The idiot's guide to pronouncing "nuclear" and other difficult words

Chock · 11-13-07, 05:31 PM

How to sound like you are from England:

Every American knows that there are only two English accents. They both appear in films frequently. First you have the peasantry, they say things like: 'Cor blimey guv'nor, it's a proper ow-dyer-do and no mistake'. In films, these will be butlers, chauffers, tommies that meet American soldiers on Omaha Beach in WW2 films , and thieves. Then you have the toffs. In films, these will be either posh people that swan about in Edwardian England quoting poetry and swooning over lost love whilst rowing up the river near Oxford University, or they will be playing German terrorists in the Die Hard movies, occasionally, they will play Spitfire pilots in WW2 films. You can recognise them by their common phraseology, they say things like: 'How do you do old chap, that's awfully decent of you old boy'.

To pass yourself off (or 'orf', if you are being one of the posh types), as one of these plucky Brits, here are some handy pronunciation tips:

Tomato: Tom-art-oh

Buoy: Boy

Semi: Sem-ee

Faucet: Tap

Truck: Lorry, Juggernaut, or pantechnicon if you are posh

Automobile: Car, or Motor-car if you are posh

Airplane: Aer-o-plane or aircraft if you are a posh Spitfire pilot

Sidewalk: Pavement or Kerb if you are posh

Irony: Eye-ron-ee

Median: Cent-ral res-er-va-tion

Drapes: Cur-tains

Leicestershire: Lest-er-sher

Paris, France: Paris - in England, nobody cares if there is a place in the US with the same name

Glasgow: Glaz-go, or Glaz-gee, if you are Scottish

Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysilio gogogoch: Llanfair PG, the full name of the town is only used by Welsh people to annoy their English neighbours

Motorcycle: Bike, or Mot-er-sigh-kul if you are posh

Double decaffeinated latte: Nice cup of tea, this is universal regardless of class

Freeway: Mot=er-way, or dual carriageway if you are posh

Union Jack: Union flag

European Union: Bloody com-mon mar-ket

Sub-altern: sub-ul-tun

Sgt Major: Sarn-may-jaw or Sarge if you are a peasant

The Royal family: The use-less in-breds, or mum and dad if you are posh

Submariner: Sub-ma-rin-er, and never how Bill Paxton pronounces it in U-571

Chock

11-13-07, 05:31 PM	#8
Chock Sea Lord Join Date: May 2005 Location: Under a thermal layer in chilly Olde England Posts: 1,842 Downloads: 0 Uploads: 0	How to sound like you are from England: Every American knows that there are only two English accents. They both appear in films frequently. First you have the peasantry, they say things like: 'Cor blimey guv'nor, it's a proper ow-dyer-do and no mistake'. In films, these will be butlers, chauffers, tommies that meet American soldiers on Omaha Beach in WW2 films , and thieves. Then you have the toffs. In films, these will be either posh people that swan about in Edwardian England quoting poetry and swooning over lost love whilst rowing up the river near Oxford University, or they will be playing German terrorists in the Die Hard movies, occasionally, they will play Spitfire pilots in WW2 films. You can recognise them by their common phraseology, they say things like: 'How do you do old chap, that's awfully decent of you old boy'. To pass yourself off (or 'orf', if you are being one of the posh types), as one of these plucky Brits, here are some handy pronunciation tips: Tomato: Tom-art-oh Buoy: Boy Semi: Sem-ee Faucet: Tap Truck: Lorry, Juggernaut, or pantechnicon if you are posh Automobile: Car, or Motor-car if you are posh Airplane: Aer-o-plane or aircraft if you are a posh Spitfire pilot Sidewalk: Pavement or Kerb if you are posh Irony: Eye-ron-ee Median: Cent-ral res-er-va-tion Drapes: Cur-tains Leicestershire: Lest-er-sher Paris, France: Paris - in England, nobody cares if there is a place in the US with the same name Glasgow: Glaz-go, or Glaz-gee, if you are Scottish Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysilio gogogoch: Llanfair PG, the full name of the town is only used by Welsh people to annoy their English neighbours Motorcycle: Bike, or Mot-er-sigh-kul if you are posh Double decaffeinated latte: Nice cup of tea, this is universal regardless of class Freeway: Mot=er-way, or dual carriageway if you are posh Union Jack: Union flag European Union: Bloody com-mon mar-ket Sub-altern: sub-ul-tun Sgt Major: Sarn-may-jaw or Sarge if you are a peasant The Royal family: The use-less in-breds, or mum and dad if you are posh Submariner: Sub-ma-rin-er, and never how Bill Paxton pronounces it in U-571 Chock __________________