2012 Subsim Fantasy Football Reports

Gut Wrench · 09-19-11, 10:57 PM

HOW HIGH CAN YOU SCORE?
Don't ask Tom.

Week Two in the 2011 Subsim Fantasy Football, and how come someone didn't point out the error in title of this thread? A check of the copy room reveals Bernard was working that night.

The early game, the big shoot out between Tom Brady of the of the Nutcrushers and Phillip Rivers of the Australian Taipans. Last week, it was Coach Mookie who said

Quote:

Hard to count on Brady throwing for 500 yds and 4 TDs each week.

Brady was off his game and only threw for 423 yards and 3 TD's this week. At the post game conference, it was evident that Tom upset.

"I throw 3 TD's and Anquan Brown, Jacoby Jones and Derick Mason can't catch one?"

Really Tom? Cussing out your team in week two? Disharmony in the Nutcruchers see them fall to the Australian Taipans 79 - 121.

The anticipated top of the table clash between the Wild Boston Terriers and the Ghost Monkeys lived up to expectations, and a new season record. In a league when a win would be expected if your score 95 points, the 108 by the Terriers wasn't enough as Mookie and the Ghost Monkeys asserted themselves as the leagues premier team, racking up 152 points.

What a difference a year can make, when Mookie had the first half of season decided by less a point, to turn around and lay siege. The Ghost Monkeys step out as the #1 team in the league.

After an embarrassing loss last week, Mr Chris and the Helmand Nighthawks went home to London and regrouped. With no film on the newest team to the league, the Delaware Destroyers, this was the other high scoring game of the week. Unfortunately, like what happened in the Bills/Raiders game, the television broadcast left the game at 4th and 1 with 37 seconds to play, and no one got to watch the thriller of the week as the Nighthawks romped home. Final score Nighthawks 137 Destroyers 119.

Bookmakers in Vegas have again lowered the odds of Coach Rick and the Dragons to win the Torpedo pool after they quietly advanced to 2-0 with a win over Every Given Sunday 137 - 98. It didn't help that EGS Kicker, Nate Kading started the game in the local hospital with his foot in a cast. Still, even though Kading scored 0 for EGS, the Ravens defence was only marginally better with 2 points. The Dragons match up next week in the game of the week against the Wild Boston Terriers, a rematch of the championship game a few years ago.

In a surprising game, Coach Pit started WR Brandon Lloyd and TE Mercedes Lewis for a grand total of...no score. One can only wonder what might have been in t e game against the Bad Asses. Badasses win in a (relative) low scoring game, 97 - 82.

The closest game of the week was Coach Casey taking his new team, the Guns of Hoculli to an ealry lead and waiting out the Black Cats and their Giant defense in the last game of the week. The Cats came within 4 points of winning the game with a late defensive touchdown, but the Giants were unable to hold the opposition to less than 7 points. Final scored, the Guns of Hoculli 110, the Black Cats 101.

As the league heads to week 3, 4 teams are looking for the first win and four teams remain undefeated at 2-0.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

For achieving 9 receptions for 143 yards and 3 receiving TD's for a total of 39 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Miles Austin of the Helmand Nighthawks with the Week Two MVT.

mookiemookie · 09-20-11, 05:24 AM

I was tired of losing by 1 point every week last year, so I decided to get the blowout win award every week this year. It was a brilliantly simple plan, really.

AVGWarhawk · 09-20-11, 06:31 AM

seems to be working!

Gut Wrench · 09-26-11, 10:56 PM

THREE THRILLERS
But no win for Tom or Tony.

Week Three in the 2011 Subsim Fantasy Football, and Tom Brady of the Nutcrunchers can pass for half a mile and 4 TD's and still loose, but if you want thrillers hanging on Monday Night, look no further than Tony Romo of the Delaware Destroyers playing in the low scoring slugfest of the week.

Before we look at this weeks game, lets get the important information out there straight away.

DONATE TO SUBSIM.

And now back to the games.

Pertpetual candass quarterback Tony Romo of the Delaware Crunchers, needed everything he had on the last game of week. The Delaware Destroyers were trailing the Australian Taipans and looked set to upset the #2 ranked team after the Taipans QB Phillip Robers choked earlier. Needing just a measley 9 points, their victory rested on the supposedly punctured lung and bruised ego of Tony Romo. With less than 2 minutes to go, Coach Growler opted to have Romo ...hand off the ball. Taipans win with the low score of 68.92 - 61.85.

