The “M” word. But don’t say it!

[Platapus]

I came across this article talking about (lowering voice) masturbation. SHH!!!!!

http://christwire.org/2011/01/4chan-...eenagers-to-m/

4Chan Uses Pornographic Images to Force Teenagers to “M”

The article skirts the issue of how can a website FORCE teenagers to.. well you know. While they won’t use the actual “M” word, the writers of this article use some interesting euphemisms

This online web ring has a evil plot to force your boy into wanting to touch his flesh sword with sexual intent.

/b/ is a universal term used by hackers to let them know a forum is filled with “bad” content. Since kids didn’t want their parents to know their were demon whacking in their rooms to produce devil DNA, they would make computer folders named /b/ to throw their parents off.

Epic: 
Epic is a elite word used by these masturbating monkey mashers to described a image that has the most porn scent to it. If you hear your child use this word, then you know to look through his internet browser’s history to see if he has been cruising on hell’s highway.

Oops, the editor missed that!

...exposing your child to devil temptations that are unnatural to do.

Allowing your child to perform self made sexual solo acts on himself will harden his soul and he will become Satan’s charcoal.

Satan’s charcoal?

A good way to keep you son from doing “M”, just let him know the spirits of his dead relatives are watching him as he is pounding himself in adult wet dreamland.

I have heard many a colorful term for Polishing the ole Bayonet, but these are quite inventive.

I think Masturbating Monkey Mashers is epic from an alliterative viewpoint.

If we were not meant to masturbate, how come our arms are just the right length?