What do you tell the wife? - Page 4

d@rk51d3 · 11-20-07, 02:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BootsmanBoof

Just live on bugger-all sleep like I do. Kids in bed, wife ditto, crack open SH3+GWX and do a patrol. To the end, even if it takes 3 hours

. Turn up to work next day feeling groggy and sleep deprived, but at the same time satisfied with a good bucketload of tonnage

A story I only know too well.

stinger503 · 11-20-07, 05:24 PM

My fiancee doesn't seem to realise that I can TALK while I play SHIV! Although I get back at her in my own special way: I tell her every detail about my partol thus far. It bugs her, so my mission is accomplished.

-Pv- · 11-21-07, 12:46 AM

Wives want 100% of our time. It's how they are made. Anything less and to them, it's as if we are cheating on them. Giving them second best. I can relate many stories of how gaming addiction has ruined marriages among people I know. The non-carreer wives (are there any left?) must realize the 5 hours of soaps during house chores are a lot like taking out the garbage between contact reports. Both endevours are a way of participating in fantacy, just with a different focus. For women, social activities bring the most satisfaction. For guys, we are more isolationist. Women want to be in the "in" circle of movers and shakers, knowing everything about everyone and everyone their friends know. Men want to be the mysterious masked hero riding out of the sun and back out into the haze. Not everyone has the same mix of the two, but in general these are devisive tendencies all by themselves. If you have wife and kids, gaming must take a seat in the back of the bus.
-Pv-

d@rk51d3 · 11-21-07, 02:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by -Pv-

If you have wife and kids, gaming must take a seat in the back of the bus.
-Pv-

Good Idea. The back seat of the bus is the biggest.

:rotfl:

captiandon · 11-21-07, 06:14 AM

I for one am very lucky. I drive truck and If I were married, which I am not, I am to far away from home all the time. I play it every time I am at a Shipper or reciver loading and unloading ( We dont Unload our own freight). When I am at home playing games is basicly all I do.... Humm, Must be why I am not married.
I decided along time ago that I wasnt going to get married and being an OTR truck driver it seems to work out, All thought I dont have anyone at home to run arends for me and its hard to get anything done for myself otherwise. Good thing is I live with Family when I am not on the road, which is 8 to 10 days a month.

longam · 11-21-07, 09:43 AM

Considering I work at the same place as my wife does and were both in management we get to see each other most of the day. Then when we both arrive at home we spend an hour or so talking about the day then were ready to get away from each other and do our own thing. Works out great!

Chock · 11-21-07, 09:54 AM

I'll be playing around sub sims whilst sat on a train to London very shortly, so there's no way I can be interrupted by my missus for at least four hours there

Funnily enough, she just summed all that up a moment ago, when I was messing around with the scale model Akula I'm currently building, with the words: 'Shift your toy submarine':rotfl: which I suppose it is when you get right down to it.

To be fair, her interests (dog showing) probably encroach more on my stuff than the other way around. Give and take is the answer to a happy marriage, she drags me to Crufts and other dog shows (which bores me to death), I force her to crawl around inside preserved submarines and come flying with me in decrepit old biplanes. Actually that got her back really well once - you should have seen the look on her face when I told her (once we were up in the air) that the plane we were flying was built 70 years ago :rotfl:

Chock

leovampire · 11-21-07, 07:11 PM

They use their noses and lift my arm up off of the mouse and or keyboard. If I don't respond fast enough then they double team me one does the right arm the other does the left arm.

How can you refuse that?! :rotfl: :rotfl:

Got to love their way of thinking a problem out in getting Daddy's attention.

minsc_tdp · 11-21-07, 07:49 PM

Minsc's List for Successful Gaming/Relationship Harmony

You have to sit down talk. Explain that agreement must be made on all of the following:

1.) You need these games for your relaxation and mental health. We can't all be "bettering ourselves" 100% of the time. Downtime is needed.
2.) It's not your fault if she's bored and has nothing to do while you play. Find friends. Get your own hobby. Whatever it is, do it elsewhere because your hobby requires isolation and zero disturbance.
3.) She absolutely should not guilt you into stopping play by doing chores when you play. It's merely a trick to communicate that she is doing something more valuable and that you are lazy. If the chore situation is not equitable then that is a different discussion. It's just a way to rope you into an argument and to make you feel guilty for playing.
4.) If she has a specific problem with your playing (you're wasting your life, violent games are bad for the kids, volume too high, etc) she needs to voice it and you have to come to some kind of agreement on what, when, why, and how to play.
5.) Recognize that her needs are important and that some kind of schedule should be made, and agreed upon mutually, but it is important to get her to formally agree to honor it and not bother you at all during play-time.

