How to tell if your kid is a hacker

the_tyrant · 10-08-10, 09:07 PM

Quote:

"I had no idea my kid was doing bad things on the computer, until the FBI showed up at my house one day with their guns drawn..."

if you want to avoid that^^ you should read this guide:
http://www.antionline.com/fightback/...s_A_Hacker.php
its a bit old, but still the best guide to see if your kid is a hacker

Chad · 10-08-10, 09:10 PM

Hmm, broken link unless this is a test.

If a kid could get around this by getting into the site's FTP and tracing move logs by web admins for the site, he could then point out the real article and lickity-split.

BRILLIANT

TLAM Strike · 10-08-10, 09:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chad

Hmm, broken link unless this is a test.

Then I must have past...

I simply googled:

How_Can_I_Tell_If_My_Kid_Is_A_Hacker.php

and got the webpage as the first result...

Quote:

Your kid has a talent. Make them put it towards something productive. Forcing them to volunteer at a community center, or the local library, where there are computers set up for public use, is a great way to direct their talents, as well as a way to let them see the satisfaction that comes with doing something positive.

Library? What about the NSA? They need good people...

EDIT: the tyrant you were missing a hyphen the correct URL is

http://www.antionline.com/fight-back...s_A_Hacker.php

CaptainMattJ. · 10-08-10, 10:21 PM

when i lived with my mom shed come up the steps and hear me typing and always suspect im watching porn or something. when in fact, i played alot of video games which = alot of type chatting.
she was always paranoid.

antikristuseke · 10-08-10, 10:29 PM

Why the hell would anyone be typing while watching porn?

TLAM Strike · 10-08-10, 10:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by antikristuseke

Why the hell would anyone be typing while watching porn?

Obviously you have never heard of a webcam show...

antikristuseke · 10-08-10, 10:42 PM

If I wanted the object of my sexual desire to answer back I would'nt chloroform them first.

kiwi_2005 · 10-08-10, 11:14 PM

How to spot a Hacker
Hackers have been known to have red symbols on their cheeks resembling acne, overweight problems, horrible taste in clothes, dorks in real life/"ghetto" in the internet, and gibberish for vocabulary. Sure, this makes it sound like they stand out easily, but if we put a hacker in a group of 3 people, you would expect to see 4 people. We here also thought that there would be 4, which was a surprise to us once we underwent this experiment. Only 3 people were there after we let the hacker blend in. This could be either because one of them was a player and the hacker "pwn'd" him, or he used his well-known power to bypass security protocols and override automatic system applications with the use of CMOS. Therefore, they can easily make it seem that they're not really there, which makes it so they blend right in.

Known Habitats of hackers
Hackers have been known to live in the basements of seemingly-abandoned houses. Some even go as far as living with their own parents past the age of 30, and so they can never score with females. Some scientists also go as far as saying that Hackers have been found lurking in Internet Cafés and College Libraries using their computers, but it's common sense knowing when scientists are exaggerating. I mean, really! Hackers in Internet cafés? I know they have a human appearance, but blending in with the crowd is just absurd!

What do hackers do?

Hackers meet other hackers on IRC, at which point one of them will pretend to be Angelina Jolie or any other hot babe and proceed to have cybersex with other hackers. Scientists have never been able to find how hackers engage in cybersex until this date. But what is known till now, during cybersex, another hacker inserts his 3 1/2" Floppy into the one pretending to be the hot babe's Floppy Drive. The other present hackers continue their own business, orthey proceed to prey on the non-babe as if he was a player, and then they take his place. This has been a theory since the early days when the first hacker was seen prowling in the wilderness hunting for unsuspecting players. When an open hole in the Firewall is found, a connection is made and Shellcode will be injected. This shellcode will install Spyware that will weaken the player's firewall and virus protection, and they will also be able to literally spy on the player's every move (scientists discovered hackers cannot watch Steven Segal pictures. Steven Segal was well-known in the hacker population for the Hacker Genocide in the early 90's). When the hacker has no more use for the player, he leeches all the valuable info he got off of the player, and replaces the info with a virus, which practically destroys the player's computer. This has been known to be how hackers feed for more than a decade. Another thing hackers do to pass the time is write exploits. (Not just the word, though. They've tried that and it gets boring after a few days). They write little computer programs designed to read other people's email. This way they can steal their prizes for winning an event and find out their location so they can prey on the players like Wildebeest on a crocodile feeding frenzy! The bastards! They will then brag about this on their IRC. Here's an example of how hackers interact with one another:

http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Hackers

Chad · 10-09-10, 11:11 AM

Hehe thanks Tyrant for the read. I was just giving you a hard-time

clive bradbury · 10-10-10, 06:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by antikristuseke

Why the hell would anyone be typing while watching porn?

