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09-07-19, 06:53 AM | #1156 |
Chief of the Boat
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“Waiter, the steak is smelling very strongly of liquor!” - The waiter backs up 3 steps and asks, “How’s that now?
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Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
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09-08-19, 07:03 AM | #1157 |
Chief of the Boat
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Guest at a restaurant: “I refuse to eat this roast beef. Please call the manager! “
Waiter: “That’s no use. He won’t eat it either.”
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
09-08-19, 07:04 AM | #1158 |
Chief of the Boat
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Q: What do politicians and diapers have in common?
- A: Both should be changed regularly, and both for the same reason.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
09-09-19, 06:24 AM | #1159 |
Chief of the Boat
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I was picking up my girl. Her dad looked at me very sternly and said, "I want her home by midnight, young man!"
I said, "What do you mean? You already own her home!"
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
09-09-19, 06:24 AM | #1160 |
Chief of the Boat
|
Doctor: “Can you describe the snake that bit you?”
Patient: “Yes. It looked like an angry rope. “
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
09-10-19, 08:05 AM | #1161 |
Chief of the Boat
|
Yesterday I learnt that 20 piranhas can strip all flesh off a man within 15 minutes. - Unfortunately, I also lost my job at the local swimming pool.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
09-10-19, 08:05 AM | #1162 |
Chief of the Boat
|
Doctor says to his patient: "You have cancer and Alzheimers."
Patient: "At least I don't have cancer."
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
09-11-19, 09:35 AM | #1163 |
Chief of the Boat
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A wife complains to her husband: “Just look at that couple down the road, how lovely they are. He keeps holding her hand, kissing her, holding the door for her, why can’t you do the same?”
The husband: “Are you mad? I barely know the woman!”
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
09-11-19, 09:35 AM | #1164 |
Chief of the Boat
|
I should have been more suspicious when the Chinese guy offered to “wok my dog for me”…
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
09-12-19, 06:32 AM | #1165 |
Chief of the Boat
|
Did you hear about the new movie constipation?
[No] It hasn’t come out yet.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
09-12-19, 06:34 AM | #1166 |
Chief of the Boat
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We have a strange custom in our office. The food has names there. Yesterday for example I got me a sandwich out of the fridge and its name was "Michael".
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
09-13-19, 06:11 AM | #1167 |
Chief of the Boat
|
Secretary: “Doctor the invisible man has come. He says he has an appointment.”
Doctor: “Tell him I can't see him.”
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
09-13-19, 06:11 AM | #1168 |
Chief of the Boat
|
Two elephants meet a totally naked guy. After a while one elephant says to the other: “I really don’t get how he can feed himself with that thing!”
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
09-14-19, 07:05 AM | #1169 |
Chief of the Boat
|
Grandpa, why don't you have any life insurance?"
"So you can all be really sad when I die."
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
09-14-19, 07:06 AM | #1170 |
Chief of the Boat
|
Famous last words of the gym teacher? "All spears to me."
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
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