Subsim War on Spam II - Page 7

propbeanie · 05-20-17, 08:56 AM

Don't aggravate der kleine eichhörnchen... He'll turn that flammenwerfer your direction!!!

Onkel Neal · 01-18-21, 04:32 PM

UPDATE: Transmission intercept

.... in a dim, rusted metal-walled warehouse packed with work stations and beige computers in the sweltering Bombay heat, three swarthy young men in dirty, white business shirts and limp neckties gather around a gurgling water cooler...

"...did you hear? Pashhtek said he got a thread in Subsim past Jim and ucrank, it was there for 2 months."

"No sh^t?"

"Yeah, so he came back and edited the thread, inserting his essay link. It never made the thread pop up to the top, so it was super stealth, man!"

"s7rikeback didn't catch it? skidman?"

"No way, man."

You mean, it even got past aktungbby?"

"It did indeed."

"Yes! That's how a pro does it!"

"Yes! Yes!"

"It won't last," said a guy who was listening close by. The three turned to face this new guy.

"Why not? It has the links, it's buried on page 4, it's a success."

"No. And I tell you why. Every few days, the Onkel runs searches on the whole forum, by members with less than 50 posts, going back for years, and then exports the results as CSV. Then he imports them into a tool that can run searches for edited posts, for links in posts, and for specific key words --"

"--no!"

"Yes, I am afraid so."

"What key words?" gulped Pagoopda.

"Casino..." They all gasped. "Essays. Pharmacy. Prize. Potency".

They all looked at the floor. He finished in a whisper; "Even... Enhancement..."

"That bastard," Blenugh murmured. Slowly, they all drifted off to their workstations with sinking spirits.

Aktungbby · 01-18-21, 04:53 PM

Bloody ex-Raj wogs!

But ya left out... "

er spämmer"!

skidman · 01-18-21, 05:23 PM

Mr Quatro · 01-18-21, 05:59 PM

Neal for funniest post of the year for 2021, but hey it's still early yet

Aktungbby · 01-18-21, 07:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr Quatro

Neal for funniest post of the year for 2021, but hey it's still early yet

Quote:

"No sh^t?"

Quote:

Originally Posted by FAQ's

Please use language that you would use around your mother. No vulgarities, obscenities, hate speech, or foul language. Do not use *******ing w*rds with aster*cks, that's the same thing as vulgar languge.

Unfortunately it broke the

prime directive and used unmotherly lingo....'course he is a Texican

maybe he's 'leading from the front'...and technically it wasn't an "*'!

Commander Wallace · 01-18-21, 09:49 PM

Meanwhile, Martha, back at the ranch, Is laying in a ditch at the edge of town, having had a bit too much to drink, waiting for Sir Charles........

Mr Quatro · 01-18-21, 10:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Onkel Neal

UPDATE: Transmission intercept

.... in a dim, rusted metal-walled warehouse packed with work stations and beige computers in the sweltering Bombay heat, three swarthy young men in dirty, white business shirts and limp neckties gather around a gurgling water cooler...

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

"That bastard," Blenugh murmured. Slowly, they all drifted off to their workstations with sinking spirits.

I hope we don't have any Hindu's here

Quote:

The 33 Million Gods of Hinduism. Why Hindus worship so many gods and goddesses is a real mystery for most people. In the West, where the mass majority of people are part of the Abrahamic faith tradition with one God, the concept of polytheism is nothing more than fantasy or mythology worthy of comic book material.

PS I hope Sir Charles didn't do anything nasty to Martha

Commander Wallace · 01-19-21, 02:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr Quatro

PS I hope Sir Charles didn't do anything nasty to Martha

I'm not sure yet. I'm still writing.

I think Sir Charles was furious at Martha's pending nuptials and angry at being rejected, Sir Charles hit's Martha over the head with a blunt instrument, probably the dog. Sir Charles then hypnotizes Martha into thinking she is Britney Spears and does plastic Surgery on her so she looks like Britney spears, Including all the plastic. Sir Charles even gives Martha a terrible singing voice to make it all the more convincing.