The second thriller of the week belong to the Ghost Monkeys (2-0) and the BP Badasses. The Asses were trailing The Mokeys after Kenny Brit broke his ankle, leaving the team perched precariously looking at their first loss. Jason Whitten was the sole remaining member of the Monkeys to play, but the Badasses had two wide receivers and slowly caught enough catches to pull away. In the final quarter of the week, the Basasses showed their flesh parts and slowly mooned the Monkeys to win by 9 points. Final score, Badasses 103 Ghost Monkeys 94.

The third thriller of the week was the celler dweller battle of the Nutcrunchers and the Black Cats. Coach AVG Warhawk was thinking that his lead by Terrific Tom and his 387 yards was enough, but when your opposition is Big Ben, no win is assured.

"Don't you have some woman to assault?" Coach Warhawk exclaimed at the end of the game, preferring not to shake hands but to flip off Big Ben. Roethlisberger is listed as probable for next week with hurt feelings, as the Black Cats get their first win 96.23 - 93.19

The surprise winner of the weekend was Coach Casey with his new team, the Guns of Hocculi. Against the traditional high scoring team of Mr Chris and the Helmand Nighthawks, the Guners (or is it the Hockers?) hold the Nighthawks down to earn another surprise win, while moving to the top of the league at 3-0. Next week they play away against a set of Badasses.

Slowly and quietly, Coach Rick and the Dragons have slithered to 3-0 and lead the Subsimmers by one game. The Dragons were matched against the high powered Wild Boston Terriers, but the Dragons were too strong on the arm of Matthew Stafford and the hands of Calvin Johnson.

"See my first year QB," Coach Rick beamed after the game. "We're aiming for 4," as the Dragons head away to play the Black Cats.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

For a convincing win aganst Every Given Sunday (what's happened to them this year?) achieving 254 yards and 4 passing TD's for a total of 27 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Eli Manning of the Reapers with the Week Three MVT.

Growler · 09-27-11, 09:50 AM

After this last week's performance, I've half a mind to fire the entire team and take this year's ticket revenues to a small island somewhere warm.

mookiemookie · 09-27-11, 09:56 AM

A moment of silence, please, for Kenny Britt's ACL.

Man, my WR's crapped the bed this week.

AVGWarhawk · 09-27-11, 10:04 AM

I was so close to a win. I could taste it!!! Spanked again....

mookiemookie · 09-27-11, 10:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AVGWarhawk

I was so close to a win. I could taste it!!! Spanked again....

Get used to it. It won't be any different next weekend either.

AVGWarhawk · 09-27-11, 11:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mookiemookie

Get used to it. It won't be any different next weekend either.

Says you....

AVGWarhawk · 09-27-11, 10:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Growler

After this last week's performance, I've half a mind to fire the entire team and take this year's ticket revenues to a small island somewhere warm.

I have and still suck.....

Gut Wrench · 10-03-11, 11:34 PM

RODGERS RECORDS
...everything but a win.

Week Four in the 2011 Subsim Fantasy Football, and for the second time in two weeks, the Australian Taipans have been in a thriller with the Wild Boston Terriers.

We'll get to that game after this public service announcement..

DONATE TO SUBSIM... OR THE TERRORISTS WIN.

Seven days ago the Taipans were in front holding onto their lead. This week they had to do it the hardest way possible, against a record breaking score. Aaron Rodgers of the Wild Boston Terriers came out in the second half of the weekend and lit up the scoreboard, scoring 4 touchdowns, 2 rushing touchdowns and 408 yards. Along with his accomplice Greg Jennings the duo scored 71 points of the WBT total score. The Terriers held a narrow lead before the Taipans ran the Jets defense on to the field.

"We got lucky and and all the points scored against us, were credited to the offense," Coach Pioneer said.

The Taipans snuk ahead with a defensive TD, and late Monday night, Reggie Wayne put the game out of reach. Taipans move to 4-0, and Coach McBee was seen leaving the stadium kicking a trash can down the street.

Want another record - it's not that old, you only have to look back at Week 2 to the Ghost Monkeys who scored 154 points against the WBT. This week, the Monkeys made a meal of the 0-3 Nutcrunchers, racking up 166 points, certainly the most points I have ever seen in a game. However the Ghost monkeys sit one game back in the in Sub Simmers division, from, the every quietly achieving Dragons.

