Aroma by The Sea (BALZ)

[Brag]

Balz held his bag with tea cozies on his lap as the car pumped down the coastal road. In the back seat, squished between Zeiler Zteve and Werner Schnitzel, Bernard snored loudly.
"This is new," the driver said pointing at a sign with an arrow pointing to the right and saying CAR WASH.
Bernard woke up. "Goodie, goodie we can get the car washed." He tapped the driver on the shoulder, "Veer to starboard."
"You can wash the car tomorrow," Balz told Bernard. "We don't want to waste valuable drinking time,". Balz said too late to prevent the driver from following Bernard's order.

The driver slammed on the brakes before reaching the two lines of sailors who stood on the sides of the road with their peckers out, obviously enjoying the cool sea breeze.
"What are they doing?" asked Bernard-
"They are cooling their over excited willies, you patented seagoing moron." Balz rolled his window down and yelled, "We don't need no car wash today."

From behind a sand dune appeared Hajibaba Jimbuna. "We have special today, free gift of one magic carpet with every car wazh."
"Hmmm," thought Balz. "Bernard. you are a prime candidate for a wazh, can he go without a car?"
Hajibaba Jimbuna turned toward the willie cooling sailors. "Will you wazh an officer without a car?"
Botsman Kleister asked, "How much will you charge us for wazhing him?"
"Only four reichsmarks each. A once in a lifetime opportunity." He then addressed Balz. Right, Herr Kaleun?"
"Right, not only an officer but Bernard."
Zeiler Zteve got out of the car and drgged Bernard outside, then deftly jumped inside the car and locked the door..

An hour later.
Balz showed his Hitler tea cozy to Annette the chanteuse. "Do you think the fuehrer would like it if I wear it on his birthday?"
"Sure he would, but tell me, how did you get rid of Bernard tonight?"
Balz chuckled. "It was easy. The doorman would not let him in."