BDSB (Balz Discovers Sneaky Bastards)

Brag · 07-29-07, 09:02 AM

18 February 1920
U-53 in Cadiz.
Yeah! Despite BDU's foolishness and that stupid bastard Brag who now works at BDU cleaning ashtrays, I did get to Cadiz. And yeah, you dumbkopfs, I made it with good tonnage--129,044 BRT to be precise.

No need to describe my patrol and the trail of sunken ships left on my glorious wake. What is interesting, is how with my brilliant perspicacity I discovered what the nefarious Tommies are doing in the Gulf of Cadiz.

Shortly after clearing Cape Sao Vicente, the weather moderated and we used the deck gun on a few small merchies. But I wanted something big before entering port.

My crew is composed of absolute dingalings and the hydrophone operators need to see a hearing specialist. Approaching Cadiz at night from the NW, we get a sound contact.
Up scope!
A big mother of a British freighter is almost on top of us.
Surface!
Blam, blam, blam. Down she goes in sight of the Cadiz lighthouses.
Below, I check the chart.
Blam, blam, blam. The gun crew is firing again!
The bastards are gonna get me in trouble. All I need is the Spanish Navy to come after me.
Cease fire!
The mast with the flag of the little ship leaving Cadiz is gone--Oh well. Finish the job, let's find out who it is after it's sunk.
Phew, it turned out to be another Brit.
What the bastards are doing leaving Gibraltar is travel in an arch at the edge of the shallow water at slow speed and our sound people are no picking them up. When I leave Cadiz I'm going to show them a trick or two.

We came alongside the Thalia at 0200 hrs. I had to bang the hull with a spanner to wake up the lazy bastards and get a proper reception.

Posing as a Sweish sailor, this evening, I'm enjoying the sunset, eating fried sardines and drinking wine. You guys in Willi, Kiel and on patrol eat your hearts out.

Oh, BTW, Got a Knight's Cross by parcel post. Not bad for a second patrol, eh?

Once again, happy birthday Jimbuna.

Oblt. z.S. Johan Sebastian Balz

papa_smurf · 07-29-07, 10:02 AM

Hmm..... what DID you say to BDu to get that patrol?!?!?

Seems that you did okay, and survived due to exellent command skills, shame that can't be said about your crew............

On the subject of rubbish patrols, once got sent to patrol between Scapa flow and Lerwick! - got sunk, nuff said.

Brag · 07-29-07, 10:27 AM

I first Balzed 100K tons, then headed south. BDU doesn't dare Sensure top tonners like me

. Besides I keep track of things, a little whisper to Gestapo can go a long way, too.

That's how Brag ended up cleaning ashtrays at BDU. :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: Beats digging graves in a penal battalion.

Brag · 07-29-07, 04:45 PM

20 March 1940

Left Cadiz and started Balzing Tommies trying to sneak along the coast. It's a duck-shoot.

sunvalleyslim · 07-29-07, 06:05 PM

Good Luck U-53,
Don't leave Herr Balz on the deck when you finish with Cadiz. He's liable to fall overboard due to the consumption of vast pints of wine...............

07-29-07, 09:02 AM	#1
Brag Navy Seal Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Docked on a Russian pond Posts: 7,072 Downloads: 2 Uploads: 0	BDSB (Balz Discovers Sneaky Bastards) 18 February 1920 U-53 in Cadiz. Yeah! Despite BDU's foolishness and that stupid bastard Brag who now works at BDU cleaning ashtrays, I did get to Cadiz. And yeah, you dumbkopfs, I made it with good tonnage--129,044 BRT to be precise. No need to describe my patrol and the trail of sunken ships left on my glorious wake. What is interesting, is how with my brilliant perspicacity I discovered what the nefarious Tommies are doing in the Gulf of Cadiz. Shortly after clearing Cape Sao Vicente, the weather moderated and we used the deck gun on a few small merchies. But I wanted something big before entering port. My crew is composed of absolute dingalings and the hydrophone operators need to see a hearing specialist. Approaching Cadiz at night from the NW, we get a sound contact. Up scope! A big mother of a British freighter is almost on top of us. Surface! Blam, blam, blam. Down she goes in sight of the Cadiz lighthouses. Below, I check the chart. Blam, blam, blam. The gun crew is firing again! The bastards are gonna get me in trouble. All I need is the Spanish Navy to come after me. Cease fire! The mast with the flag of the little ship leaving Cadiz is gone--Oh well. Finish the job, let's find out who it is after it's sunk. Phew, it turned out to be another Brit. What the bastards are doing leaving Gibraltar is travel in an arch at the edge of the shallow water at slow speed and our sound people are no picking them up. When I leave Cadiz I'm going to show them a trick or two. We came alongside the Thalia at 0200 hrs. I had to bang the hull with a spanner to wake up the lazy bastards and get a proper reception. Posing as a Sweish sailor, this evening, I'm enjoying the sunset, eating fried sardines and drinking wine. You guys in Willi, Kiel and on patrol eat your hearts out. Oh, BTW, Got a Knight's Cross by parcel post. Not bad for a second patrol, eh? Once again, happy birthday Jimbuna. Oblt. z.S. Johan Sebastian Balz __________________ Espionage, adventure, suspense, are just a click away Click here to look inside Brag's book: Amazon.com: Kingmaker: Alexey Braguine: Books Order Kingmaker here: http://www.subsim.com/store.html For Tactics visit:http://www.freewebs.com/kielman/

07-29-07, 10:27 AM	#3
Brag Navy Seal Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Docked on a Russian pond Posts: 7,072 Downloads: 2 Uploads: 0	I first Balzed 100K tons, then headed south. BDU doesn't dare Sensure top tonners like me . Besides I keep track of things, a little whisper to Gestapo can go a long way, too. That's how Brag ended up cleaning ashtrays at BDU. :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: Beats digging graves in a penal battalion. __________________ Espionage, adventure, suspense, are just a click away Click here to look inside Brag's book: Amazon.com: Kingmaker: Alexey Braguine: Books Order Kingmaker here: http://www.subsim.com/store.html For Tactics visit:http://www.freewebs.com/kielman/

07-29-07, 04:45 PM	#4
Brag Navy Seal Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Docked on a Russian pond Posts: 7,072 Downloads: 2 Uploads: 0	20 March 1940 Left Cadiz and started Balzing Tommies trying to sneak along the coast. It's a duck-shoot. __________________ Espionage, adventure, suspense, are just a click away Click here to look inside Brag's book: Amazon.com: Kingmaker: Alexey Braguine: Books Order Kingmaker here: http://www.subsim.com/store.html For Tactics visit:http://www.freewebs.com/kielman/

07-29-07, 06:05 PM	#5
sunvalleyslim Ace of the Deep Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Los Angeles, Ca Posts: 1,142 Downloads: 267 Uploads: 0	Good Luck U-53, Don't leave Herr Balz on the deck when you finish with Cadiz. He's liable to fall overboard due to the consumption of vast pints of wine............... __________________ Crew member/ decommission member TM2(SS)(SD) 3/68-7/70 DIESEL BOATS FOREVER USS SEGUNDO (SS398)

07-29-07, 10:02 AM	#2
papa_smurf Ocean Warrior Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: High Peak, Derbyshire Posts: 2,851 Downloads: 33 Uploads: 0	Hmm..... what DID you say to BDu to get that patrol?!?!? Seems that you did okay, and survived due to exellent command skills, shame that can't be said about your crew............ On the subject of rubbish patrols, once got sent to patrol between Scapa flow and Lerwick! - got sunk, nuff said.