In my experience if even one of these things fails, it all fails. Ultimately if you can't find a common ground here, you're screwed, and it's her or the games, end of discussion. Harmony, equality, respect. If you pause/play, you're acknowledging that your games are less important than whatever she's asking, which is probably being done not because she needs you, but to communicate (in the ****ing passive-aggressive way women do) that your games are a waste of time and less important than her, her needs, or the household needs. This diminishes the value of the games and you and your life and is not an acceptable compromise.

Of course, putting your computer in a soundproof room with a deadbolt on the door works too. I ****ing wrote sh4speech and never used it because she considered it so nerdy I was actually embarassed. How messed up is that? We're not together anymore. Whoever you're with should respect (and ideally share) your interests. Compatibility is important, and compromise and respect and understanding is critical when compatitiblity isn't there. Women can be very closed minded and one sided on this.

BTW my girl was 23 and I was 30, unmarried. So, older married folks, you're not alone. Life sucks for us all.

I'm glad we're not together anymore.

Torplexed · 11-21-07, 09:18 PM

Have to rerun this old episode.

RickC Sniper · 11-21-07, 09:36 PM

LOL. Ouch.

My wife likes the TV, I like my PC.
We've gotten along fine now for 35 yrs.

longam · 11-21-07, 10:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Torplexed

Have to rerun this old episode.

Yet we will know by each stroke of love from our better half. Excellent graphic Torplexed!

DeepSix · 01-04-08, 10:33 PM

LOL, have to admit, if I had a mate that looked liked Torplexed's graphic, I'd be a lot more interested in whatever plans she had than in surviving a patrol.

Torplexed · 01-04-08, 11:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeepSix

LOL, have to admit, if I had a mate that looked liked Torplexed's graphic, I'd be a lot more interested in whatever plans she had than in surviving a patrol.

Whoa! Another thread from the dead. :p That old graphic has been batting a .1000.

Yes. Be careful not to neglect the woman in your life. Otherwise things can get ugly real fast if she defects to the other camp......

Brer Rabbit · 01-05-08, 12:18 AM

After 43 years of marrige, I simply hit the pause button and take care of business. I'm about to wear out the pause button and am watiin for the spring to launch and put my eye out.

11-20-07, 05:24 PM	#47
stinger503 Sailor man Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Ontario, Canada Posts: 49 Downloads: 2 Uploads: 0	My fiancee doesn't seem to realise that I can TALK while I play SHIV! Although I get back at her in my own special way: I tell her every detail about my partol thus far. It bugs her, so my mission is accomplished. __________________ I was told we'd cruise the seas, for american gold, we'd fire no guns, shed no tears. Now I'm a broken man on a halifax pier. The Last of Barrett's Privateers.- Stan Rogers

11-21-07, 06:14 AM	#50
captiandon Soundman Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 148 Downloads: 0 Uploads: 0	I for one am very lucky. I drive truck and If I were married, which I am not, I am to far away from home all the time. I play it every time I am at a Shipper or reciver loading and unloading ( We dont Unload our own freight). When I am at home playing games is basicly all I do.... Humm, Must be why I am not married. I decided along time ago that I wasnt going to get married and being an OTR truck driver it seems to work out, All thought I dont have anyone at home to run arends for me and its hard to get anything done for myself otherwise. Good thing is I live with Family when I am not on the road, which is 8 to 10 days a month. __________________

11-21-07, 09:54 AM	#52
Chock Sea Lord Join Date: May 2005 Location: Under a thermal layer in chilly Olde England Posts: 1,842 Downloads: 0 Uploads: 0	I'll be playing around sub sims whilst sat on a train to London very shortly, so there's no way I can be interrupted by my missus for at least four hours there Funnily enough, she just summed all that up a moment ago, when I was messing around with the scale model Akula I'm currently building, with the words: 'Shift your toy submarine':rotfl: which I suppose it is when you get right down to it. To be fair, her interests (dog showing) probably encroach more on my stuff than the other way around. Give and take is the answer to a happy marriage, she drags me to Crufts and other dog shows (which bores me to death), I force her to crawl around inside preserved submarines and come flying with me in decrepit old biplanes. Actually that got her back really well once - you should have seen the look on her face when I told her (once we were up in the air) that the plane we were flying was built 70 years ago :rotfl: Chock __________________

11-21-07, 07:11 PM	#53
leovampire Eternal Patrol Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Waterbury, CT. USA Posts: 2,336 Downloads: 0 Uploads: 0	I have more of a problem with the Dog's They use their noses and lift my arm up off of the mouse and or keyboard. If I don't respond fast enough then they double team me one does the right arm the other does the left arm. How can you refuse that?! :rotfl: :rotfl: Got to love their way of thinking a problem out in getting Daddy's attention. __________________ AIR_BASE_NAV_MAP_MOD Reflections_on_the_Water