I stopped writing there.

Either Sir Charles mails Martha to Las Vegas, postage due, in a trunk where she does 2 shows a night, 3 on Saturdays with a matinee or with all of Britney's / Martha's plastic, she has a Tupperware party.

I haven't decided yet and I'm still working on it. This is a common story and I'm sure it happens everyday

Catfish · 01-19-21, 03:01 AM

@Neal

^ Who is Sir Charles?

Commander Wallace · 01-19-21, 06:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Catfish

@Neal

^ Who is Sir Charles?

I suppose some explanation is due. When Neal did his update transmission post, the flamboyancy of his writing struck me and others as funny. For whatever reason, it reminded me of stories my great grandparents had told me of having dinner and then gathering around the big radio's to listen to the latest updates on WW2 and I'm guessing, WW1. This was of course before television.

As entertainment, there were also Melodrama's like the Shadow and comedy routines. When Neal did his shtick, I Immediately thought of that. As with melodrama's, the characters are exaggerated, usually in an absurd way.

Charles Schultz wrote the Peanuts gang, Charlie Brown and Snoopy comic strip. He frequently showed Snoopy on top of his doghouse behind a typewriter writing fictitious stories. Snoopy wrote in an exaggerated way as well.

David Ogden Stiers portrayed surgeon Charles Emerson Winchester. Mash was acclaimed as being both serious and also steeped in absurdity. Stiers did a fantastic job and interjected a lot of his personality into his role such as his love of Classical music.

I was also a fan of the English comedy Sitcom, As Time Goes By. It featured Judy Dench and Geoffrey Palmer.

The merging of these three gives us Sir Charles and Martha and serves as an inspiration.

It comes from the fertile imagination of yours truly and again, was meant to be completely absurd.

Catfish · 01-19-21, 08:01 AM

Ah thanks!

I thought it had something to do with the equally absurd book by John Hulme (wo does not exist) and his book "Die gesammelten Werke des Lord Charles" (~"The collected works of Lord Charles"), who (allegedly) is said to be an excentric Lord living in England, who collected german songs and rhymes, "translated" into english only by sound, like "How fine am bough mine cook-hook s'arse" which would be "Auf einem Baum ein Kuckuck saß".

It is presumably a fake name of some german, making fun of the english and german language.
Don't try to make sense of it

Commander Wallace · 01-19-21, 08:30 AM

^ I say ole bean, think you've got it.

Moonlight · 01-19-21, 08:56 AM

^No he bloody hasn't, I would like to inform you that the real Lord Charles is a highly respected member of the British establishment, apart from when he's drunk, which unfortunately for everyone else is every hour of every day.

Eichhörnchen · 01-19-21, 09:47 AM

Always loved Lord Charles, what?

05-20-17, 08:56 AM	#91
propbeanie CTD - it's not just a job Join Date: May 2016 Location: One hour from Music City USA! Posts: 9,743 Downloads: 439 Uploads: 2	Don't aggravate der kleine eichhörnchen... He'll turn that flammenwerfer your direction!!! __________________ "...and bollocks to the naysayer/s" - Jimbuna

01-18-21, 04:53 PM	#93
Aktungbby Gefallen Engel U-666 Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: On a tilted, overheated, overpopulated spinning mudball on Collision course with Andromeda Galaxy Posts: 27,853 Downloads: 22 Uploads: 0	Bloody ex-Raj wogs! But ya left out... "er spämmer"! __________________ "Only two things are infinite; The Universe and human squirrelyness; and I'm not too sure about the Universe"

01-18-21, 05:23 PM	#94
skidman Ace of the Deep Join Date: Dec 2012 Location: Near the Dutch mountains Posts: 1,147 Downloads: 85 Uploads: 0	__________________ "In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.” (Douglas Adams)

01-18-21, 05:59 PM	#95
Mr Quatro Navy Seal Join Date: May 2013 Posts: 6,772 Downloads: 0 Uploads: 0	Neal for funniest post of the year for 2021, but hey it's still early yet __________________ pla•teau noun a relatively stable level, period, or condition a level of attainment or achievement Lord help me get to the next plateau ..