In week 4 Coach Rick took his highly touted Dragons into the Black Cats House of Purr. Not distracted by the Pussycat Doll cheerleaders, Calvin Johnson and his 24 points lead the Dragons to an easy 131-88 win. Had Johnson got just 3 more yards the Dragons would have scored 140 points and given themselves a weekly average score of 120 points.

From the Coaches own mouth, "120 points each week will win you the league."

The Dragons will be hoping for another 120 points next week as they go against the Taipans in a top of the ladder clash.

The third undefeated team this year, currently sitting at 4-0 in the Surface Skimmers division, Coach Casey's Guns of Hocculi accounted for last years Divisional Winners, the BP Badasses. Despite Gunners QB Kevin Kolb scoring -.21 points for his performance, WR Wes Walker and TE Jimmy Graham lifted the Gunners to their fourth straight week, and a surprising two game lead in the sub simmers division.

In the other two games of the week, the 1-2 Delaware Destroyers defeated the less than .500% Reapers, 113 - 82, and scoring their first win of the season, Every Given Sunday defeat the Helmand Nighthawks, 132 - 63.

A quarter of the way through the season the table looks like this. In the Sub Simmers division the Dragons at 4-0 have skipped away from the Ghost Monkeys (3-1) and the BP Badasses (2-2). The rest of the division sits at 1-3

In the Surface Skimmers Division, the Guns of Hoculi and the Taipans lead at 4-0, two games clear of the Delaware Destroyers. The Black Cats and Nighthawks are at 1-4, while the Nutcrunchers are the sole team without a win.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

After a surprising 0-3 start and sitting at the bottom of the Sub Simmers division, the defense has finally kicked in and brought home the first win of the season. For the effort of 2 sacks, 1 interception, 3 fumble recoveries and 3 defensive touchdowns, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present the Raven Defense of Every Given Sunday with the Week Four MVT.

AVGWarhawk · 10-04-11, 08:34 AM

And my motto still stands! "This team could not beat it's way out of a wet paper bag!"

nikimcbee · 10-04-11, 11:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AVGWarhawk

And my motto still stands! "This team could not beat it's way out of a wet paper bag!"

Are you talking about the MN gophers or vikings?

AVGWarhawk · 10-04-11, 12:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nikimcbee

Are you talking about the MN gophers or vikings?

The Nutcrunchers of course!

Gut Wrench · 10-10-11, 10:56 PM

DRAGONS FIRE
with the Gunners smoldering.

Week Five in the 2011 Subsim Fantasy Football, and the have stamped their authority on the League, but they don't have it all their own way.

We'll get to that game after this public service announcement.

NOMINATE SUBSIM FFL REPORTS FOR THIS YEARS "BEST OF SUBSIM".

It was the top of the table clash nobody expected. A former League Champion against a foreign up comer, the winner to advance to 5-0 and take a stranglehold on their division. The Dragons and Taipans clash was everything is was billed up to be...until Roddy White and Tony Gonzales got garbage time receptions at the end of Sunday night to reduce the Taipans 40 point lead to less than 20. With Matthew Stafford and Megatron Johnson hooking up for what seemed like a 3 mile touchdown pass, the Dragons moved ahead and dropped the Taipans to 4-1.

But the Dragons are not the only undefeated team, The Guns of Hoculi, the new team under Coach Casey, has also moved on to 5-0 in the Subsimmer division soundly accounting for the 1-3 reapers 142 - 79. The Gunners take a one game lead in the division but will meet the Taipans next week in one of the more exciting match ups.

Two teams with the most undeserving record of 1-3 lined up against each other. The Wild Boston Terriers, red hot favorites at the start of the season, were facing the Helmand Nighthawks. These teams are off to rough starts, unlike previous years, facing off with a pair of monster rushing backs. The Purple Jesus of the Nighthawks put three touchdowns up against the Terrier's Law Firm of Ben Jarvis Green Ellis 2 TD's. It would be the arm of Aaron Rodgers which finally lifts the Terriers to .500% with a 119-78 win. The Nighthawks fall almost to the bottom of the league.

Proving you don't need to be a top tier team to have a great game, Every Given Sunday finally made it home to host the Nutcrunchers. Even with Tom Terrific as QB, the Nutcrunchers are still looking for their first win as the fall to EGS 95-87. After the game Tom was seen sobbing into a pink handkerchief that rumors suspect was once owned by Bridget Moynaham. Sorry Tom, you get to go home and put up with Giesel tonight.

