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03-21-20, 09:34 AM | #1636 |
Chief of the Boat
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I walked into the gym and see a bunch of ladies working out, I ask the guy who is running the gym,
“Sir, what machine should I use to impress the ladies?” He smiles says “Try the ATM in the lobby”.
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Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
03-22-20, 09:32 AM | #1637 |
Chief of the Boat
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Why is Cupid is a symbol for love? Personally, I find the idea of an arrow being shot through your heart by a flying baby extremely horrifying.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
03-22-20, 09:36 AM | #1638 |
Chief of the Boat
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Got stopped by a women in the street today. She said “Excuse me sir, have you had an accident in the last 3 years that wasn’t your fault? I said, “Yes, she’s nearly 3 now.”
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
03-23-20, 01:12 PM | #1639 |
Chief of the Boat
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Disabled toilets.
Ironically, the only toilets that are big enough to run around in.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
03-23-20, 01:16 PM | #1640 |
Chief of the Boat
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Apparently when someone messages you a picture of their new baby it’s offensive to send a message back saying “Better luck next time”!
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
03-24-20, 09:49 AM | #1641 |
Chief of the Boat
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Women colour their hair, get boob-jobs, plastic surgery, liposuction, wear heels to increase their height…
Then complain that there’s no real men out there.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
03-24-20, 09:51 AM | #1642 |
Chief of the Boat
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After 3 years of marriage, me and the wife had our first real fight last night.
I called my dad for advice on how to fix things. He told me to apologize and admit I was wrong. I was really looking for advice on how to dispose of the body.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
03-25-20, 02:11 PM | #1643 |
Chief of the Boat
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__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
03-25-20, 02:13 PM | #1644 |
Silent Hunter
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: London. UK
Posts: 4,140
Downloads: 278
Uploads: 0
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Camilla Parker Bowles is wondering if she will ever become queen
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03-25-20, 02:15 PM | #1645 |
Chief of the Boat
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Q. What does an Ikea cabinet and a marriage have in common?
A. One screw out of place and the whole thing falls apart.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
03-26-20, 08:57 AM | #1646 |
Chief of the Boat
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Wife: If women ruled the world there would be no wars.
Husband: Yeah that’s true. Wars require strategy, planning and logic.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
03-26-20, 08:58 AM | #1647 |
Chief of the Boat
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Murphy: Paddy why are you talking to that envelope?
Paddy: I’m trying to send a voicemail.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
03-27-20, 08:05 AM | #1648 |
Chief of the Boat
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Q. What’s the difference between a flying pig and a politician?
A. The letter F.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
03-27-20, 08:07 AM | #1649 |
Chief of the Boat
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Just failed my job interview after the following question:
Interviewer: How would you describe yourself? Me: I normally do it verbally using words but on this occasion I’ve actually prepared a dance.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
03-28-20, 12:49 PM | #1650 |
Chief of the Boat
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My wife recently told me that sex is a lot better on holiday… I was really upset when I got the postcard.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
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