What do you make of this?

[AVGWarhawk]

Originally Posted by Schroeder

It's even worse. People look the other way. I have a relative who is a part time teacher. Once she noticed that some guys were bullying someone. As a part time teacher who hasn't been teaching for some years she asked some of her colleagues how such cases are addressed nowadays. She got the answer: Look the other way.

I'm guessing most teachers are afraid of being sued if anything physical might become of it...and students do get physical with teachers. Countless cases in the city of Baltimore MD last year. It is a hard situation to address. What is the legal definition of bullying? Is there one. Harrassment? What term does one use?

[Platapus]

Each state has their own definition of bullying (if any).

That is one of the many problems with this problem: How to define it.

Extremes are easy to define

Kid repeatably getting the crap beaten out of him would probably be considered bullying.

Kid choosing not to play with another kid would probably not be considered bullying.

Where is the "line" between the two extremes?

If you are going to have a policy or a law prohibiting bullying, you have to have a standard where an authority can determine that

This is bullying.

That is not.

A very very hard issue to solve.

A bully is a lot like art. You know it when you see it, but it can be hard to define.

[GoldenRivet]

Originally Posted by Digital_Trucker

"Man up" is not what you tell a child to do when he complains about being bullied.

i can only envision one type of individual who would give such advise to a youngster

[Jimbuna]

Well, seeing as how examples are being posted.....heres mine.

About 13 years of age and my school teamed up with another local school and went on a weeks stay in log cabins at an area in the UK known as The Lake District.

This individual from the other school obviously took an instant dislike to me and started name calling in front of his peer group.

My peer group started questioning me and asking why I didn't retaliate.

I wasn't entirely honest in my response when I said I didn't like conflict because tbh, this guy frightened me.

After a few days and a steady escalation of his verbal bullying of me my peer group started asking me if I was a man or a mouse.

There are few things in a young persons life that are more traumatic than losing the respect of his peer group IMO.

You could say that was the final straw, so the next day I approached this guy in a well populated area of the camp to ensure there were witnesses and offered him a fight.....I can tell you the cheeks of my arse were chewing themselves to death LOL.

To my utter amazement the guy backed down saying he was only joking and he never bothered me again.....we have been friends ever since.

[GoldenRivet]

I recall being about 6 years old playing little league soccer (football to most of you)

most of the kids were there just to kick a ball around and not really understand the point of the game so much.

i recall one kid running along side of me and spitting into my face

i walked off the field in disgust, and my parents and a few other parents pulled their kids out of the league... i haven't played soccer since.

Another incident, in 7th grade I was one of the lucky ones to get hooked up with 4th period spanish. I would say that nearly every bully in the 7th grade had 4th period spanash just by pure happenstance.

so there i sat, nearly every day with the group verbally abusing me to no end. it was torture - but nothing worth hanging myself over obviously.

4th period spanish was the only class i made an out right "F" in.

some years later, in the 11th grade, the head bully of the group approached me i thought to myself "great... i thought by 11th grade we would outgrow this nonsense"

he walkes squarely up to me with a humble...

"Hey... listen, im sorry for the way i treated you back then... it wasnt cool and i was wondering if you would accept my apology."

the guy still looked like a meat head, smelled like a meat head, and dressed like a meat head... i smelled a trap.

i accepted his apology anyway and we went our separate ways. He never sent cross words in my direction again.

a young lady who was pretty much the queen of my middle school was pure evil to most of us folks who were not dropped off in front of the school in a porshce in the morning.

she would constantly ride me and my friends about everything from our parents cars, to our looks, to our choice in clothes etc etc.

she switched to another middle school abotu the same time i did... and we wound up going to the same high school a few years later.

her tune had soundly changed... she was nice to me and my friends, and even apologetic for her abuses.

appears the school she switched to - she was considered "low class" just as she had considered us "low class" - and she was teased daily.

after a dose of her own medicine.

"i cant imagine how it must have felt to deal with me every day... i feel very bad about it and im sorry."

now that im grown up - and with those two experiences - its easy for me to say to myself... "they were kids who were scared, or trying to fit in with their crowd or just trying to make themselves feel better by bullying others."

i have long since forgiven those who never apologized.

but i will always remember what it felt like... and any children i might some day have - they will know better than to contribute to bullying.

[AVGWarhawk]

To my utter amazement the guy backed down saying he was only joking and he never bothered me again.....we have been friends ever since.

Exactly, most will back down, however, those that don't and kick your arse look stupid to others in the school/peer group. A lot of times it can be a win/win situation for the target

I can tell you the cheeks of my arse were chewing themselves to death LOL.

That is just too funny.