This is the comment thread! - Page 409

Eichhörnchen · 02-28-15, 07:51 AM

Isn't this the stoopidest ventriloquist's dummy you ever saw?

"That's ngot a kind hing to say..."

Jimbuna · 02-28-15, 08:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eichhornchen

"Gollocks!"

Precisely, threads merged.

Oberon · 02-28-15, 09:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sailor Steve

I think the point being missed here is that the British Empire disappeared long ago, and since The Sun never sets on the British Empire, said Empire obviously took The Sun with it. Wherever the British Empire, and The Sun, may be now, it's definitely not anywhere near Britain. In fact they complain about never seeing The Sun, so complaints about them hogging it are sorely misplaced.

I saw The Sun this afternoon, on the newspaper stand.

I don't see what all the fuss is about to be honest.

Eichhörnchen · 03-01-15, 04:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tango589

I've just found out the correct pronunsciation of 'Eichhornchen'. Up until now, I've lazily been pronouncing it as 'Ikehornen'. Who am I kidding, I'll still pronounce it like that coz it's easier!

Now all you need to do is find out how to spell the word "pronunciation"

Tango589 · 03-01-15, 05:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eichhornchen

Now all you need to do is find out how to spell the word "pronunciation"

Damn tryping errorts.

Aktungbby · 03-01-15, 01:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jimbuna

I'm wondering if I'll ever get the two minutes of life back I wasted readontg the previous two pages.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Harvs

If a man states an opinion and there is no woman to hear it, is he still wrong?

!tserof eht ni daeh sih no sllaf eert a fi ylnO...

Eichhörnchen · 03-03-15, 08:47 AM

I'm regularly amused by the buzzwords and slogans invented by politicians. Listening to the BBC News just now, I heard a government minister say that a "whistle-blowing portal" would be set up.

Haven't I already got one of those?

Jimbuna · 03-03-15, 02:42 PM

Carrots may be good for a human's eyesight, but they are excellent for a snowman's sense of smell.

Eichhörnchen · 03-05-15, 10:07 AM

NOT FUNNY?

There's obviously a circus coming to our town 'cos I keep seeing their vans with a big clown's face all over them. Well I never found circus clowns funny, not even as a kid. Continually falling on your backside and chucking buckets of confetti over the audience just doesn't do it for me.

My wife and I sometimes imagine TV sketches we'd like to see, but which haven't been done yet, and my ideal clown sketch might show:

Clown standing between two large crates about twenty feet apart. Dwarf pops out from one, runs up behind clown and kicks him in the jacksy. There follows the usual gormless hopping about, rubbing of sore backside: so far so ordinary. Clown turns round but of course the dwarf is back in his box by now. Dozy clown scratches his stupid head. Kids in crowd go mental.

Out from the other crate pops another dwarf; runs up, kicks clown in the jacksy. Clown, rubbing backside, faces audience who are yelling "He's behind you..." Clown turns round: no-one there.

Meanwhile, dwarf 1 pops out of his box again, runs up, kick clown up the bum, clown with wretched imploring face still not able to turn round in time to catch sight of the dwarf who's vanished back into his crate.

Dwarf 2 pops out again, this time kids in audience screaming and pointing "There! There!" Clown turns round as dwarf is beginning his run-up; Clown with big vacant smile on face just before dwarf arrives in target zone and kicks him FULL IN THE CROTCH.

Now I'd pay to see that...

Eichhörnchen · 03-12-15, 11:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tango589

Yes, but that would lead to some appalling sights, because you very rarely get attractive ladies as ghosts. Mind you, if you did, I would be okay with being haunted!

I just read this: you need to see someone...

Eichhörnchen · 03-18-15, 10:58 AM

Did you ever see such a beautiful face? The thing that is so poignant to me is that this lovely gaze can no longer be seen in the world, except in old photographs. She'd be 132 years old now...

I had a random thought one day while walking through Spalding with my wife and it came back to me today while I was looking at pictures of some of these bygone lovelies. I was still quite young, and as we passed a club (with music and the sound of folk having a good time coming from within) I pointed and said "I could have any woman in the place..." She looked over at the sign by the door. It said: "Afternoon Tea Dance"

Aktungbby · 03-18-15, 11:14 AM

IMHO: It's not possible to have random thoughts whilst gazing at bygone lovelies!

They're still makin' movies about this one! after 3,330 years! Helen of Troy!

even after ten years of misery, her Hubby took her back! the movie got that part wrong!