I can type with one hand...

10-08-10, 09:10 PM	#2
Chad ACE Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Kansas City Posts: 1,274 Downloads: 60 Uploads: 0	Hmm, broken link unless this is a test. If a kid could get around this by getting into the site's FTP and tracing move logs by web admins for the site, he could then point out the real article and lickity-split. BRILLIANT __________________

10-08-10, 10:21 PM	#4
CaptainMattJ. The Old Man Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Sin City Posts: 1,364 Downloads: 55 Uploads: 0	when i lived with my mom shed come up the steps and hear me typing and always suspect im watching porn or something. when in fact, i played alot of video games which = alot of type chatting. she was always paranoid. __________________ A popular Government without popular information nor the means of acquiring it, is but a Prologue to a Farce or a Tragedy or perhaps both. Knowledge will forever govern ignorance, and a people who mean to be their own Governors must arm themselves with the power knowledge gives - James Madison

10-08-10, 11:14 PM	#8
kiwi_2005 Eternal Patrol Join Date: May 2004 Location: Aeoteroa Posts: 7,382 Downloads: 223 Uploads: 1	How to spot a Hacker Hackers have been known to have red symbols on their cheeks resembling acne, overweight problems, horrible taste in clothes, dorks in real life/"ghetto" in the internet, and gibberish for vocabulary. Sure, this makes it sound like they stand out easily, but if we put a hacker in a group of 3 people, you would expect to see 4 people. We here also thought that there would be 4, which was a surprise to us once we underwent this experiment. Only 3 people were there after we let the hacker blend in. This could be either because one of them was a player and the hacker "pwn'd" him, or he used his well-known power to bypass security protocols and override automatic system applications with the use of CMOS. Therefore, they can easily make it seem that they're not really there, which makes it so they blend right in. Known Habitats of hackers Hackers have been known to live in the basements of seemingly-abandoned houses. Some even go as far as living with their own parents past the age of 30, and so they can never score with females. Some scientists also go as far as saying that Hackers have been found lurking in Internet Cafés and College Libraries using their computers, but it's common sense knowing when scientists are exaggerating. I mean, really! Hackers in Internet cafés? I know they have a human appearance, but blending in with the crowd is just absurd! What do hackers do? Hackers meet other hackers on IRC, at which point one of them will pretend to be Angelina Jolie or any other hot babe and proceed to have cybersex with other hackers. Scientists have never been able to find how hackers engage in cybersex until this date. But what is known till now, during cybersex, another hacker inserts his 3 1/2" Floppy into the one pretending to be the hot babe's Floppy Drive. The other present hackers continue their own business, orthey proceed to prey on the non-babe as if he was a player, and then they take his place. This has been a theory since the early days when the first hacker was seen prowling in the wilderness hunting for unsuspecting players. When an open hole in the Firewall is found, a connection is made and Shellcode will be injected. This shellcode will install Spyware that will weaken the player's firewall and virus protection, and they will also be able to literally spy on the player's every move (scientists discovered hackers cannot watch Steven Segal pictures. Steven Segal was well-known in the hacker population for the Hacker Genocide in the early 90's). When the hacker has no more use for the player, he leeches all the valuable info he got off of the player, and replaces the info with a virus, which practically destroys the player's computer. This has been known to be how hackers feed for more than a decade. Another thing hackers do to pass the time is write exploits. (Not just the word, though. They've tried that and it gets boring after a few days). They write little computer programs designed to read other people's email. This way they can steal their prizes for winning an event and find out their location so they can prey on the players like Wildebeest on a crocodile feeding frenzy! The bastards! They will then brag about this on their IRC. Here's an example of how hackers interact with one another: http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Hackers __________________ RIP kiwi_2005 Those who can't laugh at themselves leave the job to others.

10-09-10, 11:11 AM	#9
Chad ACE Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Kansas City Posts: 1,274 Downloads: 60 Uploads: 0	Hehe thanks Tyrant for the read. I was just giving you a hard-time __________________

10-08-10, 10:29 PM	#5
antikristuseke Silent Hunter Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Estland Posts: 4,330 Downloads: 3 Uploads: 0	Why the hell would anyone be typing while watching porn?

10-08-10, 10:42 PM	#7
antikristuseke Silent Hunter Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Estland Posts: 4,330 Downloads: 3 Uploads: 0	If I wanted the object of my sexual desire to answer back I would'nt chloroform them first.