Why a Zombie U-Boat Crew Would Be Ideal

SubConscious · 08-07-11, 09:25 PM

I just started watching AMC's "The Walking Dead". This got me thinking that a zombie U-boat crew would be ideal. Here's why:

No need for provisions
Patrols would only be limited by fuel
No fatigue – no need to rotate stations
Greater ability to man flak guns despite receiving wounds
No worries if a crew member washes overboard
No more worries about abandoning merchant seamen after their ship has been sunk, as they would be eaten
The crew is always dead quiet
No one minds the diesel smell as much
The ability to flood the internal compartments would significantly increase the maximum dive depth
No more manual calculations for torpedoes: All firing solutions would be done by dead reckoning
?

Willem VonBoom · 08-07-11, 09:50 PM

Quote:

No more worries about abandoning merchant seamen after their ship has been sunk, as they would be eaten

This *is* reprovisioning!

Fish In The Water · 08-07-11, 09:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SubConscious

This got me thinking that a zombie U-boat crew would be ideal. Here's why:

No need to worry about clean laundry as everybody smells bad anyway...

frau kaleun · 08-07-11, 11:13 PM

11 April 1940 06:32
From: BdU
To: U-36
Report position and weather.

11 April 1940 06:58
From: U-36
To: BdU
BRAAAAIINS!!!

9 May 1940 09:45
From: BdU
To: U-36
Report position and weather.

9 May 1940 10:26
From: U-36
To: BdU
BRAAAAIINS!!!

23 June 1940 21:12
From: BdU
To: U-36
Convoy reported heading WNW 5 knots AM54 by U-42. Contact lost in heavy weather. Report any sightings immediately.

24 June 1940 04:32
From: U-36
To: BdU
Convoy sighted heading WNW 5 knots AM55. Maintaining contact at approx 10 km distance. Limited visibility. Will await further orders. P.S. BRAAAAIINS!!!

Lord_magerius · 08-07-11, 11:32 PM

Good idea but I'm not sure I'd like a zombie Bernard on my boat, he's uncoordinated as it is

sublynx · 08-08-11, 02:10 AM

Other positive aspects of zombie crewmen:

* if they get sunk, who cares, they were dead and buried years ago - there'll be no mourning for the fallen and therefore no noticeable moral drop on the relatives of the zombies
* if they are forced to surface and then taken as POW's, the enemy has to be extra careful about prison camp arrangements - if not, there might be a zombie contagion in enemy areas. Churchill, Roosevelt and Stalin might get bitten by a runaway zombie, leading to major malfunctions in the strategic decision making capabilities of the allied leaders

SubConscious · 08-08-11, 10:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by frau kaleun

11 April 1940 06:32
From: BdU
To: U-36
Report position and weather.

11 April 1940 06:58
From: U-36
To: BdU
BRAAAAIINS!!!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

08-07-11, 09:25 PM	#1
SubConscious Frogman Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Pennsylvania Posts: 309 Downloads: 102 Uploads: 0	Why a Zombie U-Boat Crew Would Be Ideal I just started watching AMC's "The Walking Dead". This got me thinking that a zombie U-boat crew would be ideal. Here's why: No need for provisions Patrols would only be limited by fuel No fatigue – no need to rotate stations Greater ability to man flak guns despite receiving wounds No worries if a crew member washes overboard No more worries about abandoning merchant seamen after their ship has been sunk, as they would be eaten The crew is always dead quiet No one minds the diesel smell as much The ability to flood the internal compartments would significantly increase the maximum dive depth No more manual calculations for torpedoes: All firing solutions would be done by dead reckoning ? __________________ "Come into port greatly, or sail with God the seas..." - Emerson

08-07-11, 11:32 PM	#5
Lord_magerius Seasoned Skipper Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: Right by the hydrophone station Posts: 724 Downloads: 96 Uploads: 0	Good idea but I'm not sure I'd like a zombie Bernard on my boat, he's uncoordinated as it is __________________

08-08-11, 02:10 AM	#6
sublynx Sea Lord Join Date: Mar 2011 Location: In the conning tower of my VIIC scanning the sea through the periscope Posts: 1,698 Downloads: 173 Uploads: 7	Other positive aspects of zombie crewmen: * if they get sunk, who cares, they were dead and buried years ago - there'll be no mourning for the fallen and therefore no noticeable moral drop on the relatives of the zombies * if they are forced to surface and then taken as POW's, the enemy has to be extra careful about prison camp arrangements - if not, there might be a zombie contagion in enemy areas. Churchill, Roosevelt and Stalin might get bitten by a runaway zombie, leading to major malfunctions in the strategic decision making capabilities of the allied leaders __________________ [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] NYGM+H.sie v16+Stiebler 4C+MaGui WS

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08-07-11, 11:13 PM	#4
frau kaleun Rear Admiral Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Skyri--oh who are we kidding, I'm probably at Lowe's. Again. Posts: 12,706 Downloads: 168 Uploads: 0	11 April 1940 06:32 From: BdU To: U-36 Report position and weather. 11 April 1940 06:58 From: U-36 To: BdU BRAAAAIINS!!! 9 May 1940 09:45 From: BdU To: U-36 Report position and weather. 9 May 1940 10:26 From: U-36 To: BdU BRAAAAIINS!!! 23 June 1940 21:12 From: BdU To: U-36 Convoy reported heading WNW 5 knots AM54 by U-42. Contact lost in heavy weather. Report any sightings immediately. 24 June 1940 04:32 From: U-36 To: BdU Convoy sighted heading WNW 5 knots AM55. Maintaining contact at approx 10 km distance. Limited visibility. Will await further orders. P.S. BRAAAAIINS!!!