Tango589 · 03-18-15, 01:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aktungbby

IMHO: It's not possible to have random thoughts whilst gazing at any lovelies!

True, my thoughts tend to be very specific!

Jimbuna · 03-19-15, 07:17 AM

Is doing a handstand holding the entire world in your hands?

STEED · 03-19-15, 09:22 AM

If life is so damn good why dose the human race like misery more.

02-28-15, 07:51 AM	#6121
Eichhörnchen Starte das Auto Join Date: Aug 2014 Location: The Fens Posts: 17,472 Downloads: 5 Uploads: 0	I was thinking: Isn't this the stoopidest ventriloquist's dummy you ever saw? "That's ngot a kind hing to say..."

03-03-15, 08:47 AM	#6127
Eichhörnchen Starte das Auto Join Date: Aug 2014 Location: The Fens Posts: 17,472 Downloads: 5 Uploads: 0	Comment: I'm regularly amused by the buzzwords and slogans invented by politicians. Listening to the BBC News just now, I heard a government minister say that a "whistle-blowing portal" would be set up. Haven't I already got one of those?

03-03-15, 02:42 PM	#6128
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 190,992 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Carrots may be good for a human's eyesight, but they are excellent for a snowman's sense of smell. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!

03-05-15, 10:07 AM	#6129
Eichhörnchen Starte das Auto Join Date: Aug 2014 Location: The Fens Posts: 17,472 Downloads: 5 Uploads: 0	Random Thought plus Comment: NOT FUNNY? There's obviously a circus coming to our town 'cos I keep seeing their vans with a big clown's face all over them. Well I never found circus clowns funny, not even as a kid. Continually falling on your backside and chucking buckets of confetti over the audience just doesn't do it for me. My wife and I sometimes imagine TV sketches we'd like to see, but which haven't been done yet, and my ideal clown sketch might show: Clown standing between two large crates about twenty feet apart. Dwarf pops out from one, runs up behind clown and kicks him in the jacksy. There follows the usual gormless hopping about, rubbing of sore backside: so far so ordinary. Clown turns round but of course the dwarf is back in his box by now. Dozy clown scratches his stupid head. Kids in crowd go mental. Out from the other crate pops another dwarf; runs up, kicks clown in the jacksy. Clown, rubbing backside, faces audience who are yelling "He's behind you..." Clown turns round: no-one there. Meanwhile, dwarf 1 pops out of his box again, runs up, kick clown up the bum, clown with wretched imploring face still not able to turn round in time to catch sight of the dwarf who's vanished back into his crate. Dwarf 2 pops out again, this time kids in audience screaming and pointing "There! There!" Clown turns round as dwarf is beginning his run-up; Clown with big vacant smile on face just before dwarf arrives in target zone and kicks him FULL IN THE CROTCH. Now I'd pay to see that...

03-18-15, 10:58 AM	#6131
Eichhörnchen Starte das Auto Join Date: Aug 2014 Location: The Fens Posts: 17,472 Downloads: 5 Uploads: 0	Random Thought of the Day Did you ever see such a beautiful face? The thing that is so poignant to me is that this lovely gaze can no longer be seen in the world, except in old photographs. She'd be 132 years old now... I had a random thought one day while walking through Spalding with my wife and it came back to me today while I was looking at pictures of some of these bygone lovelies. I was still quite young, and as we passed a club (with music and the sound of folk having a good time coming from within) I pointed and said "I could have any woman in the place..." She looked over at the sign by the door. It said: "Afternoon Tea Dance" __________________

03-18-15, 11:14 AM	#6132
Aktungbby Gefallen Engel U-666 Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: On a tilted, overheated, overpopulated spinning mudball on Collision course with Andromeda Galaxy Posts: 30,080 Downloads: 24 Uploads: 0	IMHO: It's not possible to have random thoughts whilst gazing at bygone lovelies! They're still makin' movies about this one! after 3,330 years! Helen of Troy! even after ten years of misery, her Hubby took her back! the movie got that part wrong! __________________ "Only two things are infinite; The Universe and human squirrelyness?!!

03-19-15, 07:17 AM	#6134
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 190,992 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Is doing a handstand holding the entire world in your hands? __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!

03-19-15, 09:22 AM	#6135
STEED Lucky Jack Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Down Town UK Posts: 27,695 Downloads: 89 Uploads: 48	If life is so damn good why dose the human race like misery more. __________________ Dr Who rest in peace 1963-2017. To borrow Davros saying...I NAME YOU CHIBNALL THE DESTROYER OF DR WHO YOU KILLED IT!