Is it wrong?

BossMark · 09-30-13, 07:17 AM

To date someone 20 years younger then yourself?

On my recent trip to Majorca I bumped (literally) into a very attractive Ukrainian girl we got talking even though her English was very good but my Russian is crap I only know 2 words. But we got on very well so we exchanged email addresses. And now she wants me to go and stay with her for a while I tried to explain our age difference but she will have none of it, so I might\want to give into her, but she as a great personality and a figure to die for and by far the best looking women that's ever approached me, I have told my family nothing of this, so I am asking what you guys and gals think.

I will post a picture of her on the beautiful women thread or the photography thread in the near future but not yet.

kranz · 09-30-13, 07:22 AM

I'd say "go for it".
The worst thing that can happen to you is catching Ukrainian AIDS which is a much better situation than getting butchered by Ukrainian mafia.
So, remember: go for it - but on your ground.

on a more serious note - I'm not an expert but 20 years is a huuuge difference.

Wolferz · 09-30-13, 07:32 AM

If you're old enough to know better but still young enough to do something about it, I say go have some fun. Be on your guard though.

Do let your family know that you are going to visit a "friend" in case something unfortunate happens and you need Interpol to find you.

Red October1984 · 09-30-13, 07:34 AM

In my opinion, there's a gray area here.

My advice (for what it's worth) be careful.

Armistead · 09-30-13, 07:48 AM

Very beautiful
Very young

I would suspect motive, so be careful. Course, they're lots of beautiful women trying to marry outside their nations for numerous reasons. There was a man in my old neighborhood that got him a mail ordered bride from Russia. He was in his 40's, she was about 25. We thought him joking until he went over there and brought her back. It cost him about 25K total. Honestly, she was beauty to behold. THey actually had a great marriage for 3 years or so, but she finally left him once she became americanized.

Herr-Berbunch · 09-30-13, 08:07 AM

Let's be honest, you have come here to ask our opinion, you've come to show off.

I'll second the go-for-it-but-with-caution route.

I know a few people with brides from Belize and Thailand, all long, successful marriages, and some age differences. Don't know about Ukrainians though.

bertieck476 · 09-30-13, 08:08 AM

Citizenship does spring to mind, maybe enjoy it but be careful not to get hurt.

Herr-Berbunch · 09-30-13, 08:15 AM

Can you get Leeds to play a friendly with Dynamo Kiev and go as a taster?

AVGWarhawk · 09-30-13, 09:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Armistead

Very beautiful
Very young

I would suspect motive, so be careful. Course, they're lots of beautiful women trying to marry outside their nations for numerous reasons. There was a man in my old neighborhood that got him a mail ordered bride from Russia. He was in his 40's, she was about 25. We thought him joking until he went over there and brought her back. It cost him about 25K total. Honestly, she was beauty to behold. THey actually had a great marriage for 3 years or so, but she finally left him once she became americanized.

The most sound advise I have read yet.

Jimbuna · 09-30-13, 10:12 AM

Be sure to get yourself micro chipped...should help in the search for your body later.

Aktungbby · 10-01-13, 10:58 AM

Be in your best underwear(for the hospital) have your defibrillator fully charged and RUN! What was once thunder in the left and light'n in the right is now dunder in the cleft and fizzle in the bight

This is the old badger game play on your libido and after she scores your sheks:

Axiom: What goes on in Majorca...STAYS in Majorca!

GoldenRivet · 10-01-13, 01:33 PM

On the one hand you should follow your heart.

My personal experience: I did just that, i dated someone just twelve years my junior and it was the absolute worst experience of my life, and to be bluntly honest... im fortunate to have not blown my brains out. seriously. Im quite literally being serious there...

The age gap meant that our taste in music, our taste in movies, our taste in activities etc were completely different. She had not reached the level of maturity in her life nor had she the life experience that one has in order to become someone in their mid thirties and i had not any ability to go back in time to be someone in their early twenties.

The result is a lack of common experience, ultimately the only thing you end up having in common is sex. or perhaps sex and your love of Italian food or any other insignificant thing upon which to base a relationship. And while the sex might be mind blowing, and while it is a fact that a woman 10-20 years your junior can keep you completely emptied if you know what i mean... there is no substance to the relationship. Ultimately, it devolves to its lowest common denominator of screwing, fighting - quite vehemently about something upon which you differ (there will be these things daily) and then "make up sex". Rinse wash repeat - every day - until one of you walks away from the situation.

