The Worst War Movies of All Time

[Kondor77]

Originally Posted by Type941

Enemy At The Gates? Have you seen that one, about the sniper in Stalingrad? Omg. Give me a break!

It is based on a true story, just has the effects of a Hollywood picture. But think about it, its definately not as bad as it could've been. It is still one of my favorites. I mean the opening scenes really capture the brutality of the Eastern Front, and Stalin's order for 'Not one step back'.

And the duel with the other German sniper is also 100% true, just that there was only one encounter and not multiple.

Oh, and the love story, yea its crap, but I tend to ignore that.

[toryu]

Worst war film... h'mmmm..
Any of the Rambo films. Awful, juvenile wastes of celluloid. M60 one-handed. Flimsy Mi24 Hinds. Stallone's inability to keep his t-shirt on, much like a go-go dancer at a gay bar.

Navy Seals (I think that was the name). Macho, one-dimensional faeces. Wooden place-holder characters, outrageously stupid scenes - one of the Seals gets machinegunned - he staves off dying just long enough to pull his crucifix out of his shirt, and kiss it. Then his head drops back, like the tragic heroine of a silent movie. Spew.


Enemy at the Gates. Holy Mother of 12 B@stards, that was a total hound of a picture. Hollywood at its very worst. The occasional eye-catching scene only highlights how bad the rest of it was. Jude Law and Rachel Weisz courting each other in these ridiculous Little Lord Fauntleroy accents:
"Oh Vassily, when shall I see you again?"
"Hush my deah, I shall return from dueling with the Hun forthwith. Toodle-pip!"

Ed Harris looked constantly like he wanted to use that rifle on himself.


Oh, and I hate U571 also. It symbolizes everything that disgusts me about Hollywood. Revionism, juvenility, banality, movie star casts, thin storylines, bad dialogue. And lots and lots of special effects. All tied up in a script written by the sort of bib-wearing maniac who never lets pesky things like facts get in the way of patriotism. The US has enough things to be proud of without having to make things up. Where are the movies about the 5th AF in the Pacific? Or any other number of things?

I'll tell you something else, there's only half as much dialog in movies these days as there was 20 years ago. And the actors mostly suck as well. What makes these dolts into stars? Compare Ben Affleck to someone like Gene Hackman? NO comparison. Hollywood is ripping us off, I tell ya.

[Nagel]

Originally Posted by Gammel

Apocalypse now is one of the best movies ever made,
but i would not call it a war film.

Of course, there´s a war going on in that film.

Also i wouldn´t call it a leftist propaganda film.

I wouldn´t call it an antiwar movie also.

It´s much more...

This film has no easy message in (war is bad, war is good war is cruel, blablabla...)

It´s a masterpiece.

Performed by brilliant actors

Watch it again Nagel, if you like. Do you already have seen the "redux" version?
Use a good TV if possible and good soundequipment...

ok, sorry enough evangelism
and excuse my poor english

I do agree it's a brilliant work, but it's still leftist propaganda. just take that one scene where the can comes in playing Wagner, come on! Wagner for God's sake, and attack the "peaceful" village where the children are sitting down in school? We're portrayed as the invading horde. that movie is a blatent piece of antiwar propaganda. I do love the air cav scene, and I do really really enjoy the redux version. the cinematography, and subtle underplots are intense, but it's still not a "war movie" inasmuch as it dipicts warriors in combat. Das Boot is a great war film, all quiet is a great war film. Anyone who says that Apocolypse is a great war film is too easily impressed by hollywood pyrotechnics.

[Type941]

Originally Posted by Kondor77

It is based on a true story, just has the effects of a Hollywood picture. But think about it, its definately not as bad as it could've been. It is still one of my favorites. I mean the opening scenes really capture the brutality of the Eastern Front, and Stalin's order for 'Not one step back'.

And the duel with the other German sniper is also 100% true, just that there was only one encounter and not multiple.

Oh, and the love story, yea its crap, but I tend to ignore that.

I said what I said because i actually lived in Volgograd (was Stalingrad at the time of war). Volga river doesn't have bloody mountains on its banks, that's for one.

no, of course it's hollywood and I know it's based on true story, and I know there are worse films. But I'm saying this from a perspective of someone who lived in the city portrayed and a lot is bollocks. But since it's a movie, it can be. Pearl Harbour is 120 times worse.

In fact, that Stalingrad battle had quite a number of moments that could have been depicted... The opening scene in boats reminded me of Omaha Beach. That worries me.

[Oberon]

Originally Posted by pampanito

And don't forget 'Battle of the Bulge' with Robert Shaw. Lots of M-48 tanks with black crosses supposing to be Tigers and King Tigers... Best scene is when the Allied brass show a big model of the M-48 in a table... 'That's the German secret weapon etc etc'.
Perfectly blue skies all along the film... Wonder why the Allied air force was grounded. And the stunts were ludicrous.

