Bad News

[THE_MASK]

I hope everything turns out ok , cheers sober out .

[Magic1111]

Originally Posted by Feuer Frei!

Hallo Thomas,
wie geht's?
Viele Grüße.

Hi !

Ich möchte Dir für heute noch etwas mit auf dem Weg geben: Meine Mutter (auch Christin) erkrankte 2000 an Brustkrebs, gilt heute als geheilt. Damals gab ihr u.a. diese Bibelstelle viel Halt (evtl. kennst Du sie ja):

Wir wissen aber, dass denen, die Gott lieben, alle Dinge zum Besten dienen ... (Römer 8,28)

Und Gott sagt hier: "...ALLE Dinge..."

In diesem Sinne viele liebe Grüße,

Thomas

[Growler]

FF -

You WILL survive this.

Once in awhile, all of us are confronted with our own human frailties, directly or indirectly. Some people fold, others step up. You've already stepped up.

By the sound of it, you have three of the best reasons I can think of for a man to step up. You are fighting for your daughters, your family... and, when it's all said and done, you fight for yourself.

Now the bad news. I know it's a habit, a stress-response, a nerve-soother, but you must QUIT SMOKING. RIGHT NOW. This is YOUR LIFE you're fighting for - if you're going to beat this thing, start right now. Not later today. Not in a week. Right bloody now. As you go into chemo, your immune system is going to get brutalized as it is. End of lecture.

With immune system in mind - consult your doctor about taking L. Acidophilus and other good intestinal bacteria, as the drugs you'll be taking will wipe them all out and leave you vulnerable to stomach and digestive complaints. It's a little thing, but it can make eating (when you have to) a little easier to do. Learn about neutropenia, and some things you can do to ease that discomfort.

You probably already know all this stuff; sorry... Your post plugged me into my "Defend my friends" mode.

You WILL survive this, and your life will be forever changed by it. I'm proud to know you, honored to call you a colleague, and humbled by your candor and honesty in facing this fight.

My best wishes and hopes are with you and your family.

[TarJak]

Sorry to hear about your news FF. Hope everything goes OK for you. Don't give up and fight hard mate.

[Feuer Frei!]

Originally Posted by Growler

FF -

You WILL survive this.

Once in awhile, all of us are confronted with our own human frailties, directly or indirectly. Some people fold, others step up. You've already stepped up.

My best friend told me the other day something similar:
He said that we all face death at some stage in our lives, it is what decisions we make and what really is important to us. That we can make the right decisions. Some people face death without warning and they do not get a chance to make these decisions of what is most important to us in that time.
Others' like me have a choice and time to still make those decisions and prepare ourselves to fight it and beat it.
I can take heart from that, since i have some warning. Others are much less fortunate than me.

By the sound of it, you have three of the best reasons I can think of for a man to step up. You are fighting for your daughters, your family... and, when it's all said and done, you fight for yourself.

Absolutely! The 3 only reasons. You know, that is what will get me through this in the end. My 3 girls will give me the strength to fight and beat this. From them i will draw strength.
I will see my eldest, who is 8, this weekend to spend some time with her. I was originally thinking of not telling her that Dad is sick and what that sickness will eventually do my physical state. And mental state.
But, with the advice of my best friend and her mother i have decided to tell her a little about my condition.
She will ask questions, down the track of course, she is incredibly smart for her age and very perceptive.
I am currently teaching her German and oh boy does she pick that up well.
She astounded me the other week when, since the week before when i tought her some basic words, out of the blue, without warning she started to say these german words to me, with perfect pronunciation.
It surprised me and amazed me so. I was a little emotional and gave her praise.
So i will tell her about the future, short-term future, when Dad may not have any hair, why that is, and when Dad is too tired to run around with her or if Dad is not feeling well etc.
She will understand, not fully of course but i will not underestimate her powers of perception and understanding.
I think she is entitled to know.
My other 2 girls are too young to understand.
But they are all 3 in my heart and i will draw energy and strength from them, whilst i go through this. It will help me immensely, i have already conditioned myself to do this.
Anything that will help me.