When i dated this particular person, I felt out of place around her friends because i didnt know the latest lady gaga gossip or whatever, She hated my friends because she couldn't related to them, i felt ridiculous trying to pull all nighters at bars and clubs with her. Come 1am - like clock work i was ready to go home and call it a night, and sometimes the result was just that... her on the other hand; absent and incommunicado until 4 in the morning.

On the other hand, some of the more cultured things i enjoyed like wine tasting, or enjoying cocktails in a jazzy cigar bar, or watching a classic movie... these grew to be things she was quickly bored with.

Ultimately, instead of embracing our differences as fun and quirky, we grew to hate the very things about one another that made us both who we are, and as a result we quite literally hated one another by the end of it.

We constantly argued - sometimes it was stupid things, other times not. But i was always being told how "Old" or "outdated" my music, my taste in movies, my taste in clothing, my manner of speaking etc was, and the end result of most arguments was generally some young woman locking herself in *my* room blasting some horrible excuse for music out of *my* stereo until she felt relieved enough to stop on her own accord.

I had one friend who was in a similar situation as i, we occasionally double dated. we both felt like babysitters, and the feeling of eyes all around the room looking at he and I was like a weight. It didnt take long for me to become ashamed of the fact that i was a 33 year old man dating a 22 year old woman.

In the end, after a particularly rough week, i simply had to drive her stuff to her moms house where she was visiting for the weekend, I put it all on her front porch and called her on my 2 hour drive home just to say "Your things are out front, Im not coming back." and thus closed the chapter on one entire year of my life. one whole year i would love to have completely erased... but a year that i know that i'm better for having remembered because I learned some important lessons, here are some of the most important

1. Life is too short to spend a single second surrounding yourself with people who are unhealthy for you. This for me includes dating women who are 5 or more years my junior of 5 or more years my senior.

2. Red flags pop up in your mind for a reason... no matter how rose colored the glasses are through which you view the other person, MIND THE RED FLAGS. Its your brains way of saying, look dummy... this aint right.

3. my twenties were a blast of a good time... i am well into my thirties now. I am not now, nor will i ever be that person again, and that is a good thing, i should embrace that, and surround myself with people who have experienced it themselves.

4. Relationships must be built upon trust, reliability, respect, common experience, patience, understanding etc. If you try to make it work with someone with whom you have little or no common experience - it is very likely doomed to fail from the start. For that reason, i have decided not to date women outside my age, race, or from a dissimilar socioeconomic condition.

5. Always be willing to accept the pain of getting the hell out of a situation. I was very upset about having to end the relationship i was in, but i knew that the pain was temporary and would end, and the next thing would be great and i was right.

generally speaking, i think dating someone outside your age group is a pretty rotten idea, and unless you find that 1 woman out of millions of them who - while being 20 years your junior - is still wise beyond her years, such relationships are rarely going to work out well

Bubblehead1980 · 09-30-13, 02:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BossMark

To date someone 20 years younger then yourself?

On my recent trip to Majorca I bumped (literally) into a very attractive Ukrainian girl we got talking even though her English was very good but my Russian is crap I only know 2 words. But we got on very well so we exchanged email addresses. And now she wants me to go and stay with her for a while I tried to explain our age difference but she will have none of it, so I might\want to give into her, but she as a great personality and a figure to die for and by far the best looking women that's ever approached me, I have told my family nothing of this, so I am asking what you guys and gals think.

I will post a picture of her on the beautiful women thread or the photography thread in the near future but not yet.

Not wrong, go for it, just be careful.

BossMark · 10-01-13, 03:03 AM

This is Svetochka

Oh boy I am still not sure what to do

TarJak · 10-01-13, 03:23 AM

Someone once told me that something that sounds too good to be true probably is.

Have a squint at this before making up your mind http://m.imdb.com/title/tt0188453/
The movie not just the IMDB page.