01-19-21, 03:01 AM	#100
Catfish Dipped Squirrel Operative Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: ..where the ocean meets the sky Posts: 16,897 Downloads: 38 Uploads: 0	@Neal ^ Who is Sir Charles? __________________ >^..^<*)))>{ All generalizations are wrong.

01-18-21, 04:32 PM	#92
Onkel Neal Born to Run Silent Join Date: Jan 1997 Location: Cougar Trap, Texas Posts: 21,284 Downloads: 534 Uploads: 224	UPDATE: Transmission intercept .... in a dim, rusted metal-walled warehouse packed with work stations and beige computers in the sweltering Bombay heat, three swarthy young men in dirty, white business shirts and limp neckties gather around a gurgling water cooler... "...did you hear? Pashhtek said he got a thread in Subsim past Jim and ucrank, it was there for 2 months." "No sh^t?" "Yeah, so he came back and edited the thread, inserting his essay link. It never made the thread pop up to the top, so it was super stealth, man!" "s7rikeback didn't catch it? skidman?" "No way, man." You mean, it even got past aktungbby?" "It did indeed." "Yes! That's how a pro does it!" "Yes! Yes!" "It won't last," said a guy who was listening close by. The three turned to face this new guy. "Why not? It has the links, it's buried on page 4, it's a success." "No. And I tell you why. Every few days, the Onkel runs searches on the whole forum, by members with less than 50 posts, going back for years, and then exports the results as CSV. Then he imports them into a tool that can run searches for edited posts, for links in posts, and for specific key words --" "--no!" "Yes, I am afraid so." "What key words?" gulped Pagoopda. "Casino..." They all gasped. "Essays. Pharmacy. Prize. Potency". They all looked at the floor. He finished in a whisper; "Even... Enhancement..." "That bastard," Blenugh murmured. Slowly, they all drifted off to their workstations with sinking spirits.

01-18-21, 09:49 PM	#97
Commander Wallace Navy Seal Join Date: Oct 2012 Location: Under the sea in an Octupus garden in the shade Posts: 5,017 Downloads: 360 Uploads: 0	Meanwhile, Martha, back at the ranch, Is laying in a ditch at the edge of town, having had a bit too much to drink, waiting for Sir Charles........

01-19-21, 08:01 AM	#102
Catfish Dipped Squirrel Operative Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: ..where the ocean meets the sky Posts: 16,897 Downloads: 38 Uploads: 0	Ah thanks! I thought it had something to do with the equally absurd book by John Hulme (wo does not exist) and his book "Die gesammelten Werke des Lord Charles" (~"The collected works of Lord Charles"), who (allegedly) is said to be an excentric Lord living in England, who collected german songs and rhymes, "translated" into english only by sound, like "How fine am bough mine cook-hook s'arse" which would be "Auf einem Baum ein Kuckuck saß". It is presumably a fake name of some german, making fun of the english and german language. Don't try to make sense of it __________________ >^..^<*)))>{ All generalizations are wrong.

01-19-21, 08:30 AM	#103
Commander Wallace Navy Seal Join Date: Oct 2012 Location: Under the sea in an Octupus garden in the shade Posts: 5,017 Downloads: 360 Uploads: 0	^ I say ole bean, think you've got it.

01-19-21, 08:56 AM	#104
Moonlight Admiral Join Date: Dec 2010 Location: Fookhall Copse Posts: 2,133 Downloads: 184 Uploads: 0	^No he bloody hasn't, I would like to inform you that the real Lord Charles is a highly respected member of the British establishment, apart from when he's drunk, which unfortunately for everyone else is every hour of every day. __________________

01-19-21, 09:47 AM	#105
Eichhörnchen Starte das Auto Join Date: Aug 2014 Location: The Fens Posts: 15,745 Downloads: 5 Uploads: 0	Always loved Lord Charles, what? __________________