Speechless (Balz)

Brag · 01-22-08, 01:31 PM

Kptlt. J.S. Balz writes:

Lorient 04 November 1940

Dear Mutti,

My pleasant summer in Brittany is finished. Time for taking my brand new U-124 into the fight against the malignant Mr. Churchill and his minions. I am sailing tomorrow and the people in the Vaterland can sleep in peace knowing that the Great Balz is out there driving the British Empire to its grave.

I like this new, larger boat. It has better acoustics than a type VII and I can have a larger choir.

For the main part, I had a good summer, except for the bloody speeches. That fool Churchill: What is it with him? Fighting on the beaches, pfuy! Doesn't he know that beaches are for relaxation? For watching sunsets and cooking wurst on a bonfire?

Then, we have Roosevelt. What's this Arsenal for Democracy? Why not Manchester United for Democracy? I ask, why, why.

To make things worse, that Frenchman De Gaul started making speeches too! Thus taking more of my time.

Thanks very much for the lead foil lined tea cozy. When I wear it, the voices stop. Including those of the Martians.

Your wonderful son,
Kptlt. Johan Sebastian Balz.

NealT · 01-22-08, 02:54 PM

I thought it was too good to be true...

Happy Hunting!

Avatar · 01-22-08, 03:23 PM

I need one of those lead tea cozys myself.

Fenris_Wolf · 01-22-08, 04:29 PM

I think Balz would look formidable wearing that tea cozy with the swastika and all if only he was a secret agent guarding a top secret research lab against invading female aliens and zombies.

I trust he would kick some serious ass and make the motherland proud!

Seriously, congratz on the new IXB boat (I assume).

My GWX2 download is (FINALLY!) almost finished and soon I'll be doing the hoochie woochie in my favorite sea, the mediterranean!

bookworm_020 · 01-22-08, 05:55 PM

Send him for a patrol in the Channel! That will change the tune of his music!

Brag · 01-23-08, 12:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fenris_Wolf

I think Balz would look formidable wearing that tea cozy with the swastika and all if only he was a secret agent guarding a top secret research lab against invading female aliens and zombies.

I trust he would kick some serious ass and make the motherland proud!

Seriously, congratz on the new IXB boat (I assume).

My GWX2 download is (FINALLY!) almost finished and soon I'll be doing the hoochie woochie in my favorite sea, the mediterranean!

Good luck in the Med. Keep the maracas quiet when being hunted :rotfl: :rotfl:

Tango589 · 01-23-08, 01:43 PM

Has anyone considered making a film of Balz's expliots? A possible title could be "Das Hoochie Woochie".

Brag · 01-23-08, 08:00 PM

Not too long ago, someone made a video with Balz in its credits

01-22-08, 01:31 PM	#1
Brag Navy Seal Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Docked on a Russian pond Posts: 7,072 Downloads: 2 Uploads: 0	Speechless (Balz) Kptlt. J.S. Balz writes: Lorient 04 November 1940 Dear Mutti, My pleasant summer in Brittany is finished. Time for taking my brand new U-124 into the fight against the malignant Mr. Churchill and his minions. I am sailing tomorrow and the people in the Vaterland can sleep in peace knowing that the Great Balz is out there driving the British Empire to its grave. I like this new, larger boat. It has better acoustics than a type VII and I can have a larger choir. For the main part, I had a good summer, except for the bloody speeches. That fool Churchill: What is it with him? Fighting on the beaches, pfuy! Doesn't he know that beaches are for relaxation? For watching sunsets and cooking wurst on a bonfire? Then, we have Roosevelt. What's this Arsenal for Democracy? Why not Manchester United for Democracy? I ask, why, why. To make things worse, that Frenchman De Gaul started making speeches too! Thus taking more of my time. Thanks very much for the lead foil lined tea cozy. When I wear it, the voices stop. Including those of the Martians. Your wonderful son, Kptlt. Johan Sebastian Balz. __________________ Espionage, adventure, suspense, are just a click away Click here to look inside Brag's book: Amazon.com: Kingmaker: Alexey Braguine: Books Order Kingmaker here: http://www.subsim.com/store.html For Tactics visit:http://www.freewebs.com/kielman/

01-22-08, 04:29 PM	#4
Fenris_Wolf Sparky Join Date: Jul 2007 Posts: 155 Downloads: 10 Uploads: 0	I think Balz would look formidable wearing that tea cozy with the swastika and all if only he was a secret agent guarding a top secret research lab against invading female aliens and zombies. I trust he would kick some serious ass and make the motherland proud! Seriously, congratz on the new IXB boat (I assume). My GWX2 download is (FINALLY!) almost finished and soon I'll be doing the hoochie woochie in my favorite sea, the mediterranean! __________________ NO HOOCHIE WOOCHIE - NO LIFE!

01-22-08, 05:55 PM	#5
bookworm_020 Navy Seal Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Sinking ships off the Australian coast Posts: 5,966 Downloads: 1 Uploads: 0	Send him for a patrol in the Channel! That will change the tune of his music! __________________ "There is always one person in any organization who knows whats going on, That person must be fired"

01-23-08, 01:43 PM	#7
Tango589 Still crazy as ever! Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: A little south of sanity Posts: 3,375 Downloads: 180 Uploads: 1	Has anyone considered making a film of Balz's expliots? A possible title could be "Das Hoochie Woochie". __________________ Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way...

01-23-08, 08:00 PM	#8
Brag Navy Seal Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Docked on a Russian pond Posts: 7,072 Downloads: 2 Uploads: 0	Not too long ago, someone made a video with Balz in its credits __________________ Espionage, adventure, suspense, are just a click away Click here to look inside Brag's book: Amazon.com: Kingmaker: Alexey Braguine: Books Order Kingmaker here: http://www.subsim.com/store.html For Tactics visit:http://www.freewebs.com/kielman/

01-22-08, 02:54 PM	#2
NealT Ace of the Deep Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: 2 Meters Below Jimbuna Posts: 1,060 Downloads: 4 Uploads: 0	I thought it was too good to be true... Happy Hunting!

01-22-08, 03:23 PM	#3
Avatar Commodore Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Way out there Posts: 603 Downloads: 24 Uploads: 0	I need one of those lead tea cozys myself.