09-30-13, 07:17 AM	#1
BossMark Fleet Admiral Join Date: May 2011 Location: Leeds, West Yorkshire Posts: 15,272 Downloads: 278 Uploads: 0	Is it wrong? To date someone 20 years younger then yourself? On my recent trip to Majorca I bumped (literally) into a very attractive Ukrainian girl we got talking even though her English was very good but my Russian is crap I only know 2 words. But we got on very well so we exchanged email addresses. And now she wants me to go and stay with her for a while I tried to explain our age difference but she will have none of it, so I might\want to give into her, but she as a great personality and a figure to die for and by far the best looking women that's ever approached me, I have told my family nothing of this, so I am asking what you guys and gals think. I will post a picture of her on the beautiful women thread or the photography thread in the near future but not yet. __________________ Never trust the Tories look what Thatcher and Major did in the 80s and 90s and look what the wicked witch May is doing now doing now

09-30-13, 07:32 AM	#3
Wolferz Navy Seal Join Date: May 2007 Location: On a mighty quest for the Stick of Truth Posts: 5,963 Downloads: 52 Uploads: 0	If you're old enough to know better but still young enough to do something about it, I say go have some fun. Be on your guard though. Do let your family know that you are going to visit a "friend" in case something unfortunate happens and you need Interpol to find you. __________________ Tomorrow never comes

09-30-13, 07:34 AM	#4
Red October1984 Airplane Nerd Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: Texas Posts: 6,243 Downloads: 115 Uploads: 0	In my opinion, there's a gray area here. My advice (for what it's worth) be careful. __________________

09-30-13, 07:48 AM	#5
Armistead Rear Admiral Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: on the Dan Posts: 10,880 Downloads: 364 Uploads: 0	Very beautiful Very young I would suspect motive, so be careful. Course, they're lots of beautiful women trying to marry outside their nations for numerous reasons. There was a man in my old neighborhood that got him a mail ordered bride from Russia. He was in his 40's, she was about 25. We thought him joking until he went over there and brought her back. It cost him about 25K total. Honestly, she was beauty to behold. THey actually had a great marriage for 3 years or so, but she finally left him once she became americanized. __________________ You see my dog don't like people laughing. He gets the crazy idea you're laughing at him. Now if you apologize like I know you're going to, I might convince him that you really didn't mean it.

09-30-13, 08:07 AM	#6
Herr-Berbunch Kaiser Bill's batman Join Date: May 2010 Location: AN72 Posts: 13,203 Downloads: 76 Uploads: 0	Let's be honest, you have come here to ask our opinion, you've come to show off. I'll second the go-for-it-but-with-caution route. I know a few people with brides from Belize and Thailand, all long, successful marriages, and some age differences. Don't know about Ukrainians though. __________________

09-30-13, 07:22 AM	#2
kranz The Old Man Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Poland Posts: 1,430 Downloads: 5 Uploads: 0	I'd say "go for it". The worst thing that can happen to you is catching Ukrainian AIDS which is a much better situation than getting butchered by Ukrainian mafia. So, remember: go for it - but on your ground. on a more serious note - I'm not an expert but 20 years is a huuuge difference.

09-30-13, 08:08 AM	#7
bertieck476 Chief Join Date: Mar 2010 Posts: 327 Downloads: 33 Uploads: 0	Citizenship does spring to mind, maybe enjoy it but be careful not to get hurt.

09-30-13, 08:15 AM	#8
Herr-Berbunch Kaiser Bill's batman Join Date: May 2010 Location: AN72 Posts: 13,203 Downloads: 76 Uploads: 0	Can you get Leeds to play a friendly with Dynamo Kiev and go as a taster? __________________

09-30-13, 10:12 AM	#10
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 190,500 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Be sure to get yourself micro chipped...should help in the search for your body later. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!

10-01-13, 10:58 AM	#11
Aktungbby Gefallen Engel U-666 Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: On a tilted, overheated, overpopulated spinning mudball on Collision course with Andromeda Galaxy Posts: 29,993 Downloads: 24 Uploads: 0	Be in your best underwear(for the hospital) have your defibrillator fully charged and RUN! What was once thunder in the left and light'n in the right is now dunder in the cleft and fizzle in the bightThis is the old badger game play on your libido and after she scores your sheks:Axiom: What goes on in Majorca...STAYS in Majorca! __________________ "Only two things are infinite; The Universe and human squirrelyness?!! Last edited by Aktungbby; 10-02-13 at 01:05 PM.