11-21-07, 07:49 PM	#54
minsc_tdp XO Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 411 Downloads: 1 Uploads: 0	Minsc's List for Successful Gaming/Relationship Harmony You have to sit down talk. Explain that agreement must be made on all of the following: 1.) You need these games for your relaxation and mental health. We can't all be "bettering ourselves" 100% of the time. Downtime is needed. 2.) It's not your fault if she's bored and has nothing to do while you play. Find friends. Get your own hobby. Whatever it is, do it elsewhere because your hobby requires isolation and zero disturbance. 3.) She absolutely should not guilt you into stopping play by doing chores when you play. It's merely a trick to communicate that she is doing something more valuable and that you are lazy. If the chore situation is not equitable then that is a different discussion. It's just a way to rope you into an argument and to make you feel guilty for playing. 4.) If she has a specific problem with your playing (you're wasting your life, violent games are bad for the kids, volume too high, etc) she needs to voice it and you have to come to some kind of agreement on what, when, why, and how to play. 5.) Recognize that her needs are important and that some kind of schedule should be made, and agreed upon mutually, but it is important to get her to formally agree to honor it and not bother you at all during play-time. In my experience if even one of these things fails, it all fails. Ultimately if you can't find a common ground here, you're screwed, and it's her or the games, end of discussion. Harmony, equality, respect. If you pause/play, you're acknowledging that your games are less important than whatever she's asking, which is probably being done not because she needs you, but to communicate (in the **ing passive-aggressive way women do) that your games are a waste of time and less important than her, her needs, or the household needs. This diminishes the value of the games and you and your life and is not an acceptable compromise. Of course, putting your computer in a soundproof room with a deadbolt on the door works too. I ing wrote sh4speech and never used it because she considered it so nerdy I was actually embarassed. How messed up is that? We're not together anymore. Whoever you're with should respect (and ideally share) your interests. Compatibility is important, and compromise and respect and understanding is critical when compatitiblity isn't there. Women can be very closed minded and one sided on this. BTW my girl was 23 and I was 30, unmarried. So, older married folks, you're not alone. Life sucks for us all. I'm glad we're not together anymore. __________________ June 29 2016 - shSpeech v2.55** - Voice Command for Silent Hunter 4! View Thread

11-21-07, 12:46 AM	#48
-Pv- The Old Man Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 1,434 Downloads: 5 Uploads: 0	Wives want 100% of our time. It's how they are made. Anything less and to them, it's as if we are cheating on them. Giving them second best. I can relate many stories of how gaming addiction has ruined marriages among people I know. The non-carreer wives (are there any left?) must realize the 5 hours of soaps during house chores are a lot like taking out the garbage between contact reports. Both endevours are a way of participating in fantacy, just with a different focus. For women, social activities bring the most satisfaction. For guys, we are more isolationist. Women want to be in the "in" circle of movers and shakers, knowing everything about everyone and everyone their friends know. Men want to be the mysterious masked hero riding out of the sun and back out into the haze. Not everyone has the same mix of the two, but in general these are devisive tendencies all by themselves. If you have wife and kids, gaming must take a seat in the back of the bus. -Pv-

11-21-07, 09:43 AM	#51
longam Admiral Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 2,014 Downloads: 26 Uploads: 0	Considering I work at the same place as my wife does and were both in management we get to see each other most of the day. Then when we both arrive at home we spend an hour or so talking about the day then were ready to get away from each other and do our own thing. Works out great!

11-21-07, 09:18 PM	#55
Torplexed Let's Sink Sumptin' ! Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Seattle, WA Posts: 5,823 Downloads: 43 Uploads: 0	Have to rerun this old episode.

11-21-07, 09:36 PM	#56
RickC Sniper Undetectable Join Date: Sep 1999 Location: Colorado Posts: 1,221 Downloads: 132 Uploads: 0	LOL. Ouch. My wife likes the TV, I like my PC. We've gotten along fine now for 35 yrs. __________________ Support Subsim http://www.subsim.com/store.html

01-04-08, 10:33 PM	#58
DeepSix Seasoned Skipper Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Music City Posts: 683 Downloads: 5 Uploads: 0	LOL, have to admit, if I had a mate that looked liked Torplexed's graphic, I'd be a lot more interested in whatever plans she had than in surviving a patrol. __________________ Jack's happy days will soon be gone, To return again, oh never! For they've raised his pay five cents a day, But they've stopped his grog forever. For tonight we'll merry, merry be, For tonight we'll merry, merry be, For tonight we'll merry, merry be, But tomorrow we'll be sober. - "Farewell to Grog"

01-05-08, 12:18 AM	#60
Brer Rabbit Briar Patch Runner Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Tucson, AZ Posts: 95 Downloads: 89 Uploads: 0	After 43 years of marrige, I simply hit the pause button and take care of business. I'm about to wear out the pause button and am watiin for the spring to launch and put my eye out.