The joke thread II - Page 275

Jimbuna · 03-06-23, 01:01 PM

Accordion to a recent survey 90% of people don’t notice when you replace words with the names of musical instruments.

Platapus · 03-06-23, 01:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jimbuna

Accordion to a recent survey 90% of people don’t notice when you replace words with the names of musical instruments.

But how many notice when the same joke is posted six times in the same thread?

Platapus · 03-06-23, 01:42 PM

Yo mama's so fat, when she goes camping, the bears hide their food.

Jimbuna · 03-07-23, 06:56 AM

What do relationships and video games have in common?

They both start off easy, then they get a little harder and then you end up cheating.

Jimbuna · 03-07-23, 07:03 AM

I’ll never forget my granddad’s last words. “Are you holding that ladder properly?”

Platapus · 03-07-23, 01:55 PM

Yo mama's so fat, if she buys a fur coat, a whole species will become extinct.

Jimbuna · 03-07-23, 02:21 PM

Interviewer: Give me an example of a time you overcame a difficult situation.

Me: I ran out of milk once when making cereal so I came up with the idea of using ice cream.

Jimbuna · 03-08-23, 08:37 AM

Just discovered I have superpowers. I can actually melt ice cubes by staring at them. It takes me quite a long time though.

Jimbuna · 03-08-23, 08:39 AM

A recent survey has shown that a large number of women turn into good drivers.

So if you’re a good driver beware of women who are turning.

Platapus · 03-08-23, 02:32 PM

Yo momma so fat, I swerved to miss her in my car and ran out of gas.

Catfish · 03-08-23, 02:44 PM

Daughter called me and said she would like to have a pony for Christmas.
I said ok.
Though i think the duck last year was good enough.

Jimbuna · 03-09-23, 06:48 AM

I’ve always had a difficult relationship with my parents. When I was first born I didn’t speak to them for 2 years.

Jimbuna · 03-09-23, 06:52 AM

Yo mama is so hairy big foot took a picture of her.

Platapus · 03-09-23, 01:53 PM

My neighbor was in the hospital for eating several plastic toy horses.
His condition is listed as stable.

Jimbuna · 03-09-23, 02:31 PM

Yo mama is so fat instead of wearing earrings she wears onion rings.

03-06-23, 01:01 PM	#4111
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 191,380 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Accordion to a recent survey 90% of people don’t notice when you replace words with the names of musical instruments. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!

03-06-23, 01:42 PM	#4113
Platapus Fleet Admiral Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 19,434 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 0	Yo mama's so fat, when she goes camping, the bears hide their food. __________________ abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right.

03-07-23, 06:56 AM	#4114
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 191,380 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	What do relationships and video games have in common? They both start off easy, then they get a little harder and then you end up cheating. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!

03-07-23, 07:03 AM	#4115
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 191,380 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	I’ll never forget my granddad’s last words. “Are you holding that ladder properly?” __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!

03-07-23, 01:55 PM	#4116
Platapus Fleet Admiral Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 19,434 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 0	Yo mama's so fat, if she buys a fur coat, a whole species will become extinct. __________________ abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right.

03-07-23, 02:21 PM	#4117
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 191,380 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Interviewer: Give me an example of a time you overcame a difficult situation. Me: I ran out of milk once when making cereal so I came up with the idea of using ice cream. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!

03-08-23, 08:37 AM	#4118
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 191,380 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Just discovered I have superpowers. I can actually melt ice cubes by staring at them. It takes me quite a long time though. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!

03-08-23, 08:39 AM	#4119
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 191,380 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	A recent survey has shown that a large number of women turn into good drivers. So if you’re a good driver beware of women who are turning. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!

03-08-23, 02:32 PM	#4120
Platapus Fleet Admiral Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 19,434 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 0	Yo momma so fat, I swerved to miss her in my car and ran out of gas. __________________ abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right.

03-08-23, 02:44 PM	#4121
Catfish Dipped Squirrel Operative Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: ..where the ocean meets the sky Posts: 17,820 Downloads: 38 Uploads: 0	Daughter called me and said she would like to have a pony for Christmas. I said ok. Though i think the duck last year was good enough. __________________ >^..^<*)))>{ All generalizations are wrong.

03-09-23, 06:48 AM	#4122
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 191,380 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	I’ve always had a difficult relationship with my parents. When I was first born I didn’t speak to them for 2 years. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!

03-09-23, 06:52 AM	#4123
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 191,380 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Yo mama is so hairy big foot took a picture of her. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!

03-09-23, 01:53 PM	#4124
Platapus Fleet Admiral Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 19,434 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 0	My neighbor was in the hospital for eating several plastic toy horses. His condition is listed as stable. __________________ abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right.

03-09-23, 02:31 PM	#4125
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 191,380 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Yo mama is so fat instead of wearing earrings she wears onion rings. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!