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Old 03-09-08, 10:31 AM   #1
Brag
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Who is Balz? Who is Balz?

Kipparikalle vbmenu_register("postmenu_799057", true);
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Now I need to know who the hell is Balz?

Now srsly, who he is? Everyone talks about him but I don't see any person named as him?

:|

J.S. Balz writes:

Who is Balz? Who is Balz?
How can anyone be ignorant of my stellar position as the greatesI Kaleun that ever lived?

How could any one be unaware of my masterful exploits against the relenless enemy of the Reich? My super cunning, splendid marksmanchip and my incredible tolerance of Bernard?

I ask you? How anyone lack awarness of my heroic deeds, my superb musical talents and the fantastic sound of my choir when they sing and twirl performing the hoochie woochie. I am the epitomy of what a Kriegsmarine officer should be. Simply a stellar example of the Teutonic Hero.

Lt. Kalb Writes:
Now, that I am in U-boat commanders school, it is a great relief to have nearly a thousand kilometers away from Balz. Phewwwww.

Brag writes:
Kaleuns! This is an opportunity to express your true feelings about Balz and enlighten our Kameraden who are new to Balz and Hoochie Woochie .

Let's hear your comments!
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Old 03-09-08, 12:25 PM   #2
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From 'Webster's unabridged'

BALZ, n, Swashbuckling, imaginative, egotistical, fictious hero of Silent Hunter 3 game. Conceived in the mind of adventurer-turned-writer. Dimunitive in stature, this eccentric U-boot kaleun-wanna-be (Balz not Brag) takes pleasure in torturing individuals with unrealistic and inappropriate demands on their time [his writings are long and arduous], eyes [he always goes around wearing 'tea cozies'], and eardrums [see definition for hoochie woochie]. Many believe him to be insane.

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Old 03-09-08, 12:36 PM   #3
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Well since you asked . . . I know I'm in the minority here but I really think Balz needs to stop treating this forum as if it were his personal blog. Ever hear of Livejournal or MySpace? Perhaps Subsim could benefit from an "after action reports" forum where Kaluen's like Balz can exercise their literary skills to their hearts content.
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Old 03-09-08, 01:26 PM   #4
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It doesn't bother me, but I have no doubt that posts like that would be moved elsewhere if done by someone else.

All forums have double standards though. Nothing new here.



Oh, and please visit my web page and give me money.
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Old 03-09-08, 02:10 PM   #5
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donno.. who's he ? :hmm:
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Old 03-09-08, 02:27 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Umfuld
It doesn't bother me, but I have no doubt that posts like that would be moved elsewhere if done by someone else.

All forums have double standards though. Nothing new here.



Oh, and please visit my web page and give me money.
Really? Who else would you have in mind? Brag's stuff is funny and hurts no-one. Double standards? Everybody seems to get some slack, until they cross some line, usually concerning decency. Even your thinly-veiled accusations aren't being moved.

Oh, and I agree: his constant plugging for his book is annoying.
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Old 03-09-08, 03:19 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Umfuld
It doesn't bother me, but I have no doubt that posts like that would be moved elsewhere if done by someone else.

All forums have double standards though. Nothing new here.



Oh, and please visit my web page and give me money.
So if it doesn't bother you why articulate it?

Its a frickin' website forum about a computer game based 60 years in the past.

Build a bridge and get over it
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Old 03-09-08, 03:32 PM   #8
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Sailor Steve:

Totally sour grapes on my part - and nothing that I'm really bent out of shape about but...

I posted something here once and asked that it not be moved because I only read the SH3 forums here at subsim. It wasn't SH3 related but was sub related. It wasn't spam and my only reason for posting was I thought some here might find it funny.

In the post I asked for it not to be moved, hoping that that would show that I understood that off topic posts are generally moved but that I was asking for a one time exception.

Of course it was moved right away.

It was pretty much the same thing as Balz. Just something about subs that I created hoping people would get a laugh from at the only forum at subsim I read.
There have been 4 Balz threads started in past couple of days - none of them have been moved. My single thread was moved even after I asked it not be.

