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04-16-23, 05:10 AM | #4231 |
Chief of the Boat
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Just got fired from my job recently for concentrating too much. I work at an orange juice factory!
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-17-23, 07:33 AM | #4232 |
Chief of the Boat
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Went to a barbershop today for a shave. The barber wanted me to put a small wooden ball in my mouth to get a closer shave around my cheeks.
I said: “What if I swallow the ball?” He said: “No problem, just bring it back tomorrow like everyone else.”
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-17-23, 07:36 AM | #4233 |
Chief of the Boat
|
Got an email today from someone trying to sell me Mount Everest for £1 million. I told him it was a bit steep.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-17-23, 04:56 PM | #4234 |
Fleet Admiral
|
My doctor prescribed an anti-gloating cream for me to use
I can't wait to rub it in.
__________________
abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right. |
04-18-23, 05:08 AM | #4235 |
Chief of the Boat
|
I remember the days when ‘Blue Ray’ was an elderly gentleman who drowned in our local swimming pool.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-18-23, 10:09 AM | #4236 |
Chief of the Boat
|
In my previous job I used to take a lot of notes. I got fired after they started checking the cash register.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-19-23, 04:42 AM | #4237 |
Chief of the Boat
|
It’s amazing how quickly the sales staff at Ikea come to “assist you” once you take off your trousers and get into one of their beds.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-19-23, 01:44 PM | #4238 |
Chief of the Boat
|
Man: Hi wanna dance?
Woman: Yeah sure! Man: Ok go and dance, I want to talk to your friend!
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-20-23, 06:35 AM | #4239 |
Chief of the Boat
|
Yo mamas so fat when she went waterskiing someone tried to shoot her with a harpoon.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-20-23, 06:42 AM | #4240 |
Chief of the Boat
|
Yo mama is so stupid she got sacked from her job at the bank for stealing pens.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-21-23, 06:38 AM | #4241 |
Chief of the Boat
|
Just told my wife I’ve been seeing a psychiatrist. She told me she’s been seeing a psychiatrist, a bartender and 2 plumbers.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-21-23, 06:43 AM | #4242 |
Chief of the Boat
|
Whoever persuaded blind people they need to wear sunglasses must have been one hell of a salesman.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-22-23, 05:43 AM | #4243 |
Chief of the Boat
|
After being arrested and interrogated today I’ve now discovered that shouting “bomb” at the top of your voice is a bad way to keep yourself amused while waiting at an airport.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
04-22-23, 06:10 AM | #4244 |
Fleet Admiral
|
Question for parents: When your toddler has pancakes for breakfast, do they pour the syrup on the floor or the table first?
__________________
abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right. |
04-22-23, 06:14 AM | #4245 |
Chief of the Boat
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Q. Why did the zebra beat the horse at chess?
A. Because it’s a-frican genius.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
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