10-01-13, 01:33 PM	#12
GoldenRivet Subsim Aviator Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Texas Posts: 8,726 Downloads: 146 Uploads: 0	On the one hand you should follow your heart. My personal experience: I did just that, i dated someone just twelve years my junior and it was the absolute worst experience of my life, and to be bluntly honest... im fortunate to have not blown my brains out. seriously. Im quite literally being serious there... The age gap meant that our taste in music, our taste in movies, our taste in activities etc were completely different. She had not reached the level of maturity in her life nor had she the life experience that one has in order to become someone in their mid thirties and i had not any ability to go back in time to be someone in their early twenties. The result is a lack of common experience, ultimately the only thing you end up having in common is sex. or perhaps sex and your love of Italian food or any other insignificant thing upon which to base a relationship. And while the sex might be mind blowing, and while it is a fact that a woman 10-20 years your junior can keep you completely emptied if you know what i mean... there is no substance to the relationship. Ultimately, it devolves to its lowest common denominator of screwing, fighting - quite vehemently about something upon which you differ (there will be these things daily) and then "make up sex". Rinse wash repeat - every day - until one of you walks away from the situation. When i dated this particular person, I felt out of place around her friends because i didnt know the latest lady gaga gossip or whatever, She hated my friends because she couldn't related to them, i felt ridiculous trying to pull all nighters at bars and clubs with her. Come 1am - like clock work i was ready to go home and call it a night, and sometimes the result was just that... her on the other hand; absent and incommunicado until 4 in the morning. On the other hand, some of the more cultured things i enjoyed like wine tasting, or enjoying cocktails in a jazzy cigar bar, or watching a classic movie... these grew to be things she was quickly bored with. Ultimately, instead of embracing our differences as fun and quirky, we grew to hate the very things about one another that made us both who we are, and as a result we quite literally hated one another by the end of it. We constantly argued - sometimes it was stupid things, other times not. But i was always being told how "Old" or "outdated" my music, my taste in movies, my taste in clothing, my manner of speaking etc was, and the end result of most arguments was generally some young woman locking herself in my room blasting some horrible excuse for music out of my stereo until she felt relieved enough to stop on her own accord. I had one friend who was in a similar situation as i, we occasionally double dated. we both felt like babysitters, and the feeling of eyes all around the room looking at he and I was like a weight. It didnt take long for me to become ashamed of the fact that i was a 33 year old man dating a 22 year old woman. In the end, after a particularly rough week, i simply had to drive her stuff to her moms house where she was visiting for the weekend, I put it all on her front porch and called her on my 2 hour drive home just to say "Your things are out front, Im not coming back." and thus closed the chapter on one entire year of my life. one whole year i would love to have completely erased... but a year that i know that i'm better for having remembered because I learned some important lessons, here are some of the most important 1. Life is too short to spend a single second surrounding yourself with people who are unhealthy for you. This for me includes dating women who are 5 or more years my junior of 5 or more years my senior. 2. Red flags pop up in your mind for a reason... no matter how rose colored the glasses are through which you view the other person, MIND THE RED FLAGS. Its your brains way of saying, look dummy... this aint right. 3. my twenties were a blast of a good time... i am well into my thirties now. I am not now, nor will i ever be that person again, and that is a good thing, i should embrace that, and surround myself with people who have experienced it themselves. 4. Relationships must be built upon trust, reliability, respect, common experience, patience, understanding etc. If you try to make it work with someone with whom you have little or no common experience - it is very likely doomed to fail from the start. For that reason, i have decided not to date women outside my age, race, or from a dissimilar socioeconomic condition. 5. Always be willing to accept the pain of getting the hell out of a situation. I was very upset about having to end the relationship i was in, but i knew that the pain was temporary and would end, and the next thing would be great and i was right. generally speaking, i think dating someone outside your age group is a pretty rotten idea, and unless you find that 1 woman out of millions of them who - while being 20 years your junior - is still wise beyond her years, such relationships are rarely going to work out well __________________

10-01-13, 03:03 AM	#14
BossMark Fleet Admiral Join Date: May 2011 Location: Leeds, West Yorkshire Posts: 15,272 Downloads: 278 Uploads: 0	This is Svetochka Oh boy I am still not sure what to do __________________ Never trust the Tories look what Thatcher and Major did in the 80s and 90s and look what the wicked witch May is doing now doing now

10-01-13, 03:23 AM	#15
TarJak Fleet Admiral Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Sydney, Australia Posts: 17,052 Downloads: 150 Uploads: 8	Someone once told me that something that sounds too good to be true probably is. Have a squint at this before making up your mind http://m.imdb.com/title/tt0188453/ The movie not just the IMDB page. Last edited by TarJak; 10-01-13 at 07:09 AM.