Joke Thread - Page 2

antikristuseke · 12-09-10, 02:12 PM

Alzheimers is not a disease, it is a way of meeting exiting new people every day without ever leaving the retirement home.

Sailor Steve · 12-09-10, 02:14 PM

I started a joke.

It started the whole world crying.

Too late did I see that the joke was on me.

Jimbuna · 12-10-10, 08:44 AM

Outrageous, the student protesters attacked Prince Charles car and a helpless looking horse.
Prince Charles was reported to be fine, but Camilla was a little shaken ...

Sailor Steve · 12-11-10, 11:54 PM

This hyar's a hillbilly joke. If'n any of y'all are offended...well, I don't think anybody who'd be offended could actually read, so who cares?

Luke and Rufus meet each other on a bridge. Noticing the bag in Luke's hand, Rufus asks "Hey, Luke, watcha got in t' bag?"

Luke answers "Some baby pigs."

Rufus: "How many?"

Luke: "I tell ya what. If you can guess, I'll give ya both of 'em."

Rufus thinks for a minute and asks "Five?"

Jimbuna · 12-12-10, 12:51 PM

How can the world end in 2012, if i have a Yogurt that expires in 2013?

12-12-10, 06:58 PM

The Humane Society of America was trying to outlaw those Round bales of Hay you see everywhere.
They claimed animals were not getting a Square meal.

Those against this proved the animals were still getting a well rounded diet.

Platapus · 12-12-10, 07:35 PM

As I posted on another thread:

A truckload of Viagra was stolen.

Police are looking for hardened criminals

State prosecutors threaten stiff penalties

12-12-10, 07:49 PM

Hospitals are being notified to watch for erections lasting longer then 4 hours.

If I had that problem?
I'd be calling the News Stations bragging!

Jimbuna · 12-12-10, 08:38 PM

I gave an elderly rabbit a Viagra but it died.
I guess old rabbits die hard.

Platapus · 12-12-10, 09:19 PM

I made the mistake of taking Viagra at the same time I was taking my iron supplements.

Now every time I want sex I point to North.

Jimbuna · 12-13-10, 07:39 AM

A guy goes to his pharmacy and asks for a pack of Viagra.

"Do you have a prescription?" the pharmacist asks.

"No, but here's a picture of my wife." he replied.

12-09-10, 02:14 PM	#17
Sailor Steve Eternal Patrol Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: High in the mountains of Utah Posts: 50,369 Downloads: 745 Uploads: 249	I started a joke. It started the whole world crying. Too late did I see that the joke was on me. __________________ “Never do anything you can't take back.” —Rocky Russo

12-10-10, 08:44 AM	#18
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 190,526 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Outrageous, the student protesters attacked Prince Charles car and a helpless looking horse. Prince Charles was reported to be fine, but Camilla was a little shaken ... __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!

12-11-10, 11:54 PM	#19
Sailor Steve Eternal Patrol Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: High in the mountains of Utah Posts: 50,369 Downloads: 745 Uploads: 249	This hyar's a hillbilly joke. If'n any of y'all are offended...well, I don't think anybody who'd be offended could actually read, so who cares? Luke and Rufus meet each other on a bridge. Noticing the bag in Luke's hand, Rufus asks "Hey, Luke, watcha got in t' bag?" Luke answers "Some baby pigs." Rufus: "How many?" Luke: "I tell ya what. If you can guess, I'll give ya both of 'em." Rufus thinks for a minute and asks "Five?" __________________ “Never do anything you can't take back.” —Rocky Russo

12-12-10, 12:51 PM	#20
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 190,526 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	How can the world end in 2012, if i have a Yogurt that expires in 2013? __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!

12-12-10, 07:35 PM	#22
Platapus Fleet Admiral Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 19,365 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 0	As I posted on another thread: A truckload of Viagra was stolen. Police are looking for hardened criminals State prosecutors threaten stiff penalties __________________ abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right.

12-09-10, 02:12 PM	#16
antikristuseke Silent Hunter Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Estland Posts: 4,330 Downloads: 3 Uploads: 0	Alzheimers is not a disease, it is a way of meeting exiting new people every day without ever leaving the retirement home.

12-12-10, 06:58 PM	#21
Madox58 Stowaway Posts: n/a Downloads: Uploads:	The Humane Society of America was trying to outlaw those Round bales of Hay you see everywhere. They claimed animals were not getting a Square meal. Those against this proved the animals were still getting a well rounded diet.

12-12-10, 07:49 PM	#23
Madox58 Stowaway Posts: n/a Downloads: Uploads:	Hospitals are being notified to watch for erections lasting longer then 4 hours. If I had that problem? I'd be calling the News Stations bragging!

12-12-10, 08:38 PM	#24
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 190,526 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	I gave an elderly rabbit a Viagra but it died. I guess old rabbits die hard. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!

12-12-10, 09:19 PM	#25
Platapus Fleet Admiral Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 19,365 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 0	I made the mistake of taking Viagra at the same time I was taking my iron supplements. Now every time I want sex I point to North. __________________ abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right.

12-13-10, 07:39 AM	#26
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 190,526 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	A guy goes to his pharmacy and asks for a pack of Viagra. "Do you have a prescription?" the pharmacist asks. "No, but here's a picture of my wife." he replied. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!