Facepalm, or there's a little Bernard in all of us

[desirableroasted]

I share this only because only you people can understand...

New career, October 39, VIIB. I am in AN16, about 85 clicks due East of Scapa (wasn't going there, but to give you a position), heading N. Moderate visibility, but placid sea state. Middle of the night.

BdU informs me of a ship about 20 clicks NW, intersecting my path. We soon find her, a Large Merchant. Fired a magnetic-fused TII at 1000... but forgot to open the tube, so it hit aft of the engines. Had to deck-gun her.

While we were still submerged, though, Hydro-Hans noted a merchant traveling south about 9-11 clicks off. Once we got Large Merchant bedded down, we set out to see what we could find.

Still moderate visibility, but periodic hydrophone checks put us in a parallel path. I went to Flank, thinking I would pass, then cross over to her route, and see what she was.

But just as I order Flank, 1WO spots a warship, medium range, and has ordered the boat down before I can even get to the bridge. Go to silent running.

Pipe up.. a Southhampton! What's he doing up here? 1500 m and closing at 15 knts. And two Auxiliary Cruisers behind him, no escorts.

Quickly set up the shot on the Southhampton, this should be easy-peasy. Except... I forgot I changed my mind to go with an impact shot, and forgot to change the depth. Torpedo goes off on the other side, causing no discernible damage, but of course alerting him. Dammit, hard to starboard, snapshot..... oyyyy... forgot to open the tubes again. If the torp or the ship had had one more coat of paint on, we would have grazed her.

Fine, Southhamptons are not escorts, so he won't come after me. So let's do the Aux Cruisers? Well, we bang the first one by the book -- stopped her dead in the water. Turned to deal with the 2nd one. Perfect solution, fire -- except she is doing the AI panic dance, so as not to run into her sister, so the firing solution is borked. The torp ends up in the first AC, sinking her.

OK, bad night, but we can still maybe take on the 2nd Aux Cruiser as soon as a new torp is loaded..... except I am at silent running and everyone up front is playing poker.

Well, you might be thinking, so what? He bagged 25K in one night, despite being a bonehead. Folks do worse, right?

I put the game on pause... and then several hours later, rebooted without remembering to save first.

It didn't hurt bad, until you got to the reboot.
Ouch!

My last screw up took place after getting past a convoy's lead escort.
Wanted to Lock a distant ship, so I could enter the ID.
Hit the Fire button by mistake, and my last 3 torpedoes were gone with no hope of success.

[Missing Name]

I found a 2 Aux Cruiser convoy. Ahead flank... and completely forgot about the destroyer about 800 meters from my bow.

Needless to say, the cruisers got away.

[Obersteuermann]

Ugh, that's a helluva way to lose a good find!

I had something similar just now. April 44, north of Norway. I'm merrily sailing along through a stinker of a storm when the radio operator starts calling out contacts. One, two, four, eight ... there's loads of active radars about 10km out and closing pretty quick. OK, periscope depth, listen out. There's an entire armada coming up behind me. Thinking I might have been spotted by an aircraft or something, I dived deep and silent and lived to fight another day.

Six hours later BdU sent us a message: "All U-boats north of Norway are to seek and destroy enemy carrier and battleship task forces". Guess what I'd just dived away from...

[She-Wolf]

Hee, just call me Mrs Bernard, I was coming back down from the North, between Ireland and Britain and nothing much was happening, so I zoomed out so that I had a good picture of the map and could plot a course to get me a good bit further down south at maximum time compression. Sailing along, wheeee, hair blowing in the breeze, when suddenly, without any warnings, we're all dead, kaput, finito! EH? sez I to me and zoomed in to see what might have happened. I had run the sub into the Isle of Douglas, which is not visible when you zoom right out... dork!

[Bakkels]

Originally Posted by She-Wolf

Hee, just call me Mrs Bernard, I was coming back down from the North, between Ireland and Britain and nothing much was happening, so I zoomed out so that I had a good picture of the map and could plot a course to get me a good bit further down south at maximum time compression. Sailing along, wheeee, hair blowing in the breeze, when suddenly, without any warnings, we're all dead, kaput, finito! EH? sez I to me and zoomed in to see what might have happened. I had run the sub into the Isle of Douglas, which is not visible when you zoom right out... dork!

Had the exact same thing happen to me. (Twice, even) Passing north of Scapa Flow the north and plotting a straight course to the Rockall Banks. I don't know if its the same one as yours, but also on this course there's a tiny little island that only shows up when you zoom in. I survived both times though, but heavily damaged.

[ediko]

Originally Posted by desirableroasted

I share this only because only you people can understand...

What's that supposed to mean?

[Sailor Steve]

...there's a little Bernard in all of us...

That's the whole point. Bernard is just the poor schlub we blame for our own mistakes. I feel bad for him, considering all the goofs I blame him for.

[Jimbuna]

I guess we've all been there at some time or other....get Bernard to send you one of his special cocktails up to the bridge.

[desirableroasted]

Thank you all for the sympathy.

It's certainly not a game that rewards inattention, impatience or carelessness.

[Fish In The Water]

Originally Posted by ediko

What's that supposed to mean?

I think it means we've all had bad nights and can relate to the experience.

Originally Posted by desirableroasted

Thank you all for the sympathy.

It's certainly not a game that rewards inattention, impatience or carelessness.

Very true, but that's part of why I like it so much. It's sort of like the real sea, - panoramic, breathtaking and yet unforgiving at the same time. It simulates the total package.

[Gargamel]

BAH!! that'll teach you to use impacts in good weather!!



/ducks back into his cave for another 3 weeks.

[Kapt Z]

Ran into a small merchant in poor visibility. Had the shot all set up as she crossed my stern close enough to touch. Fire tube one! Tube one?!?!

AWWWW.....crap.

Forgot to chose tube five before firing.

[The Dean]

There was one time I decided to run my VIIC to Halifax and back. It was a long, tedious, uneventful trip. Snagged a couple small merchants within a day of port, but was still hungry and curious. Having traveled this far, I was going to see everything I could. I snuck into Halifax harbour, and decided it wasn't enough and tried creeping past the harbour up the river and around the backside. I felt like a strained father on a family vacation ("We paid good damn money to be here and we're going to enjoy it!")

So then I get bored and speed things up to about 16x. Then I notice I'm not moving. Then I notice the damage I'm sustaining. Then I notice I'm no longer submerged, but mostly out of the water and tilted 45 degrees skyward. I have mounted myself on a submerged submarine barrier. I'm undoubtedly all over the front page of the local papers tomorrow. "Schnapps-crazed captain tries to mate submarine with sub-net!"

[Missing Name]

I attacked a neutral convoy...