To be a GOOD Liberal...

SUBMAN1 · 02-09-09, 11:35 PM

You have to believe the following:

1. You have to believe the AIDS virus is spread by the lack of Federal funding.

2. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach the same kids about sex.

3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding Americans are more of a threat than U.S. nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Chinese communists.

4. You have to believe that there was no art before Federal funding.

5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical, documented changes in the earth's climate, and more affected by yuppies driving SUV's.

6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial but being homosexual is natural.

7. You have to be against capital punishment but support abortion on demand.

8. You have to believe that businesses create oppression and governments create prosperity.

9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but looney activists who've never been outside Seattle do.

10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.

11. You have to believe that the military, not corrupt politicians, start wars.

12. You have to believe the NRA is bad because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good, because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.

13. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.

14. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, General Robert E. Lee, or Thomas Edison.

15. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides aren't.

16. You have to believe Hillary Clinton is really a lady.

17. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried is because the right people haven't been in charge.

18. You have to believe conservatives telling the truth belong in jail, but a liar and a sex offender belongs in the White House.

19. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag, transvestites and bestiality should be Constitutionally protected and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.

20. You have to believe that illegal Democratic party funding by the Chinese is somehow in the best interest of the United States.

21. You have to believe that anyone who beats you in an intellectual arguments is a bigot.

22. You have to believe that it's better for a woman to be raped and murdered than for a rapist to be shot.

Feel free to add what you have observed from the liberals around you , such as

The only reason you would want a Suppressor for your gun is to poach game and assassinate Democrats.

That keeping guns out of Students, Employee's and management hands will keep everyone safe and no criminal would ever force their way into a gun free zone - with a gun.

A Very Super Market · 02-09-09, 11:38 PM

More generalizations that would shame O'Reilly himself. A few of these are pretty funny though, especially 16 :rotfl:

SUBMAN1 · 02-09-09, 11:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by A Very Super Market

More generalizations that would shame O'Reilly himself. A few of these are pretty funny though, especially 16 :rotfl:

All are true as far as I can see. #16 especially.

-S

baggygreen · 02-09-09, 11:52 PM

I've missed these lately subman!

16 is hilarious.

heres a quicky - who is margaret sanger?

SUBMAN1 · 02-10-09, 12:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by baggygreen

I've missed these lately subman!

16 is hilarious.

heres a quicky - who is margaret sanger?

Sorry. Have been busy lately. Buried in work up to my eyeballs!

Not much is humorous when working hard. This one made me smirk a bit though so I shared it.

Not sure who this sanger person is. Sorry once again.

-S

Enigma · 02-10-09, 12:55 AM

...and to be a good republican you have to do what, swallow this bull**** whole?

fatty · 02-10-09, 09:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SUBMAN1

The only reason you would want a Suppressor for your gun is to poach game and assassinate Democrats.

Hi Secret Service!

Kapt Z · 02-11-09, 11:50 AM

Maybe I am not a 'good' liberal after all!

Maybe I am just a 'bad' conservative!

02-09-09, 11:38 PM	#2
A Very Super Market The Old Man Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Deep in the Wild Canadian suburbs. Posts: 1,468 Downloads: 0 Uploads: 0	More generalizations that would shame O'Reilly himself. A few of these are pretty funny though, especially 16 :rotfl: __________________ The entire German garrison of Vanviken, right here in your thread!

02-10-09, 12:55 AM	#6
Enigma The Old Man Join Date: May 2005 Location: At comms depth, obviously. Posts: 1,476 Downloads: 7 Uploads: 0	...and to be a good republican you have to do what, swallow this bull**** whole? __________________ "Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it." -Mark Twain

02-09-09, 11:35 PM	#1
SUBMAN1 Rear Admiral Join Date: Apr 2005 Posts: 11,866 Downloads: 0 Uploads: 0	To be a GOOD Liberal... You have to believe the following: 1. You have to believe the AIDS virus is spread by the lack of Federal funding. 2. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach the same kids about sex. 3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding Americans are more of a threat than U.S. nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Chinese communists. 4. You have to believe that there was no art before Federal funding. 5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical, documented changes in the earth's climate, and more affected by yuppies driving SUV's. 6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial but being homosexual is natural. 7. You have to be against capital punishment but support abortion on demand. 8. You have to believe that businesses create oppression and governments create prosperity. 9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but looney activists who've never been outside Seattle do. 10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it. 11. You have to believe that the military, not corrupt politicians, start wars. 12. You have to believe the NRA is bad because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good, because it supports certain parts of the Constitution. 13. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high. 14. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, General Robert E. Lee, or Thomas Edison. 15. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides aren't. 16. You have to believe Hillary Clinton is really a lady. 17. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried is because the right people haven't been in charge. 18. You have to believe conservatives telling the truth belong in jail, but a liar and a sex offender belongs in the White House. 19. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag, transvestites and bestiality should be Constitutionally protected and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal. 20. You have to believe that illegal Democratic party funding by the Chinese is somehow in the best interest of the United States. 21. You have to believe that anyone who beats you in an intellectual arguments is a bigot. 22. You have to believe that it's better for a woman to be raped and murdered than for a rapist to be shot. Feel free to add what you have observed from the liberals around you , such as The only reason you would want a Suppressor for your gun is to poach game and assassinate Democrats. That keeping guns out of Students, Employee's and management hands will keep everyone safe and no criminal would ever force their way into a gun free zone - with a gun. __________________

02-09-09, 11:52 PM	#4
baggygreen Sea Lord Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Canberra, ACT, Down Under (really On Top) Posts: 1,880 Downloads: 7 Uploads: 0	I've missed these lately subman! 16 is hilarious. heres a quicky - who is margaret sanger?

02-11-09, 11:50 AM	#8
Kapt Z Grey Wolf Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: ...somewhere in the swamps of Jersey. Posts: 909 Downloads: 157 Uploads: 0	Maybe I am not a 'good' liberal after all! Maybe I am just a 'bad' conservative!