The Plight of the Single Man

[Mikey_Wolf]

Do you know, my night out with the lads last night really hammered home to me just what it means to be single. No matter where I looked, I saw couple everywhere. All my mates, have girlfriends. All the girls I ever get to know, have boyfriends, in short. I think I must be one of a dying breed, the single man.

I don't usually object to being single, in fact its sort of good, responsibility is cut in two pretty much. However, there is one thing wrong with me. I can talk to any man, hell, even men I don't like or whatever, I'll even have a scrap with two men at the same time... but, put a girl in front of me and say speak. And I struggle, its like I don't know what to do.

I have no luck at all with the girls. All the girls I've ever fancied either don't want to know, or, already have a boyfriend. Anyways, this is not me having a whine. But, I think if you are single nowadays you are a rarity. I could be wrong but, seems like everywhere you go you see couples. I have to confess I'm beginning to change my views now, and I think I would love to have a girlfriend.

[baggygreen]

Its lovely coming home from work and leaving the boss there. Course, as soon as you walk in the door you got another boss to please.

More single blokes than ladies in the world i believe, but you'd just be noticing it cos you feel you're missing out.

My advice? Dont stress it. If you do, you're only gonna make things worse for yourself. You seem young enough, you got plenty of time, no need to stress. besides, stressing will make you look desperate, and women can smell desperation from miles away. When you talk to em, dont look at them as potential partners, just friends to be made. Anything else will come after a friendship is established.

[The Munster]

Originally Posted by Mikey_Wolf

Do you know, my night out with the lads last night really hammered home to me just what it means to be single. No matter where I looked, I saw couple everywhere. All my mates, have girlfriends. All the girls I ever get to know, have boyfriends, in short. I think I must be one of a dying breed, the single man.

I don't usually object to being single, in fact its sort of good, responsibility is cut in two pretty much. However, there is one thing wrong with me. I can talk to any man, hell, even men I don't like or whatever, I'll even have a scrap with two men at the same time... but, put a girl in front of me and say speak. And I struggle, its like I don't know what to do.

I have no luck at all with the girls. All the girls I've ever fancied either don't want to know, or, already have a boyfriend. Anyways, this is not me having a whine. But, I think if you are single nowadays you are a rarity. I could be wrong but, seems like everywhere you go you see couples. I have to confess I'm beginning to change my views now, and I think I would love to have a girlfriend.

Well, you're not alone in this one. Well, you are but you know what I mean. Have found couples stand out more in Summer than any other Season, dunno why that is :hmm:
I wouldn't worry about it, if you're inclined to embark on a relationship then it's just a matter of time until you do

[JALU3]

Don't worry, once they hit their early 30's they start getting ancy, and start worring about their biological clocks and what not . . . afraid that they will die alone . . . then they will be more apt to a long-term relationship (maybe even marriage). However, the problem with that is . . . the "cream of the crop" will have already been taken off the market . . . well . . . you can't have everything

Whatever you do . . . don't settle. Find someone who you want to be with, and who wants to be with you (not what they make you become). They say that who you choose to wed, or be your hetero-life partner determine 90% of how happy you will be with the rest of yourt life.

[fatty]

On the other hand, you get to choose when to go to sleep, when to go out, when to stay in, what movie to see, how to spend your money, how long to play GWX, etc. etc. Relationships aren't all golden

[antikristuseke]

One can take comfort in the statistics that there are more women than men.

[Jimbuna]

Originally Posted by Mikey_Wolf

Do you know, my night out with the lads last night really hammered home to me just what it means to be single. No matter where I looked, I saw couple everywhere. All my mates, have girlfriends. All the girls I ever get to know, have boyfriends, in short. I think I must be one of a dying breed, the single man.

I don't usually object to being single, in fact its sort of good, responsibility is cut in two pretty much. However, there is one thing wrong with me. I can talk to any man, hell, even men I don't like or whatever, I'll even have a scrap with two men at the same time... but, put a girl in front of me and say speak. And I struggle, its like I don't know what to do.

I have no luck at all with the girls. All the girls I've ever fancied either don't want to know, or, already have a boyfriend. Anyways, this is not me having a whine. But, I think if you are single nowadays you are a rarity. I could be wrong but, seems like everywhere you go you see couples. I have to confess I'm beginning to change my views now, and I think I would love to have a girlfriend.

Hi Mikey

I remember a long while back (remember I'm 50 now) in those heady days of being young enough to experience a youthful hectic daily life. It was sometimes hard to keep all them balls in the air at the same time ie: drinking with the guys, hobbies, courting etc.
You know what ? Every time you had to give something up or sacrifice one priority for another.....What do you think was dropped ?
Courting....and what did I invariably start thinking for a while after ?
"I'll never find another girlfriend, I'll die old and lonely" yada yada yada
The plus side would be nights out with the guys on the drink and plenty of 'useless' advice...."There's plenty more fish in the sea"......"Your too young to be tied down"...."Come on out with us and we'll get blasted together"

There is always someone out there for everyone. Hell!! there's probably dozens of young women living in close proximity to you thinking similar thoughts.
If you are mindful to enter into a relationship it will happen as soon as you bump into your 'soul mate', believe me. I speak from personal experience.
There are too many women out there for there not to be a close match for you.
One of the secrets is.......don't rush in and make a mistake that could scar you for a long time. Be patient, choose carefully and enjoy the experience.
Most importantly of all........enjoy yourself in the meantime.

Good luck young sir.

