Balz at Scapa Flow 1919

Brag · 04-24-09, 04:05 PM

Lieutenant Fritz Gwix writes:

Due to my extraordinary writing ability my glorious commander Kapitanleutenabt Johan Sebastian Balz has commissioned me to write his official biography and how he became Germany’s greatest and supreme hero.

While we wait for our boat to be fixed in dry-dock, I shall continue the amazing tale of the heroic commander Balz. A true amazing story that surpasses all amazement in the most amazing way. You will be amazed when you read it.

After the end of the Great War, the German Fleet was ordered to sail into the Firth of Forth. Balz, then a 13 year old cadet of amazing ability stood on the deck of the battle cruiser Bayern and said, “This is amazing, an undefeated fleet surrendering to the British. This could only happen in a place called The Firth of Forth. Why not in the Farth of Firth?” or the Fifth of Fahrt. I am getting a fit to fart.”

Hearing this amazing cadet’s comments, the British changed the destination of the undefeated German fleet to Scapa Flow and ordered the insurgent German sailors to take down the red communist flags.

“What is Scapa Flow?” Asked our amazing cadet Balz, “It sounds like water scaping and flowing from the toilet. No wonder Englanders seek colonies away from their Scapa Flows.

When the High Seas Fleet anchored in the desolate waters of this lake-like body of water, Admiral Ludwig von Reuter asked the amazing cadet Balz, “What should we do to restore our soiled honor?”

“We should drown the mutinous scum we have for sailors in the filthy waters scaping the flow . there will be no scaping them when the flow flows.

“You’re an amazing cadet,” the admiral said.
Balz nodded and clicked his heels. “I will distract the Englanders with my choir twirling and singing the hoochie-woochie. While I do that you can scuttle the fleet and drown the mutinous crews.”

“You are an amazing cadet,” the admiral said.
“Yes, Herr Admiral. I am an amazing cadet,” Balz said modestly.

Like you all know, the rest is history.

Laufen zum Ziel · 04-24-09, 04:50 PM

Now I have a clearer understanding of history. According to Balz of course.

HW3 · 04-24-09, 11:03 PM

Now we finally have the true story of how it happened.

headcase · 04-25-09, 12:22 AM

Are we sure Balz and Bernard aren't related?

sunvalleyslim · 04-26-09, 02:43 AM

Brag,
Glad to hear you back....if you were here sooner, then I was away longer........Cadet Balz was always bigger and grander than all other cadets.............

coronas · 04-26-09, 03:21 AM

It's good read Balz's adventures again, really He's an Amazing Cadet.

Jimbuna · 04-26-09, 06:55 AM

Welcome back Balz

papa_smurf · 04-26-09, 08:09 AM

Glad to have Balz back

. When are we going to get hold of his biography?

Task Force · 04-26-09, 09:49 AM

Welcome back brag/balz.

Brag · 04-27-09, 04:37 PM

Danke schohn, meine Herren

Jimbuna · 04-27-09, 05:15 PM

Is Balz still the king of the tea cozy?

Brag · 04-27-09, 06:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jimbuna

Is Balz still the king of the tea cozy?

Jawhol, mein Herr!

