"O mein Gott, it was close" story (or maybe stories?)

[seafarer]

I have been guilty of sinking one of our own - a big merchant during the Norway campaign.

It was pitch dark with a complete overcast, and the ship was traveling alone and blacked out, and about a day behind a reported enemy task force. How was I to know? - the flag was completely invisible under such conditions and all of the reports and our own contacts over the previous week had been enemy forces.

And, and, :hmm: it was raining, yeah, that's it. it was raining, hard. Raining toads honest, big bizarre hoary mucky toads. And there were locusts - swarms of them everywhere (or where those flying fish?), all squished up against the Uzo lens. I tried to wipe it clear, but, but,...

It wasn't my fault, I swear!!!