Dealing with Bipolarism

[Skybird]

Bipolar is not the same like bipolar - there is so huge a variety of possible variations and side.symptoms and different accents on different symptoms that it is difficult or better: verboten to compare the one case with the other and by the first conclude on the latter.

First step must be, and that is an ultimate necessity, a precise differential diagnosis, to learn what kind of disporder she really has. that will still interact with other characteristics of her personality, and these must be marked as well. And then, not earlier, we can talk about helpful livi9ng styles, medications, therapy.

Bipolarism can be contained somewhat, can be held in kind of a stasis, but if it really is bipoalrism in her case, it most liekly will be with here for the rest of her life. Sorry to say that, but that was status of science when I studied that stuff. Maybe there was progress being made in past years, I cannot say, since i am out of touch with the profession.

Courage, GR!

[GoldenRivet]

It could very well be she is just a woman

but its literally like dating 2 different people... they just both look exactly the same and spend a couple of weeks at a time with ya!

[Stealhead]

My sister is bipolar it was never diagnosed when she was a kid but later as a young adult.She was a very difficult person to deal with because one day she was very easy going and the next she was mean as all hell.Even after she got diagnosed and received therapy she had some difficultly she was married for a few years and got divorced but that rift was a two way fault for sure.

Now though she is much better she can fairly well manage her disorder and she got married again to a much better more understanding and none self centered husband.

I agree with Skybird though you can not "cure" being bipolar but a person suffering from it can if they chose to do so manage it and be a decent person to be around most of the time(hell no one is perfect right?).

That seems odd what your girlfriend said:

"she does not want injections and has an aversion to popping pills but may be willing to take a pill if it doesnt require a prescription."

That seems like wanting to avoid something to me she must know that any medication to help her would be prescribed.
Seems like she wants to avoid being labeled as something but to get any help she has no choice even if nothing is prescribed they are going to you are this or that.

Your friend needs to see a professional though she may be bipolar she may be something else.

[frau kaleun]

My father was severely bipolar - behavior that looked like paranoid schizophrenia when high, crippling clinical depression when low, and when I say 'crippling' I mean delusions of physical disability and paralysis resulting in the inability to get out of bed for weeks at a time. So believe me, I can more than sympathize with what you're going through.

This was many many years ago and the meds they had then unfortunately did not work all that well for him. But things have changed and in many cases bipolar disorder is manageable IF one gets the necessary help from those qualified to make a diagnosis and recommend/prescribe treatment.

I would not be surprised if she fears being labelled in the process but it's a treatable illness like any other and if it goes unchecked there are likely to be much worse "labels" that could come her way from those who do not care about or understand the situation. If she really is bipolar or something similar, it's not going to get better by itself and will probably get worse, which would be a tragedy for her and everyone around her.

Can't say much more than to echo Sky's words above about getting help from a qualified professional in both diagnosis and treatment. I wish you both the best.

[krashkart]

It's like I mentioned to a friend once; at first I was afraid of being written off and tossed in the loony bin, but that's not what actually happened. And there hasn't been anyone yet to label me as a psycho or anything like that -- not that anyone in the neighborhood knows about the illness anyway. We're not psychos, we're just sick, and I think for the most part society understands that. Don't worry about labels. Worry about your health instead. That's much more important.

[Penguin]

I had a friend who has schizophrenia. I want to mention it, because the symptoms do look very similar to a bipolar disorder - even the physical roots of both illnesses can be the same (a lack/abundance of certain neurotransmitters). If the cause is bodychemical, then there are afaik no non-prescription drugs there, that could bring the back the balance, which you can legally get. However to determine the disorder you need the help of an professional, I can't preach this enough with the choir here. I had to give up my own aversions against quacks when fighting with and for my friend. No matter how deep your relationship is, there is a point when you reach your own limits and it looks you are at this point atm.

A good first step is realization: that she realizes that she has a problem. A step further would be acceptance. I am mainly talking about her, because without her realization/acceptance and the will to change anything you'll be running against walls. I can relate to a hatred against injections or pills, have it myself. But the one thing you can try to get into her mind is that she has a malfunction in her body and just like a person with diabetis or high blood pressure can have a normal life with these little chemical crutches, she can have this too. Though it's very advisable to have an accompaning therapy.

