.




But this test was very different from all the other exams I had taken during my courses. I mean, it had really weird questions, like this first one which was no question but a thinly veiled double entendre. I swear daddy has used that same phrase at least twice in the past with me.





Then they asked about sports, which I had always found boring. Like, the boys always talked about their oppressed girls and getting to the second base. Typical men who couldn't even hold up a conversation, changing subject in the middle of the sentence!





The questions got weirder and weirder. Like, first of all, I don't even have a grandmother and even if I did, I'm sure she wouldn't be republican enough to have a pistol, so I didn't answer that one.




I also resented how it encouraged reading masculine, unintellectual rubbish instead of Foucault's latest articles.




And how it implied what me and daddy had done in the restroom was just disgusting and I sure let the exam maker know what I thought about this particular question.




I wasn't really convinced of the scientific objectivity of this exam either and was sure to get bad grades just because I was a liberal thinking woman with globally conscious values.




And in retrospect it would have been much more convincing exam if they gave me a paper and pencil like everyone else in the first place. See the system in work!




Yeah, you don't say? So I was off to bed.

[Oberon]

Enjoying this one, Hottentot, fight the inequalities of post-apocalyptic 'merica!

[Hottentot]

The next thing I remember was someone screaming in my ear just as I was dreaming of my future, adopted and gender neutral children and thinking of proper names like "fox" and "wolf" for them.





I was still pretty pleasantly surprised to meet the person with whom I was planning to adopt them. Not that I'm going to tell secrets like that to you just yet.





However sh...err, I mean, the Person was very distressed and said daddy had gone somewhere without telling me. That was very unlike daddy. He usually said: "I'm going to the loo and come back in five minutes, so don't even think of running."





So Ama...um, the Person said I was in big trouble because apparently escaping from the Patriarchy was a huge sin and like in some backwater masculine fascist dictatorship they would then punish the kin too. That's me. So the Person told me I should escape too.


I was shocked about this! My daddy parent, after all these years, turned out to me a freedom fighter!





It was then that I understood that I should pack up my stuff and follow him into wherever he had went to help fighting the good fight against the tyranny of white heterosexual, meat eating, right wing males!





For emancipation!





Of course now that the truth was out, I wasn't popular anymore. Butch, in particular, had finally figured out what I told him right before that goat test and didn't want to be my friend anymore. It never occurred to him that he never was in the first place.





And of course the tyrannical police force of the place I was living in was also trying to take me again to the dark daddy room as soon as they found me.





But I wasn't going to listen to it! No more! Down with the thousands of years old traditions and established society structures!





I still have nightmares of that day, though! The place was full of bugs and I had to fight them off with my bare fists!





But even as pacifist as I am, I enjoyed giving some good slapping to the opressors that had kept me down for so many years now. It felt...liberating...





And after countless of bugs...





...giving the finger to the old Overseer who had tried making me the slave of his system...





...And a few more slaps for a good measure...





I finally found the secret tunnel that I was looking for. For freedom!





As I descended down the tunnel that had opened under the throne of the evil Overseer, a new thought crossed my mind.





I realized that I had lived for 18 years in here...without ever knowing that you could get out? I mean, no one ever told me about this huge metal door. Or what was behind it. It started occurring to me, that the world of which the books I had studied in school talked about, all that talk about global consciousness and fighting for universal suffrage...





...Wasn't actually talking about the metal corridors and the bright electrical lights I had learned to call the world for my whole life. As I approached the old door made of some weird, organic material, I realized that beyond is must have been something...





...Different.

- - - - -

(Yeah, sue me: couldn't resist posting a cliffhanger before tomorrow. )

[Takeda Shingen]

The TeamSpeak crowd told me I needed to stop by here and check this out. This is shaping up to be another brilliant work, and one that unsurprisingly goes over the heads of many. You're becoming an increasingly rare diamond in the rough here, Hott. Subscribed.

EDIT: And get your butt onto TeamSpeak and in ArmA.

EDIT 2: And trope use forgiven. Even Dante Aligheiri relied on cliché devices.

[Hottentot]

Originally Posted by Takeda Shingen

EDIT: And get your butt onto TeamSpeak and in ArmA.

Sir Yes Sir!

EDIT 2: And trope use forgiven. Even Dante Aligheiri relied on cliché devices.

Wait? You're saying there are other ways to tell stories?

- - - - - -


Ohmygod what's that?! The light! It burns! Turn it off, turn it off!!!





Oh...oh dear...





The world...it's so...big?





And empty? According to the books I've read, this kind of landscape is called desert. To create this kind of desert on this scale, you need no less than constant heat of 140 degrees Fahrenheit for at least two years with no more than 20 degree Fahrenheit deviation one way or another. Therefore this can only mean one thing...





...Eating meat really does cause global warming.





I have seen one of those in the books! It's called "H-O-U-S-E"! Some people live in those! Though the house I saw in the book was much prettier than this one. I can't fathom why anyone would live in a house like that. It must get very irritating to have all the dirty old men on the street staring at you when you are changing clothes.





That's a C-A-R! They can be used to D-R-I-V-E A-R-O-U-N-D, whatever that means! That's a fake car, though: real car has four wheels and this one obviously doesn't.





Oh-Em-Gee, what's that?! It's coming straight at me and I haven't ever seen a picture of anything like that! Does it bite?! What am I going to do!?





Err, hello?





Mr., Mrs. Or Ms. Flying Metal Thing That Plays Music?





Hey! Where are you going?! Didn't you hear me? No hablar English?





Well, it flew towards that big, bright ball far away and I can't catch it anyway. Perhaps it has a nest in there? I'll have to find out later! It'll be the next big leap of science! I'll be like that Darwin person who understood that the Malus domesticas gravitate towards the ground!

But that will have to wait. Right now I need a drink and I know that you can get one from those commercial capitalist machines in exchange for artificially valuable pieces of metal.





Huh? Why isn't there anything in there? I was told by the book you could always get one. And if not, you could complain. So I guess that's what I'm going to do then. It's good to be as learned as I am, you never run out of solutions!





My, someone should really get that pole off that car. My top-notch understanding of physics tells me that you can't move the mass of such machine from under the mass of such pole without external help. I'll be sure to enlighten the person I'm going to complain to about that too.





Okay, this house looks like it might have inhabitants. I'll go express them my deepest feeling of dissatisfaction and also make sure they are treating their animals and women well.

[Red October1984]

Originally Posted by Hottentot

I welcome comments in my AAR threads, but knowing there are people who have specifically said in the past that they are not commenting because they don't want to disturb the story, I also request that their wish is respected as well. I believe that's not unreasonable.

Sorry for disturbing your story. Please continue.

The questions got weirder and weirder. Like, first of all, I don't even have a grandmother and even if I did, I'm sure she wouldn't be republican enough to have a pistol, so I didn't answer that one.

That's hilarious right there.