They've had some high scores and look to be a legitimate title contender despite sititng at 3-1 before this weeks games. Coach Mookie of the once beloved "Lose by a Point" team with his new Ghost Moonkeys have been handing teams a spanking this year. Week Five was no exception and while not a high scoring game, Dwayne Bowe caught 30 points of the Ghost Monkeys points. It didn't help that the Delaware Destroyers started QB Tony Romo...who stayed at home on a Bye weekend. Monkeys leapfrog up the table to 4-1 winning 88 - 60. Next week they host the Dragons in the game of the week.

However, proving that leaving your best player as a starter in a bye week can still get a win, are the Black Cats. The Kitty Cats started Ray Rice this week and despite his absence, managed to rack up 107 points against the BP Basasses. Cats advance to 2-3 but two games back in the Sub Simmer division.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

After a slow start in the Sub Simmers division, the arm has finally kicked in. For the effort of 5 touchdowns and 228 yards, scoring a massive 32.06 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Ben Roethlisberger of the Black Cats with the Week Five MVT.

[/QUOTE]

09-20-11, 06:31 AM	#3
AVGWarhawk Lucky Jack Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: In a 1954 Buick. Posts: 28,282 Downloads: 90 Uploads: 0	seems to be working! __________________ “You're painfully alive in a drugged and dying culture.” ― Richard Yates, Revolutionary Road

09-27-11, 09:50 AM	#5
Growler A long way from the sea Join Date: May 2005 Location: Iowa Posts: 1,913 Downloads: 21 Uploads: 0	After this last week's performance, I've half a mind to fire the entire team and take this year's ticket revenues to a small island somewhere warm. __________________ At Fiddler’s Green, where seamen true When here they’ve done their duty The bowl of grog shall still renew And pledge to love and beauty.

09-27-11, 09:56 AM	#6
mookiemookie Navy Seal Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Houston, TX Posts: 9,404 Downloads: 105 Uploads: 1	A moment of silence, please, for Kenny Britt's ACL. Man, my WR's crapped the bed this week. __________________ They don’t think it be like it is, but it do. Want more U-boat Kaleun portraits for your SH3 Commander Profiles? Download the SH3 Commander Portrait Pack here.

09-27-11, 10:04 AM	#7
AVGWarhawk Lucky Jack Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: In a 1954 Buick. Posts: 28,282 Downloads: 90 Uploads: 0	I was so close to a win. I could taste it!!! Spanked again.... __________________ “You're painfully alive in a drugged and dying culture.” ― Richard Yates, Revolutionary Road

10-04-11, 08:34 AM	#12
AVGWarhawk Lucky Jack Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: In a 1954 Buick. Posts: 28,282 Downloads: 90 Uploads: 0	And my motto still stands! "This team could not beat it's way out of a wet paper bag!" __________________ “You're painfully alive in a drugged and dying culture.” ― Richard Yates, Revolutionary Road

09-20-11, 05:24 AM	#2
mookiemookie Navy Seal Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Houston, TX Posts: 9,404 Downloads: 105 Uploads: 1	I was tired of losing by 1 point every week last year, so I decided to get the blowout win award every week this year. It was a brilliantly simple plan, really. __________________ They don’t think it be like it is, but it do. Want more U-boat Kaleun portraits for your SH3 Commander Profiles? Download the SH3 Commander Portrait Pack here.