Finally!!
I spent the entirity of that film thinking to myself "Those German tanks look all wrong....they don't look box like enough to be Panzers!"
Now I can put my sanity to rest

As for U-571...what happened to the British?!!!!
That's one thing that does nark me, getting written out of our own battles...thank god for people who give us gems like Das Boot, or BoB!

Pearl Harbour? The actual bombing was pretty cool, and the Japanese planning the bombing...basically everything bar the stupid love story plot.

[Kondor77]

Originally Posted by Type941

I said what I said because i actually lived in Volgograd (was Stalingrad at the time of war). Volga river doesn't have bloody mountains on its banks, that's for one.

no, of course it's hollywood and I know it's based on true story, and I know there are worse films. But I'm saying this from a perspective of someone who lived in the city portrayed and a lot is bollocks. But since it's a movie, it can be. Pearl Harbour is 120 times worse.

In fact, that Stalingrad battle had quite a number of moments that could have been depicted... The opening scene in boats reminded me of Omaha Beach. That worries me.

Thats pretty cool, I'm planning a trip there hopefully in the next few years .

Can't argue with the geographic misportrayal of the city in the movie, you are also definately correct, with Pearl Harbor being much much much worse. That is why I don't find it necesary to add Enemy at the Gates into the same top 10 list as Pearl Harbor :P

[wetgoat]

Not knowing any better, one of my friends (a real WW2 freak) rented the vhs when it first came out. All we had heard, was the hype about what a great movie it was supposed to be. The entire first tape was 100% CHICK FLICK! Had we known better, we would have discarded the first tape and just started with the pt2 tape. As it was, by the time we got to pt2 , we were both about to puke. I have seen worse movies, but I actually had chipped in on the rental of this garbage. To sum this up, it was my all time worst waste of money on a movie rental.

[zombiewolf]

hey have you seen that rotten one with Mel Gibson trying to be a red neck in Vietnam.
Soo bad can't remember the name.

2 good ones tho based on real life

Audy Murphy "To hell and back"(played himself)

Gary Cooper "Sgt York"

Also remeber one with BOB Newhart where he is a clerk that ends up at the front.
He picks up the phone and pretends he is at the C.O.
talking to a bunch of people(is paul newman in this)

[Catfish]

Hello Nagel,
concerning "Apocalypse now" you wrote :

" ... I do agree it's a brilliant work, but it's still leftist propaganda. just take that one scene where the can comes in playing Wagner, come on! Wagner for God's sake, and attack the "peaceful" village where the children are sitting down in school? We're portrayed as the invading horde. that movie is a blatent piece of antiwar propaganda. I do love the air cav scene, ... "

People don't die in wars, this is all (leftist) propaganda. Maybe they did not play Wagner, but in original camera footages of Vietnam they indeed had mounted loudspeakers, only thing is they mostly played Rock'n roll going in, not Wagner. Why not say it ? A village "proven" to be a vietcong one was mostly erased, collateral damage with civilians. Sh*t happens. How could a frightened 18-year old farmer boy from Idaho possibly decide what to do when they found a gun in a hut in the jungle. Chewing gums when igniting a hut with a Zippo lighter maybe is leftist propaganda, as well as Americans dying at all, i know. (dropping atom bombs over civilian targets including schoolchildren is also leftist propaganda). I do not discuss whether it was necessary to do that, but to call leftist propaganda anything presenting what really happened without showing the US flag every two minutes and having a marine say "Yessir!" - B.S.! Leftist propaganda is something else.
I do not think the film really makes sense in a way the original author really meant, because the book Coppola got the idea from is no military or "leftist" one, Coppoly only transferred the story from another location and time to the far east into a war. And even the hidden story behind within the film is not about war.
Greetings,
Catfish

[Twelvefield]

Originally Posted by Oberon

Pearl Harbour? The actual bombing was pretty cool.

Except, of course, that the bombs fall straight down out of the planes.

Please to see:

http://www.intuitor.com/moviephysics/

... and scroll down to the Pearl Harbor movie review.

[enigma-e]

Thanks, Catfish, you beat me to it. Some people (Nagel, that is) do have a ... shall we say... simple way of viewing the world.

[John Channing]

Ahhh... I see politics has reared it's ugly head once again.

Now where did I put that thread lock key?

JCC

[KodiakPA]

I could stand the lousy chick flick parts of Pearl Harbor, only because of Kate B, but the bombing of modern ships by zeros lost me totaly.

[Type941]

Originally Posted by Twelvefield

Except, of course, that the bombs fall straight down out of the planes.

Please to see:

http://www.intuitor.com/moviephysics/

... and scroll down to the Pearl Harbor movie review.

Eh.. Thanks for that, just killed 1 hour reading the whole page and all them movies. good read, but really, I must sleep now!!!

[FesterShinetop]

After 4 pages I think it's pretty safe to say that Pearl Harbor is considered to be the worst war movie of all time
:rotfl: And it really IS horrible...