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04-23-23, 04:58 AM | #4246 |
Chief of the Boat
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Yo mama is so ugly that even dogs refuse to lick her face.
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Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
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04-23-23, 05:00 AM | #4247 |
Chief of the Boat
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I first discovered I was dyslexic when I went to an Abba themed party dressed like an Arab.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-24-23, 05:31 AM | #4248 |
Chief of the Boat
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Had a one night stand last year that went horribly wrong, we’re now married.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-24-23, 05:36 AM | #4249 |
Chief of the Boat
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Yesterday my boss told me “Don’t dress for the job you have, dress for the job you want”. Today when I turned up at the office dressed like a Ghostbuster he told me I was fired.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-24-23, 05:37 AM | #4250 |
Fleet Admiral
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Me: Look at that marbling. That's what would make a great steak!
Everyone else at the autopsy:
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abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right. |
04-24-23, 05:51 AM | #4251 |
Fleet Admiral
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My Wife: Do you remember the dumbest thing you ever said to me?
Me: I do
__________________
abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right. |
04-24-23, 05:59 AM | #4252 |
Chief of the Boat
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Once you get past a certain age “getting lucky” is the thing that happens when your remember where you put down your keys.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-25-23, 05:36 AM | #4253 |
Chief of the Boat
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Yo mama is so ugly she can’t even attract mosquitos!
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-25-23, 06:06 AM | #4254 |
Chief of the Boat
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People are really strange. When you scream in a library they tell you to shut up but when you do it on an airplane everyone joins in.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-25-23, 11:25 PM | #4255 |
Sea Lord
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Reno Nevada USA
Posts: 1,860
Downloads: 85
Uploads: 0
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Five guys who play poker are in their regular Friday game when Bill thinks he has a hand that he can't lose, goes all in but finds out he just lost $1,000. He is so shocked that he has a heart attack and dies.
The rest of the group can't agree on who will tell Bill's wife so they decide to draw cards. Mike, who is the most insensitive guy in the group, draws the lowest card so he gets up to give the bad news to Bill's wife. When Bill's wife answers the door, Mike tells her, "Bill lost $1,000 tonight and is worried about coming home." The angry wife yells, "If he lost $1,000 tell him to drop dead!" Mike answers, "OK, I'll tell him." Magic
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Reported lost 11 Feb. 1942 Signature by depthtok33l |
04-26-23, 04:36 AM | #4256 |
Chief of the Boat
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Q. What do cigarettes and cats have in common?
A. They’re both really bad for your health if you put them in your mouth and set fire to them.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-26-23, 06:49 AM | #4257 |
Chief of the Boat
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Do birds really “sing” or are they actually releasing tiny screams because they’re scared of heights?
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-27-23, 05:16 AM | #4258 |
Chief of the Boat
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The health service in this country is a disgrace. My doctor told me to run 3 miles a day for a month. I’m now completely lost and 90 miles away from home.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-27-23, 05:19 AM | #4259 |
Chief of the Boat
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Yo mama is so stupid that when she was making French toast she got her tongue stuck in the toaster.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-27-23, 01:13 PM | #4260 |
Fleet Admiral
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My son: Dad, I built a model of Mount Everest
Me: Is it to scale? My son: (sighs) No dad, just to look at....
__________________
abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right. |
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