I have Depression?!

[kiwi_2005]

Well sorry for sounding so morbid this morning. I Just got back from the doctor after a few tests lasting over 3 weeks and he has confirmed that im suffering from depression! My last test was a series of questions which i had to answer honestly. 10 is bad 1 is good, my mark was a 9.
My partner was the one who recommend i go see a doctor 3 weeks ago as she notice my mood swings were getting worse and reckon there was something wrong, i just use to laughed it off at the time and put it down to overworked or to many depth charges but she was right. I tend to lose interest in everything and find it easier to see the bad things in life instead of the good thats out there. I find it a real chore getting out of bed, i can sit down for more than ten minutes and next thing im snoring away into oblivion, its like i never get enough sleep im always tired. I use to be a real out going person, happy to meet people, yet for the past 8 months or so i try to avoid all contact with others apart from close friends, i thought it was just a fraze we go through or like a mid life crisis or something, (im 42) but no its depression. And ive taken the first step and admitt i suffer from it. 2nd step is am i willing to take medication like Prozac? ! well i said no and decided to go cold turkey instead, there is no way im gonna take some wonder pill and walk around like a zombie. Cold turkey is an option which the doctor provides me with methods they put down to like a list of things i have to go by day to day, but not recommended on the basis it will take longer and the slog with be all uphill. But prozac is simply out of the question for me ive heard more negatives than positives from that drug so dont want to go there. I have been very lucky when i think of it now, around 10 months ago i got laid of my job as system administrator, but the funny thing is i got reemployed not long after because as you know with todays technology we are now able to not have to go to the office but instead work at home and just log into the server. My boss offered me this option which i grab without a second thought all i do is log into the server each day and access the files they have left me to edit & keep the server uptodate etc all from the comfort of doing it from home - But as i look back i realised now that my boss actually got rid of me, i use to be argumentive towards her and we would always be debating on whats what, she probably thought im going get rid of this ba*tard but we need his skills so i'll get him to work from home. She's a great boss and probably sense something was wrong. Instead of firing me she just moved me as far away from the office as possible :rotfl: I think i owe her a big apology which im going to see her this week. In fact theres a few people in my life who i owe apologies too. The scary thought is i would of just kept on living the way i am not knowing im suffering from depression if it wasn't for my partner! who ive only known for 6-7 months and now im asking myself how did she put up with me? I must of been a real pain to live with.

So anyone else suffered from depression one time or the other in there lives? Any tips, advice. Hey and i understand if this post gets push down the line in minutes as depression i am told is rarely talked about openly. But do you know that depression is not like the flu meaning when you get the flu you know your not well, depression is a hidden sickness where most people that suffer from it dont even know they are. Apparently i have been suffering from it for over a yr now and just found out yesterday. Plus i must admit its a big bruise on my male ego, but im glad i now know what it is.

[Sorry Neal for putting such a morbid topic up on your site, but i figure this would be the best place to talk about it as commanding subs even though its only in cyber space requires great skills and edge of your seat stamina. There must be a few Captains out there living on the edge. :P ]