Now the bad news. I know it's a habit, a stress-response, a nerve-soother, but you must QUIT SMOKING. RIGHT NOW. This is YOUR LIFE you're fighting for - if you're going to beat this thing, start right now. Not later today. Not in a week. Right bloody now. As you go into chemo, your immune system is going to get brutalized as it is. End of lecture.

This is another thing i have to work on, i know that. And i dare say that they will ask me to stop anyway, i have heard that they will not do chemo if you smoke.
But advice duly noted, i am already resigning myself to the fact that, certainly during the chemo stage, hopefully only for the 3 mths that i will not be smoking. Whilst my system is undergoing that hammering.
And probably 3 mths after that to recouperate. So, at least 6 mths of no smoking.
I am gearing up for that.

With immune system in mind - consult your doctor about taking L. Acidophilus and other good intestinal bacteria, as the drugs you'll be taking will wipe them all out and leave you vulnerable to stomach and digestive complaints. It's a little thing, but it can make eating (when you have to) a little easier to do. Learn about neutropenia, and some things you can do to ease that discomfort.

Duly noted, and added to my list of questions i have already written down for the oncologist.
They have advised me that i will be consulted by a dietician, to help monitor my system and my weight during chemo.

You probably already know all this stuff; sorry... Your post plugged me into my "Defend my friends" mode.

You WILL survive this, and your life will be forever changed by it. I'm proud to know you, honored to call you a colleague, and humbled by your candor and honesty in facing this fight.

My best wishes and hopes are with you and your family.

Thank you, i appreciate your time and effort in posting this to me, i am greatful for your kind words and also your advice as well.

Each time i check this thread i am emotional and i get a warm feeling in my heart for all the kind comments and well wishes from everybody. The advice and prayers and positive thoughts are very much appreciated. It takes something like this to realise that you SUBSIM members are indeed a great bunch of people and you all seem incredibly genuine and caring people.
It is a shame that i will probably never ever meet any of you but by God, i feel that some of you i have known you for a long time and who knows, maybe someday there will be a SUBSIM meet in the land of kangaroos and wallabies and i get to meet you all and we will have some laughs and down some amber ale!
And i will be able to thank you all for your continued words of encouragement and greetings of hope and fighting spirit.

[Schroeder]

Ich kann nichts mehr hinzufügen, was nicht schon gesagt worden wäre. Ich wünsche dir viel Glück und ein schnelle Genesung.

[RickC Sniper]

F.F

It saddens me to hear this news but please be upbeat and know that it can have a great outcome.

My son had testicular cancer in his early 30's. Because it was noticed early his treatment was quite a bit simpler than yours. He lost the testicle and underwent radiation. That was over 5 years ago.

He smoked like a steam engine the whole time regardless of how much encouragement he had to quit. Regardless of the type of cancer smoking ALWAYS makes treatment less effective.

I am a religious man and I will pray for you, that you beat this beast and also pray that you have the will to stop smoking. (which might turn out to be the most difficult.)

[Feuer Frei!]

Originally Posted by Schroeder

Ich kann nichts mehr hinzufügen, was nicht schon gesagt worden wäre. Ich wünsche dir viel Glück und ein schnelle Genesung.

Danke Schroeder,

Originally Posted by RickC Sniper

F.F

It saddens me to hear this news but please be upbeat and know that it can have a great outcome.

My son had testicular cancer in his early 30's. Because it was noticed early his treatment was quite a bit simpler than yours. He lost the testicle and underwent radiation. That was over 5 years ago.

He smoked like a steam engine the whole time regardless of how much encouragement he had to quit. Regardless of the type of cancer smoking ALWAYS makes treatment less effective.

