Subsim War on Spam II - Page 9

Sean C · 06-06-22, 09:51 PM

Vivid1963 · 06-07-22, 05:17 AM

Regarding the post about spammers - This sketch script is the origin of the term spam - for unwanted email etc. I provide this as a matter of historical and cultural interest to the group....so blame Monty Python`s flying circus..and please dont treat this as spam

From the second series of “Monty Python’s Flying Circus”
Transcribed from “Monty Python’s Previous Record” by Jonathan Partington
(Spam = Spiced Pork And Ham, a sort of cheap luncheon meat)

Scene: A cafe. One table is occupied by a group of Vikings with horned helmets on. A man and his wife enter.

Man (Eric Idle): You sit here, dear.

Wife (Graham Chapman in drag): All right.

Man: (to Waitress)** Morning!

Waitress (Terry Jones, in drag as a bit of a rat-bag): Morning!

Man: Well, what’ve you got?

Waitress: Well, there’s egg and bacon; egg sausage and bacon; egg and spam; egg bacon and spam; egg bacon sausage and spam; spam bacon sausage and spam; spam egg spam spam bacon and spam; spam sausage spam spam bacon spam tomato and spam;

Vikings: (starting to chant) Spam spam spam spam…

Waitress: …spam spam spam egg and spam; spam spam spam spam spam spam baked beans spam spam spam…

Vikings: (singing) Spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam!

Waitress: …or Lobster Thermidor a Crevette with a mornay sauce served in a Provencale manner with shallots and aubergines garnished with truffle pate, brandy and with a fried egg on top and spam.

Wife: Have you got anything without spam?

Waitress: Well, there’s spam egg sausage and spam, that’s not got much spam in it.

Wife: I don’t want ANY spam!

Man: Why can’t she have egg bacon spam and sausage?

Wife: THAT’S got spam in it!

Man: Hasn’t got as much spam in it as spam egg sausage and spam, has it?

Vikings: Spam spam spam spam (crescendo through next few lines)

Wife: Could you do the egg bacon spam and sausage without the spam then?

Waitress: Urgghh!

Wife: What do you mean ‘Urgghh’? I don’t like spam!

Vikings: Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!

Waitress: Shut up!

Vikings: Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!

Waitress: Shut up! (Vikings stop) Bloody Vikings! You can’t have egg bacon spam and sausage without the spam.

Wife: (shrieks) I don’t like spam!

Man: Sshh, dear, don’t cause a fuss. I’ll have your spam. I love it. I’m having spam spam spam spam spam spam spam beaked beans spam spam spam and spam!

Vikings: (singing) Spam spam spam spam. Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!

Waitress: Shut up!! Baked beans are off.

Man: Well could I have her spam instead of the baked beans then?

Waitress: You mean spam spam spam spam spam spam… (but it is too late and the Vikings drown her words)

Vikings: (singing elaborately) Spam spam spam spam. Lovely spam! Wonderful spam! Spam spa-a-a-a-a-am spam spa-a-a-a-a-am spam. Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Spam spam spam spam!

nikimcbee · 06-25-22, 04:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jeff-Groves

Maybe we should launch attempts to spam for something to do.

Hate to see Jimbuna out of a job! His post count would rise expotentually!

I heard the EU was going to tax that, to fund Ukraine.

nikimcbee · 06-25-22, 05:20 PM

Anywhoo. regarding your spam problem, unleash a couple of hungry McBees and your spam will be gone!

via GIPHY</p>">http:// via GIPHY

Kptlt. Neuerburg · 06-25-22, 10:17 PM

THE SPAMMING SAILOR

What do we do with a spamming sailor,
What do we do with a spamming sailor,
What do we do with spamming sailor early in the morning!

Weigh heigh, up she rises
Weigh heigh, up she rises
Weigh heigh, up she rises, early in the morning!

Throw 'im in the brig with bilge rats on 'im,
Throw 'im the brig with bilge rats on 'im,
Throw 'im in the brig with bilge rats on 'im early in the morning!

Weigh heigh, up she rises,
Weigh heigh, up she rises,
Weigh heigh, up she rises, early in the morning!

Give him wack the with the 'ole ban hammer,
Give him wack the with the 'ole ban hammer,
Give him a wack with the 'ole ban hammer early in the morning!

Weigh heigh, up she rises,
Weigh heigh, up she rises,
Weigh heigh, up she rises, early in the morning!

Sorry couldn't resist posting this again!

Eichhörnchen · 06-26-22, 01:09 PM

^ If there's any whacking going to be done around here...

Aktungbby · 06-26-22, 04:21 PM

the acknowleged "right royal" whackmeister'll step in and whack it!

nikimcbee · 06-26-22, 11:03 PM

Wait, so where is all of this spam? It's low carb, and will it be the jalapeno spam? I'll be in the trenches for that!

