The joke thread II - Page 204

Jimbuna · 06-04-21, 01:35 PM

A dung beetle goes into a bar and asks, "Yo, is this stool taken?"

Platapus · 06-04-21, 01:37 PM

Is it just me?

I always thought that Gonorrhea would have been a good name for an anti-diarrhea drug.

Jimbuna · 06-05-21, 05:54 AM

The inventor of Auto Correct is a stupid mass hole. He can fake right off.

Jimbuna · 06-05-21, 08:01 AM

Mama kangaroo is jumping along the bush. Suddenly, a small penguin peeks out of her pouch, vomits and says, “Damn this student exchange!”

Jimbuna · 06-06-21, 09:52 AM

“My wife suffers from a drinking problem.”

“Oh is she an alcoholic?”

“No, I am, but she’s the one who suffers.”

Jimbuna · 06-06-21, 09:52 AM

Why is women’s soccer so rare?

It’s quite hard to find enough women willing to wear the same outfit.

Jimbuna · 06-07-21, 11:26 AM

Wife calls her mother: "Today I fought so much with my husband. I am coming to live with you again.

Mother: "No. He should pay for his mistake. I am coming to live with you."

Jimbuna · 06-07-21, 11:27 AM

Doctor: “I’ve found a great new drug that can help you with your sleeping problem.”

Patient: “Great, how often do I have to take it?”

Doctor: “Every two hours.”

Jimbuna · 06-08-21, 10:22 AM

Why did my washing machine stop pumping out water?

And more importantly, where is my hamster?

Jimbuna · 06-08-21, 10:24 AM

Guest at a restaurant: “I refuse to eat this roast beef. Please call the manager! “

Waiter: “That’s no use. He won’t eat it either.”

Jimbuna · 06-09-21, 11:05 AM

“You are so kind, funny and beautiful.”

“Oh come on. You just want to get me to bed.”

“And smart, too!”

Jimbuna · 06-09-21, 11:06 AM

Do you know why women aren’t allowed in space?

To avoid scenarios like: "Houston, we have a problem!"

"What is the problem?"

"Yeah, great, pretend like you don’t know what I’m talking about!"

Platapus · 06-09-21, 04:17 PM

What's the difference between a Hoover and a Harley?

The location of the dirtbag.

Jimbuna · 06-10-21, 01:01 PM

How do you know the ocean greets you?

It waves.

Jimbuna · 06-10-21, 01:02 PM

A wife complains to her husband: “Just look at that couple down the road, how lovely they are. He keeps holding her hand, kissing her, holding the door for her, why can’t you do the same?”

The husband: “Are you mad? I barely know the woman!”

06-04-21, 01:35 PM	#3046
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,344 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	A dung beetle goes into a bar and asks, "Yo, is this stool taken?" __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

06-04-21, 01:37 PM	#3047
Platapus Fleet Admiral Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 18,983 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 0	Is it just me? I always thought that Gonorrhea would have been a good name for an anti-diarrhea drug. __________________ abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right.

06-05-21, 05:54 AM	#3048
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,344 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	The inventor of Auto Correct is a stupid mass hole. He can fake right off. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

06-05-21, 08:01 AM	#3049
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,344 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Mama kangaroo is jumping along the bush. Suddenly, a small penguin peeks out of her pouch, vomits and says, “Damn this student exchange!” __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

06-06-21, 09:52 AM	#3050
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,344 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	“My wife suffers from a drinking problem.” “Oh is she an alcoholic?” “No, I am, but she’s the one who suffers.” __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

06-06-21, 09:52 AM	#3051
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,344 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Why is women’s soccer so rare? It’s quite hard to find enough women willing to wear the same outfit. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

06-07-21, 11:26 AM	#3052
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,344 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Wife calls her mother: "Today I fought so much with my husband. I am coming to live with you again. Mother: "No. He should pay for his mistake. I am coming to live with you." __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

06-07-21, 11:27 AM	#3053
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,344 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Doctor: “I’ve found a great new drug that can help you with your sleeping problem.” Patient: “Great, how often do I have to take it?” Doctor: “Every two hours.” __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

06-08-21, 10:22 AM	#3054
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,344 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Why did my washing machine stop pumping out water? And more importantly, where is my hamster? __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

06-08-21, 10:24 AM	#3055
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,344 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Guest at a restaurant: “I refuse to eat this roast beef. Please call the manager! “ Waiter: “That’s no use. He won’t eat it either.” __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

06-09-21, 11:05 AM	#3056
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,344 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	“You are so kind, funny and beautiful.” “Oh come on. You just want to get me to bed.” “And smart, too!” __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

06-09-21, 11:06 AM	#3057
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,344 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Do you know why women aren’t allowed in space? To avoid scenarios like: "Houston, we have a problem!" "What is the problem?" "Yeah, great, pretend like you don’t know what I’m talking about!" __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

06-09-21, 04:17 PM	#3058
Platapus Fleet Admiral Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 18,983 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 0	What's the difference between a Hoover and a Harley? The location of the dirtbag. __________________ abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right.

06-10-21, 01:01 PM	#3059
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,344 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	How do you know the ocean greets you? It waves. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

06-10-21, 01:02 PM	#3060
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,344 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	A wife complains to her husband: “Just look at that couple down the road, how lovely they are. He keeps holding her hand, kissing her, holding the door for her, why can’t you do the same?” The husband: “Are you mad? I barely know the woman!” __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)