I am a religious man and I will pray for you, that you beat this beast and also pray that you have the will to stop smoking. (which might turn out to be the most difficult.)

Thank you RickC Sniper, i will give up smoking. Even if it's just during the chemo and the recoup time afterwards. I am going to need all my strength and every little bit of immunity that i can retain. Smoking will not help. I have acknowledged that and i would be a fool to smoke whilst this is going on.

Update:
Oncology rang me about half an hour ago, the appointment date is set: 27th of July (next Wednesday) 15:30.
Dam! Another 5 days. I am impatient. I want this to start sooner than later. This waiting around does not help the thought processes.

[joea]

Oh how the hell did I miss this? I am really sory to here that FF and I hope you get well. It's going to be a tough road but as far as we can over this virtual medium we will support you.

[Feuer Frei!]

Originally Posted by joea

Oh how the hell did I miss this? I am really sory to here that FF and I hope you get well. It's going to be a tough road but as far as we can over this virtual medium we will support you.

Thanks joea, i appreciate you showing your support.
I am going to know more, a lot more after next wednesday which is when i meet with the Oncologist.
I'll know how long the initial treatment will be for.
I just want to get this all started. I think after Wednesday i will feel a little better, knowing full well what is ahead of me. Rather than just what's on the patient fact sheet and second hand info.
Specific info, rather than general info, is what i am after.

[Growler]

Until Wednesday, my friend, sit back, take a deep breath, and relax as best you can.

There will be plenty to stress over in the coming weeks and months. For now, though, the best thing you can do for yourself is to let it go for a few days.

[Rockstar]

I was diagnosed with Melanoma several years back. I went in for my usual skin check, they hacked off a suspect skin sample and sent it in for biopsy. I get a call from my Dermatologist four days later on a Saturday of all days waking me at 7AM. Nothing to worry about she says but by the way she was saying it told a different story, horribly bedside manners.

Four days before I could get into surgery to have it completely removed and another 4 days for that biopsy report.

But that waiting. I was a nervous, ill tempered wreck the whole time.

It is no doubt difficult to get on with routine. But I second what Growler said, sit tight and take care of yourself first everything else is second. You can beat this.

Having been through this with someone I hope you don't mind the unsolicited intel.

Keep doing what you're doing research everything you can about this. It will help you to ask the doctors the right in-depth questions. It is important to write it all down take it with you.

When you start taking chemo try to have someone go with you to the doctors as well. There is a phenomena called 'chemo-brain'. Which MAY affect your speech and memory to a degree making it somewhat difficult and frustrating for you to ask questions and understand answers. Your doctor should be looking for this, ours did, an inability to put sentences together and or slurred speech is a sure give away to the care taker. Memory and speech will improve after treatment.

My wife was in a clinical trial so the type of chemo and dosage was not discussed. When asked how much the doctors only said she was getting both barrels we seemed to sense it was more than anyone had ever received before. Chemo takes on the fast growing cancer cells and unfortunately other fast growing cells like the ones in your nervous system too.

So be aware you may feel numbness in your extremities. This MAY lead to permanent damage in the long run. Like chemo brain it's something you need to keep your doctor and care taker informed of.

My wife was scheduled for a round of six chemo injections. She could only take four out of the six, she was ready to quit on the third but I pressed to do one more. She did suffer from nerve damage but has since recovered and leads a normal life.

Keep away from others with the flu or common colds. If you catch it they might suspend treatment until you get over it. Also the immune boosters my wife got to help build white cell count seemed to make her feel worse than the chemical therapy did.

This was about it as far as treatment went. The rest was up to her, diet, attitude, not letting it or anyone affect her life's routine (like swimming). We got very close during time though we weren't married yet. After treatment we sold everything, hopped on a sailboat and cruised for the last 6 or 7 years now. Life changed for us both. We don't work like other enduring that 9 to 5 rat race fighting to obtain the possessions we are told we must have. We don't even own a home just a 44 sailboat and two dogs. We found life is short as it is so we set out to enjoy it.