09-26-11, 10:56 PM	#4
Gut Wrench Watch Officer Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Everywhere Posts: 342 Downloads: 0 Uploads: 0	THREE THRILLERS But no win for Tom or Tony. Week Three in the 2011 Subsim Fantasy Football, and Tom Brady of the Nutcrunchers can pass for half a mile and 4 TD's and still loose, but if you want thrillers hanging on Monday Night, look no further than Tony Romo of the Delaware Destroyers playing in the low scoring slugfest of the week. Before we look at this weeks game, lets get the important information out there straight away. DONATE TO SUBSIM. And now back to the games. Pertpetual candass quarterback Tony Romo of the Delaware Crunchers, needed everything he had on the last game of week. The Delaware Destroyers were trailing the Australian Taipans and looked set to upset the #2 ranked team after the Taipans QB Phillip Robers choked earlier. Needing just a measley 9 points, their victory rested on the supposedly punctured lung and bruised ego of Tony Romo. With less than 2 minutes to go, Coach Growler opted to have Romo ...hand off the ball. Taipans win with the low score of 68.92 - 61.85. The second thriller of the week belong to the Ghost Monkeys (2-0) and the BP Badasses. The Asses were trailing The Mokeys after Kenny Brit broke his ankle, leaving the team perched precariously looking at their first loss. Jason Whitten was the sole remaining member of the Monkeys to play, but the Badasses had two wide receivers and slowly caught enough catches to pull away. In the final quarter of the week, the Basasses showed their flesh parts and slowly mooned the Monkeys to win by 9 points. Final score, Badasses 103 Ghost Monkeys 94. The third thriller of the week was the celler dweller battle of the Nutcrunchers and the Black Cats. Coach AVG Warhawk was thinking that his lead by Terrific Tom and his 387 yards was enough, but when your opposition is Big Ben, no win is assured. "Don't you have some woman to assault?" Coach Warhawk exclaimed at the end of the game, preferring not to shake hands but to flip off Big Ben. Roethlisberger is listed as probable for next week with hurt feelings, as the Black Cats get their first win 96.23 - 93.19 The surprise winner of the weekend was Coach Casey with his new team, the Guns of Hocculi. Against the traditional high scoring team of Mr Chris and the Helmand Nighthawks, the Guners (or is it the Hockers?) hold the Nighthawks down to earn another surprise win, while moving to the top of the league at 3-0. Next week they play away against a set of Badasses. Slowly and quietly, Coach Rick and the Dragons have slithered to 3-0 and lead the Subsimmers by one game. The Dragons were matched against the high powered Wild Boston Terriers, but the Dragons were too strong on the arm of Matthew Stafford and the hands of Calvin Johnson. "See my first year QB," Coach Rick beamed after the game. "We're aiming for 4," as the Dragons head away to play the Black Cats. Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance. For a convincing win aganst Every Given Sunday (what's happened to them this year?) achieving 254 yards and 4 passing TD's for a total of 27 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Eli Manning of the Reapers with the Week Three MVT.

10-03-11, 11:34 PM	#11
Gut Wrench Watch Officer Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Everywhere Posts: 342 Downloads: 0 Uploads: 0	RODGERS RECORDS ...everything but a win. Week Four in the 2011 Subsim Fantasy Football, and for the second time in two weeks, the Australian Taipans have been in a thriller with the Wild Boston Terriers. We'll get to that game after this public service announcement.. DONATE TO SUBSIM... OR THE TERRORISTS WIN. Seven days ago the Taipans were in front holding onto their lead. This week they had to do it the hardest way possible, against a record breaking score. Aaron Rodgers of the Wild Boston Terriers came out in the second half of the weekend and lit up the scoreboard, scoring 4 touchdowns, 2 rushing touchdowns and 408 yards. Along with his accomplice Greg Jennings the duo scored 71 points of the WBT total score. The Terriers held a narrow lead before the Taipans ran the Jets defense on to the field. "We got lucky and and all the points scored against us, were credited to the offense," Coach Pioneer said. The Taipans snuk ahead with a defensive TD, and late Monday night, Reggie Wayne put the game out of reach. Taipans move to 4-0, and Coach McBee was seen leaving the stadium kicking a trash can down the street. Want another record - it's not that old, you only have to look back at Week 2 to the Ghost Monkeys who scored 154 points against the WBT. This week, the Monkeys made a meal of the 0-3 Nutcrunchers, racking up 166 points, certainly the most points I have ever seen in a game. However the Ghost monkeys sit one game back in the in Sub Simmers division, from, the every quietly achieving Dragons. In week 4 Coach Rick took his highly touted Dragons into the Black Cats House of Purr. Not distracted by the Pussycat Doll cheerleaders, Calvin Johnson and his 24 points lead the Dragons to an easy 131-88 win. Had Johnson got just 3 more yards the Dragons would have scored 140 points and given themselves a weekly average score of 120 points. From the Coaches own mouth, "120 points each week will win you the league." The Dragons will be hoping for another 120 points next week as they go against the Taipans in a top of the ladder clash. The third undefeated team this year, currently sitting at 4-0 in the Surface Skimmers division, Coach Casey's Guns of Hocculi accounted for last years Divisional Winners, the BP Badasses. Despite Gunners QB Kevin Kolb scoring -.21 points for his performance, WR Wes Walker and TE Jimmy Graham lifted the Gunners to their fourth straight week, and a surprising two game lead in the sub simmers division. In the other two games of the week, the 1-2 Delaware Destroyers defeated the less than .500% Reapers, 113 - 82, and scoring their first win of the season, Every Given Sunday defeat the Helmand Nighthawks, 132 - 63. A quarter of the way through the season the table looks like this. In the Sub Simmers division the Dragons at 4-0 have skipped away from the Ghost Monkeys (3-1) and the BP Badasses (2-2). The rest of the division sits at 1-3 In the Surface Skimmers Division, the Guns of Hoculi and the Taipans lead at 4-0, two games clear of the Delaware Destroyers. The Black Cats and Nighthawks are at 1-4, while the Nutcrunchers are the sole team without a win. Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance. After a surprising 0-3 start and sitting at the bottom of the Sub Simmers division, the defense has finally kicked in and brought home the first win of the season. For the effort of 2 sacks, 1 interception, 3 fumble recoveries and 3 defensive touchdowns, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present the Raven Defense of Every Given Sunday with the Week Four MVT.