That's a double standard, Steve. I realize I'm a relative nobody here but it's never fun to have that pointed out to you.



But regardless, Subsim is about the friendliest places I have ever come across on the net and I do sincerely apologize for being less than that.
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Old 03-09-08, 04:30 PM   #9
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Balz does to allied shipping what John Wilkes Booth did for American politics.
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Old 03-09-08, 05:14 PM   #10
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Kapt Balz has always been a favorite of mine. He can be a bit annoying at times, but to me he brings about a breath of fresh air when I've been below for a long time. True he has a huge ego but what Kaleun doesn't when he survives a great patrol. And Hey, if his crew wants to sing the Hoochie-Woochie, at least we don't have to hear it. In fact some of my best crewmen came from Balz' boat.......Guess they just couldn't sing and twirl at the same time. But they can sure load the torpedoes...........
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Old 03-09-08, 05:31 PM   #11
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Man... Remember that time when Balz sunk Great Britain ? Wow ! I don't know how he did it, but that was a happy time !
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Old 03-09-08, 08:30 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blacklight
Man... Remember that time when Balz sunk Great Britain ? Wow ! I don't know how he did it, but that was a happy time !
He didnt sink Great Britain... he surfaced off the white cliffs of Dover and, with his entire crew on the top deck they commenced choir practice until the entire island nation submerged in retreat from the dreadful sound. :rotfl:
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Old 03-09-08, 08:40 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Umfuld
Sailor Steve:

Totally sour grapes on my part - and nothing that I'm really bent out of shape about but...

I posted something here once and asked that it not be moved because I only read the SH3 forums here at subsim. It wasn't SH3 related but was sub related. It wasn't spam and my only reason for posting was I thought some here might find it funny.

In the post I asked for it not to be moved, hoping that that would show that I understood that off topic posts are generally moved but that I was asking for a one time exception.

Of course it was moved right away.

It was pretty much the same thing as Balz. Just something about subs that I created hoping people would get a laugh from at the only forum at subsim I read.
There have been 4 Balz threads started in past couple of days - none of them have been moved. My single thread was moved even after I asked it not be.

That's a double standard, Steve. I realize I'm a relative nobody here but it's never fun to have that pointed out to you.



But regardless, Subsim is about the friendliest places I have ever come across on the net and I do sincerely apologize for being less than that.
I'm sorry to hear that. What was it about? If it was totally off topic, as in something for General Topics, it probably just got moved to the appropriate place. I can't think of anywhere else that would be appropriate for Balz (except maybe the funny farm).

Contrary to percieved positions, I'm actually a nobody here too. I just have a big mouth.
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Old 03-09-08, 08:53 PM   #14
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Geez, what's with all the "Brag haters"?

He's understandably proud of being a published author and "advertises" his work in his sig the same as others "advertise" their mod sites and forums for work in which they also have taken great pride.

Go do something to be proud of and then maybe you'd understand instead of debasing your heart with childish quibbling.

As for Balz, I do recall he is indeed a Kaleun commanding a u-boat from Silent Hunter III which does make it relevant to post his adventures here the same as the many other u-boat stories that grace these threads. Other stories such as "The Laughing Swordfish" come to mind.

If all we were allowed to do is discuss the game itself and its historical comparisons, things would get dull very quickly.

But you same folks that are knocking on Brag would likely find reason to bitch about that as well.

Perhaps you're taking your in-game roles as soldiers in WWII Germany a bit too close to heart. Your whinging is its own type of fascism.

I will always welcome a bit of nuttiness and entertaining laughs interspersed among the cries for help from newbies and the hardcore debates about historical accuracy or game mechanics.

Keep posting, Brag!
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Old 03-09-08, 09:00 PM   #15
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It was a YTMND I made from Hunt For Red October. I since deleted it.

Here's an example of a YTMND: http://operationcovertclown.ytmnd.com


And yeah, it was moved to general topics. Pretty bad when you ask 'Could you not move my thread to a forum I don't read, please' and it's moved within an hour.

It's just, whatever. I should have taken the hint I guess.
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