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Old 06-08-22, 12:52 PM   #10186
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I consider myself a crayon, I might not be your favorite color but one day you'll need me to complete your picture.
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Old 06-09-22, 08:38 AM   #10187
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Christmas is a competition between who gives up first: Your feet or your wallet.
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Old 06-13-22, 12:22 PM   #10188
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Marriage is the bond between a person who never remembers anniversaries and another who never forgets them.
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Old 06-15-22, 12:27 PM   #10189
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It's not important to win, it's important to make the other guy lose.
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Old 06-16-22, 10:15 AM   #10190
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Never test how deep the water is with both feet.
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Old 06-18-22, 01:19 PM   #10191
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A best friend is like a four leaf clover, hard to find, lucky to have.
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Old 06-19-22, 12:28 PM   #10192
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A clear conscience is the sure sign of a bad memory.
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Old 06-20-22, 01:10 PM   #10193
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I'm old enough to know better, but young enough to do it anyway.
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Old 06-21-22, 05:44 AM   #10194
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Some people walk into our lives and leave footprints on our hearts. Others walk into our lives and we want to leave footprints on their face!
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Old 06-22-22, 05:50 AM   #10195
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My friend donates a kidney to the City Hospital, and he's treated like some hero.
I donate five kidneys to the hospital and I get arrested.
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Old 06-22-22, 09:57 AM   #10196
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If you didn't see it with your own eyes, or hear it with your own ears, don't invent it with your small mind and share it with your big mouth!
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Old 06-23-22, 10:43 AM   #10197
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After a while, I eventually fell in love and there was nobody to pick me up.
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Old 06-24-22, 03:48 AM   #10198
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Chocolatiers - what's that all about then? This was never suggested as a career option at school - I think I could've done that. Moira reckons all you need is a sense of taste and be able to see (the last one a real bonus I suppose) and then a life of mincing up and down in Switzerland wearing a chef's hat and carrying a big wooden spoon
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Old 06-25-22, 08:42 AM   #10199
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I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me, the table and chairs are bullies, and the walls get in my way.
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Old 06-27-22, 07:36 AM   #10200
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You know your driving is really terrible when your GPS says 'After 300 feet, stop and let me out!'
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