10-10-11, 10:56 PM	#15
Gut Wrench Watch Officer Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Everywhere Posts: 342 Downloads: 0 Uploads: 0	DRAGONS FIRE with the Gunners smoldering. Week Five in the 2011 Subsim Fantasy Football, and the have stamped their authority on the League, but they don't have it all their own way. We'll get to that game after this public service announcement. NOMINATE SUBSIM FFL REPORTS FOR THIS YEARS "BEST OF SUBSIM". It was the top of the table clash nobody expected. A former League Champion against a foreign up comer, the winner to advance to 5-0 and take a stranglehold on their division. The Dragons and Taipans clash was everything is was billed up to be...until Roddy White and Tony Gonzales got garbage time receptions at the end of Sunday night to reduce the Taipans 40 point lead to less than 20. With Matthew Stafford and Megatron Johnson hooking up for what seemed like a 3 mile touchdown pass, the Dragons moved ahead and dropped the Taipans to 4-1. But the Dragons are not the only undefeated team, The Guns of Hoculi, the new team under Coach Casey, has also moved on to 5-0 in the Subsimmer division soundly accounting for the 1-3 reapers 142 - 79. The Gunners take a one game lead in the division but will meet the Taipans next week in one of the more exciting match ups. Two teams with the most undeserving record of 1-3 lined up against each other. The Wild Boston Terriers, red hot favorites at the start of the season, were facing the Helmand Nighthawks. These teams are off to rough starts, unlike previous years, facing off with a pair of monster rushing backs. The Purple Jesus of the Nighthawks put three touchdowns up against the Terrier's Law Firm of Ben Jarvis Green Ellis 2 TD's. It would be the arm of Aaron Rodgers which finally lifts the Terriers to .500% with a 119-78 win. The Nighthawks fall almost to the bottom of the league. Proving you don't need to be a top tier team to have a great game, Every Given Sunday finally made it home to host the Nutcrunchers. Even with Tom Terrific as QB, the Nutcrunchers are still looking for their first win as the fall to EGS 95-87. After the game Tom was seen sobbing into a pink handkerchief that rumors suspect was once owned by Bridget Moynaham. Sorry Tom, you get to go home and put up with Giesel tonight. They've had some high scores and look to be a legitimate title contender despite sititng at 3-1 before this weeks games. Coach Mookie of the once beloved "Lose by a Point" team with his new Ghost Moonkeys have been handing teams a spanking this year. Week Five was no exception and while not a high scoring game, Dwayne Bowe caught 30 points of the Ghost Monkeys points. It didn't help that the Delaware Destroyers started QB Tony Romo...who stayed at home on a Bye weekend. Monkeys leapfrog up the table to 4-1 winning 88 - 60. Next week they host the Dragons in the game of the week. However, proving that leaving your best player as a starter in a bye week can still get a win, are the Black Cats. The Kitty Cats started Ray Rice this week and despite his absence, managed to rack up 107 points against the BP Basasses. Cats advance to 2-3 but two games back in the Sub Simmer division. Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance. After a slow start in the Sub Simmers division, the arm has finally kicked in. For the effort of 5 touchdowns and 228 yards, scoring a massive 32.06 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Ben Roethlisberger of the Black Cats with the Week Five MVT. [/QUOTE]