It looks like have come to a crossroad in your relationship, the question you have to ask yourself and your heart is: are you willing to go through all this with her together? You have to answert this for yourself, but what I've read from you here is that you strike me as a fighting type who is not willing to go down easily.

With my friend, I went through a lot, invested a lot of time, sweat and nerves. We even managed to get him out of a mental institution to take care for him - my girlfriend is a social worker, so she could put in some weight there. Unfortunately, this all went to shambles, though we didn't give up after some backlashes, there was one time to put an end to the friendship, after some betrayal. Another reason is that he was not willing enoguh to realize his state and work on it, for example he did too many drugs which were quite contraproductive to the pills he took against his illness.

The morale of this little story: fight for her if you feel something for her, if you give up, no one has the right to judge you and throw the first stone.
Good luck and my best wishes!

[Skybird]

Originally Posted by Stealhead

That seems odd what your girlfriend said:

"she does not want injections and has an aversion to popping pills but may be willing to take a pill if it doesnt require a prescription."

That seems like wanting to avoid something to me she must know that any medication to help her would be prescribed.
Seems like she wants to avoid being labeled as something but to get any help she has no choice even if nothing is prescribed they are going to you are this or that.

A bit late, this also got my attention.

GR, talk with her if there is something she maybe is afraid to reveal to you about herself. It probbaly is not the case, but stories like this have happened: that somebody denied to meet a doctor becasue it would reveal to a loved one something the person wanted to hide. Pregnancy? Drug abuse? Signs of violence experienced at home? A genetically inherited disease in her family?

Talk with her, but be indirect and careful when asking for these or other possible factors.

People also avoid doctors because they are paralysed by fear over a diagnosis of something bad. If so, she feels like a deer in a searchlight right now. I'm sure you know how to handle her in that case.

Go easy, but secure definite answers to above questions.

[CaptainHaplo]

Professional help is the first thing. However, with a "monthly cycle" - it may be more than just bipolar disorder. That's an extremely fast up and down swing. 4 cycles a year is considered "rapid" for a bipolar individual - your talking 12 cycles a year.

At the risk of complicating the issue - how does this coincide with her menstrual cycle? Its very likely this could be related to the hormonal changes she goes through, and if so - her OB/GYN would be a good first step to talk to. Especially since she seems adverse to being "stigmatized" with a diagnosis. If its not hormonally related, the door has opened so that it will be easier to get her more professional treatment.

If she is unwilling - and you are determined to help her through this - then you can also enlist the aid of a homeopath to start. A good one can provide her with a diet that will help "balance" some of those brain chemicals that cause the episodes you see. Its not as good as a professional in the field, but you can't MAKE her do what is needed - and its sometimes wise not to jump into mental health conclusions. You go see a Dr. with "we think she has XYZ" and they are likely to just confirm it and treat the symptoms - not the cause.

[GoldenRivet]

she has an aversion to traditional medication and injections

partly because she is scared of needles

party because her mother became an addict and she was removed from her home life at a young age and placed with other family members.

add those two together and you have a recipe for someone who is hard core about new age medicine

She wont even take Asprin or Tylenol... but im sure i can get her to do something when we spend some time talking this weekend.

who knows? its tough when you end up caring for someone who either has bipolar disorder - or just sort of seems like they do.

[CaptainHaplo]

GR - I went through a heart rending situation a couple of years ago because of the depression of someone I cared for. All I can say is stay strong, respect that the other person has a perspective you can partially understand, but never fully. Be supportive as you can be, but don't sacrifice who you are in trying to help them.

If I can offer support in any way, let me know.

[Skybird]

Originally Posted by GoldenRivet

hard core about new age medicine

VERY BAD IDEA.

Stop her from depending on that exclusively. Even shoot her in the leg if that is needed to stop her from going there.

Esoteric dumbheads should be held responsible by penalty law code for what they write and tell other people.