When you kick this cancers arse as I suspect and earnestly pray you will. Maybe I'll run into a boat named Feuer Frei! in the Caribbean. See you in Grenada!

[Feuer Frei!]

Originally Posted by Rockstar

It is no doubt difficult to get on with routine. But I second what Growler said, sit tight and take care of yourself first everything else is second.

Indeed. I have been teaching and prepping my mind to prioritize what's important. And what is not.
What is not important right now is that i resigned from my job, what is not important is that i will face financial difficulties. What is not important is all the material B.S. and what people will think of my appearance, whilst going through chemo.
What is important is to stay positive. What is important is to think of my 3 girls (daughters). What is important is to arm myself with whatever info i can obtain before the appointment on Wednesday with the Oncologist, and like you said, have questions at the ready.
Which i have already started. A list of questions has been begun, with more to be added, i am sure.

Having been through this with someone I hope you don't mind the unsolicited intel.

Not at all. Infact it is welcome.

When you start taking chemo try to have someone go with you to the doctors as well. There is a phenomena called 'chemo-brain'. Which MAY affect your speech and memory to a degree making it somewhat difficult and frustrating for you to ask questions and understand answers. Your doctor should be looking for this, ours did, an inability to put sentences together and or slurred speech is a sure give away to the care taker. Memory and speech will improve after treatment.

Oh boy. Something i wasn't aware of. Duly noted on my list of questions. Thanks.

So be aware you may feel numbness in your extremities. This MAY lead to permanent damage in the long run. Like chemo brain it's something you need to keep your doctor and care taker informed of.

Duly noted as well. And more to stress about.

My wife was scheduled for a round of six chemo injections. She could only take four out of the six, she was ready to quit on the third but I pressed to do one more. She did suffer from nerve damage but has since recovered and leads a normal life.

This relates to the numbness in your extremeties that you referred to? Or this is something entirely seperate?
Again, duly noted down.

I've had a look at the patient fact sheet from the hospital, which i linked to earlier on in this thread, and perused, in detail the side effects of chemo.
Now i assume that they are general side effects, since every person's system reacts differently to chemo.
May i ask politely if your Wife underwent any or most or all of those side effects whilst going through chemo?
The fact sheet is here:
https://www.eviq.org.au/LinkClick.as...s%3d&tabid=156

I'm curious as to wether the side effects described are a possibility, or if they all happen to every patient, or if the side effects may occur, if so, how many of them, how frequently, ie daily, weekly, hourly etc etc.
Thanks for keeping this thread alive, and helping me keep my hope intact and to stay on a positive path.

[Rockstar]

Sorry, She was beginning to feel slight discomfort in her left side after the first treatment but it soon subside after a day or two. As it went on though the discomfort increased and took longer and longer to go away.

She's a strong women both physically and mentally but it was taking a terrible toll on her. By the third round, she was ready to quit. I was the one who convinced her to take a fourth. It was that fourth which put the discomfort and damage over the top. According to her there was 'something really wrong' after that one.

Being in a clinical trial the doctors could not help with decisions or recommendations, they were simply observers. But when the day came to visit the doctors to tell them she couldn't endure anymore. Hearing her symptoms and complaint they did their best to tell us without interfering in the trial she was making the right decision. It was without a doubt, time to quit and helped us both immensely with knowing she made the right decision. But it took 6 to 8 months for the nerve damage to even start getting back to normal.

The severity of what she went through should only be looked upon as an individual case and not as general symptoms for everyone. It had much to do with the type cancer, chemotherapy, radiation and dosage. We met many other patients in support groups who had gone through or were going though treatments but each varied in symptoms.

I would be more than happy to go over the fact sheet. But could not open it.



.

[Oberon]

It's hard to know what to say in a situation like this, so I will just say that I'll be rooting for you and keep fighting, like Growler says, you've got the three best things to fight for.