I Hate My Neighbors And I Want Them To Die

[Kapitan_Phillips]

There is this house at the end of my street with a crummy dog kennel at the end of it; like a shack. Anyway this jerk keeps about 6 dogs in there, 24/7.

So anyway I usually sleep with the window open (I much prefer the room being cold) and I was merrily away dreaming about cakes and whatnot, when I was awoken from my slumber by incessant barking and whining.

"Not really a problem" I thought "They'll shut up in a minute".

Half an hour later, bark bark bark whine bark.

""

bark bark bark whine bark

So I leaned out of the window and bellowed at the top of my voice "SHUT UP!!" which earned me about a 20 minute reprieve, but again, bark bark bark whine bark

So up I get, I throw on the clothes nearest me, a pair of jeans and an old shirt. On go my shoes and I stomp out of the front door in the bitter cold and right down to this assclown's house.

<KNOCK KNOCK>

Nothing.

<KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK>

The door opens to reveal a middle aged scruffy looking git who was evidently blissfully unaware of the infuriating cacophany outside.

"Are those your dogs?"
"Yeah."
"They've been barking and whining constantly for just over an hour. Cant you hear them?"
"Oh have they?" he replied flippantly, giving me a look like he had just had an especially large pineapple forceably inserted into his rectum.
"Yes. How you havent heard them is beyond my comprehension at this hour, but rest assured that nobody on this street appreciates that <beep>ing noise, and your failure to do anything about it"

He then started to close the door, flipping me off in the process. I wrapped up by saying

"I have an air rifle in my attic, and if I get kept awake for an hour again, I'll go get it. And I wont be shooting the <bleep>ing dogs."

Anyway, long story short; people can be real ignorant jerks.