Stick to the speed limit when your driving

Jimbuna · 03-07-09, 05:00 PM

Nice one Steve

I'll raise you one

The pope goes to America and gets picked up at the airport by a Cadillac Limo with the windows blacked out. After a while, the driver hears a rapping on the glass partition and winds it down.
'You know, since I was a little boy I've always dreamed of driving a Caddy,' says the pope.

Not wanting to refuse a request by God's representative on Earth, the driver pulls over and they swap places.
The pope has a wonderful time screaming down the freeway at 100mph, but it's not long before blue lights pull the car over. The policeman has words, then returns to his vehicle and gets on the radio.

'Dispatch - you better get me the chief' he whispers.
'Roger that.'

A pause.
'Chief here. What's up?'
'I've just pulled somebody over and I think they're quite important and I don't know what to do,' whispers the policeman.

'You haven't pulled over the mayor again have you?'
'No, I think they're more important than the mayor.'
'The governor?'
'No, I think they're more important than the governor.'

'Oh my god! You haven't pulled over the president have you?'
'No, I think they're more important than the president.'

'WHAT? How can anyone possibly be more important than the president of the United States?'
'I dunno, but he's got the pope as a chauffeur...'

Oberon · 03-07-09, 05:35 PM

Wasn't a Mr Wolf was it Jim?

Sailor Steve · 03-07-09, 05:39 PM

Okay, didn't see that punch line coming!

Jimbuna · 03-08-09, 08:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Oberon

Wasn't a Mr Wolf was it Jim?

LMAO :rotfl:

karamazovnew · 06-06-09, 05:00 AM

A policeman stops a car with broken headlight. Inside are the driver, his mother, and a guy in the backseat.
The policeman says: "Sir did you know that you had a broken headlight?"
The driver says: "Oh that's all? I thought you saw me speeding at 120mph a few kilometers back."
The mother says: "Don't mind him officer, he's drunk."
The guy in the backseat says: "Are you crazy? How could you do that in a stolen car? You wanna' get caught?!"
A voice in the trunk says: " Que? Hombre you locco? What if we get caught at the border?!"
A mobile phone rings: "Osama here. are you there yet? The bomb is set to go up in 15 min, hurry up".

03-07-09, 05:00 PM	#1
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 190,645 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Nice one Steve I'll raise you one The pope goes to America and gets picked up at the airport by a Cadillac Limo with the windows blacked out. After a while, the driver hears a rapping on the glass partition and winds it down. 'You know, since I was a little boy I've always dreamed of driving a Caddy,' says the pope. Not wanting to refuse a request by God's representative on Earth, the driver pulls over and they swap places. The pope has a wonderful time screaming down the freeway at 100mph, but it's not long before blue lights pull the car over. The policeman has words, then returns to his vehicle and gets on the radio. 'Dispatch - you better get me the chief' he whispers. 'Roger that.' A pause. 'Chief here. What's up?' 'I've just pulled somebody over and I think they're quite important and I don't know what to do,' whispers the policeman. 'You haven't pulled over the mayor again have you?' 'No, I think they're more important than the mayor.' 'The governor?' 'No, I think they're more important than the governor.' 'Oh my god! You haven't pulled over the president have you?' 'No, I think they're more important than the president.' 'WHAT? How can anyone possibly be more important than the president of the United States?' 'I dunno, but he's got the pope as a chauffeur...' __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!

03-07-09, 05:39 PM	#3
Sailor Steve Eternal Patrol Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: High in the mountains of Utah Posts: 50,369 Downloads: 745 Uploads: 249	Okay, didn't see that punch line coming! __________________ “Never do anything you can't take back.” —Rocky Russo

03-07-09, 05:35 PM	#2
Oberon Lucky Jack Join Date: Jul 2002 Posts: 25,976 Downloads: 61 Uploads: 20	Wasn't a Mr Wolf was it Jim?

06-06-09, 05:00 AM	#5
karamazovnew The Old Man Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Bucharest, Romania Posts: 1,403 Downloads: 151 Uploads: 0	A policeman stops a car with broken headlight. Inside are the driver, his mother, and a guy in the backseat. The policeman says: "Sir did you know that you had a broken headlight?" The driver says: "Oh that's all? I thought you saw me speeding at 120mph a few kilometers back." The mother says: "Don't mind him officer, he's drunk." The guy in the backseat says: "Are you crazy? How could you do that in a stolen car? You wanna' get caught?!" A voice in the trunk says: " Que? Hombre you locco? What if we get caught at the border?!" A mobile phone rings: "Osama here. are you there yet? The bomb is set to go up in 15 min, hurry up".