06-06-22, 09:51 PM	#121
Sean C Grey Wolf Join Date: Jun 2017 Location: Norfolk, VA Posts: 913 Downloads: 12 Uploads: 2	__________________ If you have a question about celestial navigation ... ask me! Celestial Navigation Spreadsheet

06-07-22, 05:17 AM	#122
Vivid1963 Swabbie Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: England Posts: 10 Downloads: 72 Uploads: 0	SPAM...... Regarding the post about spammers - This sketch script is the origin of the term spam - for unwanted email etc. I provide this as a matter of historical and cultural interest to the group....so blame Monty Python`s flying circus..and please dont treat this as spam From the second series of “Monty Python’s Flying Circus” Transcribed from “Monty Python’s Previous Record” by Jonathan Partington (Spam = Spiced Pork And Ham, a sort of cheap luncheon meat) Scene: A cafe. One table is occupied by a group of Vikings with horned helmets on. A man and his wife enter. Man (Eric Idle): You sit here, dear. Wife (Graham Chapman in drag): All right. Man: (to Waitress)** Morning! Waitress (Terry Jones, in drag as a bit of a rat-bag): Morning! Man: Well, what’ve you got? Waitress: Well, there’s egg and bacon; egg sausage and bacon; egg and spam; egg bacon and spam; egg bacon sausage and spam; spam bacon sausage and spam; spam egg spam spam bacon and spam; spam sausage spam spam bacon spam tomato and spam; Vikings: (starting to chant) Spam spam spam spam… Waitress: …spam spam spam egg and spam; spam spam spam spam spam spam baked beans spam spam spam… Vikings: (singing) Spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Waitress: …or Lobster Thermidor a Crevette with a mornay sauce served in a Provencale manner with shallots and aubergines garnished with truffle pate, brandy and with a fried egg on top and spam. Wife: Have you got anything without spam? Waitress: Well, there’s spam egg sausage and spam, that’s not got much spam in it. Wife: I don’t want ANY spam! Man: Why can’t she have egg bacon spam and sausage? Wife: THAT’S got spam in it! Man: Hasn’t got as much spam in it as spam egg sausage and spam, has it? Vikings: Spam spam spam spam (crescendo through next few lines) Wife: Could you do the egg bacon spam and sausage without the spam then? Waitress: Urgghh! Wife: What do you mean ‘Urgghh’? I don’t like spam! Vikings: Lovely spam! Wonderful spam! Waitress: Shut up! Vikings: Lovely spam! Wonderful spam! Waitress: Shut up! (Vikings stop) Bloody Vikings! You can’t have egg bacon spam and sausage without the spam. Wife: (shrieks) I don’t like spam! Man: Sshh, dear, don’t cause a fuss. I’ll have your spam. I love it. I’m having spam spam spam spam spam spam spam beaked beans spam spam spam and spam! Vikings: (singing) Spam spam spam spam. Lovely spam! Wonderful spam! Waitress: Shut up!! Baked beans are off. Man: Well could I have her spam instead of the baked beans then? Waitress: You mean spam spam spam spam spam spam… (but it is too late and the Vikings drown her words) Vikings: (singing elaborately) Spam spam spam spam. Lovely spam! Wonderful spam! Spam spa-a-a-a-a-am spam spa-a-a-a-a-am spam. Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Spam spam spam spam!

06-25-22, 05:20 PM	#124
nikimcbee Fleet Admiral Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Patroling the Slot. Posts: 17,925 Downloads: 90 Uploads: 0	Anywhoo. regarding your spam problem, unleash a couple of hungry McBees and your spam will be gone! via GIPHY</p>">http:// via GIPHY __________________

06-25-22, 10:17 PM	#125
Kptlt. Neuerburg Admiral Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Florida Posts: 2,251 Downloads: 54 Uploads: 0	THE SPAMMING SAILOR What do we do with a spamming sailor, What do we do with a spamming sailor, What do we do with spamming sailor early in the morning! Weigh heigh, up she rises Weigh heigh, up she rises Weigh heigh, up she rises, early in the morning! Throw 'im in the brig with bilge rats on 'im, Throw 'im the brig with bilge rats on 'im, Throw 'im in the brig with bilge rats on 'im early in the morning! Weigh heigh, up she rises, Weigh heigh, up she rises, Weigh heigh, up she rises, early in the morning! Give him wack the with the 'ole ban hammer, Give him wack the with the 'ole ban hammer, Give him a wack with the 'ole ban hammer early in the morning! Weigh heigh, up she rises, Weigh heigh, up she rises, Weigh heigh, up she rises, early in the morning! Sorry couldn't resist posting this again! __________________ "When you're born into this world, you're given a ticket to the freak show. If you're born in America you get a front row seat." - George Carlin

06-26-22, 01:09 PM	#126
Eichhörnchen Starte das Auto Join Date: Aug 2014 Location: The Fens Posts: 15,787 Downloads: 5 Uploads: 0	^ If there's any whacking going to be done around here... __________________

06-26-22, 04:21 PM	#127
Aktungbby Gefallen Engel U-666 Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: On a tilted, overheated, overpopulated spinning mudball on Collision course with Andromeda Galaxy Posts: 27,966 Downloads: 22 Uploads: 0	the acknowleged "right royal" whackmeister'll step in and whack it! __________________ "Only two things are infinite; The Universe and human squirrelyness; and I'm not too sure about the Universe"

06-26-22, 11:03 PM	#128
nikimcbee Fleet Admiral Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Patroling the Slot. Posts: 17,925 Downloads: 90 Uploads: 0	Wait, so where is all of this spam? It's low carb, and will it be the jalapeno spam? I'll be in the trenches for that! __________________