Of course, how the tea cozt came into play will be revealed at the propper time

04-24-09, 04:05 PM	#1
Brag Navy Seal Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Docked on a Russian pond Posts: 7,072 Downloads: 2 Uploads: 0	Balz at Scapa Flow 1919 Lieutenant Fritz Gwix writes: Due to my extraordinary writing ability my glorious commander Kapitanleutenabt Johan Sebastian Balz has commissioned me to write his official biography and how he became Germany’s greatest and supreme hero. While we wait for our boat to be fixed in dry-dock, I shall continue the amazing tale of the heroic commander Balz. A true amazing story that surpasses all amazement in the most amazing way. You will be amazed when you read it. After the end of the Great War, the German Fleet was ordered to sail into the Firth of Forth. Balz, then a 13 year old cadet of amazing ability stood on the deck of the battle cruiser Bayern and said, “This is amazing, an undefeated fleet surrendering to the British. This could only happen in a place called The Firth of Forth. Why not in the Farth of Firth?” or the Fifth of Fahrt. I am getting a fit to fart.” Hearing this amazing cadet’s comments, the British changed the destination of the undefeated German fleet to Scapa Flow and ordered the insurgent German sailors to take down the red communist flags. “What is Scapa Flow?” Asked our amazing cadet Balz, “It sounds like water scaping and flowing from the toilet. No wonder Englanders seek colonies away from their Scapa Flows. When the High Seas Fleet anchored in the desolate waters of this lake-like body of water, Admiral Ludwig von Reuter asked the amazing cadet Balz, “What should we do to restore our soiled honor?” “We should drown the mutinous scum we have for sailors in the filthy waters scaping the flow . there will be no scaping them when the flow flows. “You’re an amazing cadet,” the admiral said. Balz nodded and clicked his heels. “I will distract the Englanders with my choir twirling and singing the hoochie-woochie. While I do that you can scuttle the fleet and drown the mutinous crews.” “You are an amazing cadet,” the admiral said. “Yes, Herr Admiral. I am an amazing cadet,” Balz said modestly. Like you all know, the rest is history. __________________ Espionage, adventure, suspense, are just a click away Click here to look inside Brag's book: Amazon.com: Kingmaker: Alexey Braguine: Books Order Kingmaker here: http://www.subsim.com/store.html For Tactics visit:http://www.freewebs.com/kielman/

04-24-09, 04:50 PM	#2
Laufen zum Ziel Eternal Patrol Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Hiding on the bottom Posts: 1,783 Downloads: 853 Uploads: 457	Now I have a clearer understanding of history. According to Balz of course. __________________ RIP Laufen zum Ziel

04-24-09, 11:03 PM	#3
HW3 Navy Seal Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Gresham Oregon Posts: 6,574 Downloads: 458 Uploads: 0	Now we finally have the true story of how it happened. __________________ "Some ships are designed to sink...others require our assistance." Nathan Zelk

04-25-09, 12:22 AM	#4
headcase Sparky Join Date: May 2007 Location: The wrong side of the tracks, Neverland Posts: 157 Downloads: 9 Uploads: 0	Are we sure Balz and Bernard aren't related? __________________ It's like the Blues. You can't play em if you haven't lived em. GWX 3.0 DID

04-26-09, 02:43 AM	#5
sunvalleyslim Ace of the Deep Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Los Angeles, Ca Posts: 1,142 Downloads: 267 Uploads: 0	Brag, Glad to hear you back....if you were here sooner, then I was away longer........Cadet Balz was always bigger and grander than all other cadets............. __________________ Crew member/ decommission member TM2(SS)(SD) 3/68-7/70 DIESEL BOATS FOREVER USS SEGUNDO (SS398)

04-26-09, 03:21 AM	#6
coronas Ace of the Deep Join Date: May 2005 Location: Asturias, España Posts: 1,168 Downloads: 39 Uploads: 0	It's good read Balz's adventures again, really He's an Amazing Cadet. __________________

04-26-09, 06:55 AM	#7
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 190,481 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Welcome back Balz __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!

04-26-09, 08:09 AM	#8
papa_smurf Ocean Warrior Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: High Peak, Derbyshire Posts: 2,851 Downloads: 33 Uploads: 0	Glad to have Balz back. When are we going to get hold of his biography? __________________

04-26-09, 09:49 AM	#9
Task Force Rear Admiral Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: SPACE!!!! Posts: 10,142 Downloads: 85 Uploads: 0	Welcome back brag/balz. __________________ Task Force industries "Taking control of the world, one mind at a time"

04-27-09, 04:37 PM	#10
Brag Navy Seal Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Docked on a Russian pond Posts: 7,072 Downloads: 2 Uploads: 0	Danke schohn, meine Herren __________________ Espionage, adventure, suspense, are just a click away Click here to look inside Brag's book: Amazon.com: Kingmaker: Alexey Braguine: Books Order Kingmaker here: http://www.subsim.com/store.html For Tactics visit:http://www.freewebs.com/kielman/

04-27-09, 05:15 PM	#11
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 190,481 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Is Balz still the king of the tea cozy? __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!