SH3 Glossary of Terms

[GoldenRivet]

ALARM! – an exclamation, usually shouted quite loudly when either in port or while sailing in waters of less than 20 meters depth.

ASDIC – a song, comprised mostly of sharp tones followed by deep booms which is played during Kriegsmarine funerals.

BALLAST TANKS – Tanks aboard the boat which mysteriously fill with air during a submerged attack on a well escorted convoy in broad daylight.

BAY OF BISCAY – the Kriegsmarine version of Arlington national cemetery

BLOW BALLAST – A slang term for a debriefing in which a commander who sank 10,000 tons of enemy shipping reports that he sank 30,000 tons of enemy shipping.

BOW – a type of probe on the front of a U-boat used for detecting whether the sea bed is made of mud, sand, rock or a mixture of all three, see also ALARM!

BDU – the german abbreviation for “Be More Aggressive”.

BOLD – the emotion which overcomes young u-boat commanders when they get their first command assignment in 1943, bold quickly turns to fear or frustration

BROADSIDE – a situation which allows a u-boat commander to know – beyond any doubt – that the enemy is aware of his presence.

CONTACT – 1. A sighted ship or ships which are travelling 5 knots faster than your own maximum speed 2. A reported target that will take at least 5 days to reach at maximum speed, 3. A reported target that is 100 miles beyond your maximum range.

DECKS AWASH – the procedure followed immediately AFTER return to port, yet immediately BEFORE a jaunt to a local French whore house. Experienced sailors follow this procedure again upon returning from the local French whore house.

ENIGMA – A top secret British device used to give away a surfaced u-boats position

FLANK SPEED – an engine speed setting that generally equates to 5 knots slower than the target’s speed.

GREAT CIRCLE ROUTE – a euphemism used to describe a route between two points in SH3 which would be shorter in real life, but is in fact many times longer than in real life.

GROSS REGISTERED TONNAGE – A ships registered displacement, subtract 25% during post patrol debriefings.

KALEUN – A decorative dummy that adorns the bridge of a u-boat.

KEEL – the area beneath a ship under which magnetic trigger torpedoes can safely pass without causing any damage to anything.

LEUTNANT ZUR SEE – A Kriegsmarine officer who is generally seeing the ocean for the first time.

LOGBOOK – A book aboard a u-boat used exclusively for recording aircraft sightings and crash dives.

LUFTWAFFE – A rare and often elusive breed of birds which travel in flocks of 2 or more. They can most often be spotted pointlessly circling areas devoid of enemy activity.

METOX – a decorative cross like device which attracts enemy aircraft.

MINE – a navigational device which rookie helmsmen home in on.

PERISCOPE – A devices used for viewing surface objects while the u-boat is submerged, invariably makes destroyers and frigates look like they are 2 miles away when in fact they are 300 meters away.

PRESSURE HULL – a thin metallic membrane that separates u-boat crews from certain death, often creaks and groans under the strain of pressure and is easily punctured by even the smallest caliber gunfire.

SILENT RUNNING – A condition aboard the boat in which one or more men invariably drop hammers or wrenches

SPREAD – a firing solution which results in four misses instead of the usual one.

TORPEDOES- Long tubular devices used for storing bad gyros and or faulty warheads / trigger mechanisms.

WAKE – A long trail of water disturbance that guides aircraft to u-boats.

WOLFPACK – a glorious attack against a convoy made by massive submarine formations that SH3 players are always late for or are unable to locate.

[grislyatoms]

Great stuff.

Fog- Atmospheric anomaly that causes U-boat watch personnel to go temporarily blind; simultaneously has the opposite effect on escort watch personnel.

Conning tower - the most conspicuous feature in a given area of ocean; analogous to "beacon".

UZO - a delicate, sensitive optical device used for dropping down hatchways

[Hanomag]

LMFAO

Your a sick man GR!!

[meduza]

:rotfl:

SO - a man whose duty is to inform you about ships in vicinity. He usually does this after they drop depthcharges on you.

SNORKEL - a device that sticks out of submerged u-boat, provides air and attracts airplanes

[Rhodes]

You forgot BERNARD!

[onelifecrisis]

Great stuff!!

[GoldenRivet]

Originally Posted by Rhodes

You forgot BERNARD!

BERNARD - See also * all of the above

[Kpt. Lehmann]

Holy jet-skis GR... that's some funny s**t!!!!

[SteveW1]

I like it, I like it a lot

This is one reason I love Subsim funny threads like this that make me smile or laugh after a hard day at work.

Steve

[Jimbuna]

MINE – a navigational device which rookie helmsmen home in on.

Classic

[nikbear]

"KEEL – the area beneath a ship under which magnetic trigger torpedoes can safely pass without causing any damage to anything."

Nail,Head interface right there :rotfl:
Thats bloody hilarious GR

[Rhodes]

Originally Posted by GoldenRivet

BERNARD - See also * all of the above

[GoldenRivet]

hoped you guys would enjoy it

[FIREWALL]

It helped me start my morning with a good laugh.

[Brag]

Rivet,

Excellent stuff, enjoyed the laughs