All the best for the future

[kiwi_2005]

Originally Posted by jimbuna

Hi Mikey

I remember a long while back (remember I'm 50 now) in those heady days of being young enough to experience a youthful hectic daily life. It was sometimes hard to keep all them balls in the air at the same time ie: drinking with the guys, hobbies, courting etc.
You know what ? Every time you had to give something up or sacrifice one priority for another.....What do you think was dropped ?
Courting....and what did I invariably start thinking for a while after ?
"I'll never find another girlfriend, I'll die old and lonely" yada yada yada
The plus side would be nights out with the guys on the drink and plenty of 'useless' advice...."There's plenty more fish in the sea"......"Your too young to be tied down"...."Come on out with us and we'll get blasted together"

There is always someone out there for everyone. Hell!! there's probably dozens of young women living in close proximity to you thinking similar thoughts.
If you are mindful to enter into a relationship it will happen as soon as you bump into your 'soul mate', believe me. I speak from personal experience.
There are too many women out there for there not to be a close match for you.
One of the secrets is.......don't rush in and make a mistake that could scar you for a long time. Be patient, choose carefully and enjoy the experience.
Most importantly of all........enjoy yourself in the meantime.

Good luck young sir.

All the best for the future

I couldn't of said it better.

I just want to add. Keep ya zipper up mikey and wait till you find the right one, have fun but dont go jumping in bed with the first babe that gives you "that" look, if she gives you that look, my advice is to RUN!. Get to know her, be friends then move from there, might sound corny but wait till your married.

[Kapitan_Phillips]

Originally Posted by jimbuna

There is always someone out there for everyone. Hell!! there's probably dozens of young women living in close proximity to you thinking similar thoughts.
If you are mindful to enter into a relationship it will happen as soon as you bump into your 'soul mate', believe me. I speak from personal experience.
There are too many women out there for there not to be a close match for you.
One of the secrets is.......don't rush in and make a mistake that could scar you for a long time. Be patient, choose carefully and enjoy the experience.
Most importantly of all........enjoy yourself in the meantime.

Good luck young sir.

All the best for the future

Or maybe not quite in close proximity. Speaking from my experience

[Tchocky]

"I don't have a girlfriend, I just know a girl who'd be really mad if she heard me say that."

Ah, Mitch Hedberg

Now this is an interesting topic and one not addressed enough in my oppinion, especially amongst blokes. We're all "conditioned" to bite the lip and soldier on but the fact is that men/woman are social animals and we all like a bit of fluffy company now and again.

Sure when we're young we worry less about it because we have the whole world to explore but as we get older, a little calmer perhapps, we start feeling an urge to take things a little easier, settle down perhapps...who knows.

I've recently fallen into the same boat as the original poster, my own fault really as I keep popping off on mad adventures. The last one was crossing Greenland, took a month and got dumped as soon as I got back . I'm off again at the end of the month , this time for 2.5 months so I can sort of understand somebody not wanting to wait. Mind you, during the war people waited a lot longer....or did they :hmm:

Anyway, my advice, and i'm 42 so not sure its worth a great deal, is to carry on being you as that's what makes you unique. Who knows, maybe some of the posters here who say there is a "soul mate" for everyone out there are right, but even if not then you will eventually meet someone and things will sparkle. Just make sure you maintain a good social set so you can get out and about a bit....well they're not exactly gonna come knocking on your door out of the blue are they. The main thing is to be you and DONT TRY TOO HARD!!!

Another thing that i find a bit wierd is that most married blokes say its a pain in the ass and we should stay single. Most single blokes say its a pain in the ass and they would like to be coupled. I'm not sure if the married blokes are just saying that to cheer us single blokes up....I wish they didn't

And yet another thing that i find annoying is the way woman try to change us. I mean they like us when they meet us fo what we are, so we get together and then they do their damnest to change us. Eventually we change this and that, to keep the peace cos we like a quiet life, and then we get the famous "You're no longer the same person you were when I met you"........well thanks to you honey!!

Right, glad to get that off my chest, time to get back in my box.

[AVGWarhawk]

One basic thing you need to keep in mind is women like attention. I do not mean fan over me attention and worship the ground I tread on attention. (although it helps sometimes) They want someone to listen to them. Someone who is not judgmental. Just listening is about the best attention you can afford them. Often you will find them attracted to this then any physical attraction. I used to clam up around the ladies until I realized they are just people with ambitions and concerns like anyone else. Once you get a grasp on that, talking and befriending them is easy. The relationship will develop down the road. Not to worry, she will be along one day.

[seafarer]

I'm in my late forties, and single by choice. That's the way I like it. There is a lady I do see somewhat regularly, but I have no interest in either marriage nor co-habitation. Marriage has just never appealed to me, and I've never been interested in being a father either. I've done the living together routine for a few years, but much prefer living by myself in my own place. In part, I think it's just because I cannot get motivated to make the inevitable compromises that sharing a living space with someone entails. Just the way I roll, I guess.

If you want a realtionship, go for it. But don't ever apologize to society if you choose to remain single - though some people seem to want to make you feel you need to - never understood that

[HMCS]

There's nothing inherently wrong with being single- but if you think that having a regular woman is necessary for happiness (I think it's a result, not a prerequisite of happiness), then this is what I advise:

Go out and either:

1. Live through your passions. A happy, busy person is more likely to draw positive attention to oneself, and that means the opposite sex. Chicks dig confidence and positive energy. It's also a huge turn-off to the ones who are bad for you. If you come from a place of insecurity and lonliness, the only women you will connect with will be those at that emotional level. And that's never really a good thing; or a long-term solution.

OR....

2. Go out and make TONS of $$$. Women are not drawn to Hugh Hefner for his...sparkling personality. He's actually somewhat banal. But he has cash. Many, many women dig cash. And power.

[Kapitan]

Not alone mikey my one left me 6 months ago.