Dear Steve Thread - Page 10

Sailor Steve · 12-19-12, 04:17 AM

Since you were addressing Armistead, I won't mention that I took no offence at all. Nor will I say that I wasn't commenting on the compliment itself, I was commenting on the fact that he thought I was serious about being too old to care.

It's like when I say "Some people are born stupid. I've had to work hard my whole life to get this way...and I'm proud of the job I've done." Most people laugh at that, but every now and then someone says "Don't say that! You're not stupid!"

At that point I always feel compelled to say "You do realize I was joking?"

But I didn't say that either, since you weren't talking to me.

Which means I didn't suddenly turn serious now, because I didn't say anything.

Jimbuna · 12-19-12, 08:01 AM

Dear Steve

I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you forever. I’ve been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell.

Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers.

You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & husband.

Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, I’m gone.

Your EX-Husband
P.S. don’t try to find me. Your brother & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!

Sailor Steve · 12-19-12, 08:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jimbuna

Dear Steve...blah...blah...blah...Have a great life!

Thank God for small favors! It took long enough for you to get the hint! What's the point of being gay when your 'partner' acts just like a flaming woman?!?!

Good riddance to the both of ya!

Peace at last.

Herr-Berbunch · 12-19-12, 08:06 AM

Dr Steve

I used to be able to type but ahrelej alkjgkajlflakjgoath[pweirou;lxf.c=q903j2f;gj

Can you fheltj?

Sailor Steve · 12-19-12, 08:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Herr-Berbunch

Dr Steve

I used to be able to type but ahrelej alkjgkajlflakjgoath[pweirou;lxf.c=q903j2f;gj

Can you fheltj?

Yes I can, but you wouldn't like the answer. Just take two urhwp[84 and try to get plenty of eq8hg.

Herr-Berbunch · 12-19-12, 08:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sailor Steve

Yes I can, but you wouldn't like the answer. Just take two urhwp[84 and try to get plenty of eq8hg.

thpoaighjs

Jimbuna · 12-19-12, 08:24 AM

Dear Steve

You are taking an age finding out the origin of the City of Beunos Aries

Red October1984 · 12-19-12, 08:28 AM

Dear Steve,

I've been trying to staple water to a tree without a bag for days now. I am getting hungry and cold. The water won't staple to the tree no matter how hard I try.

Sincerely,

Flabbergasted in Missouri

Sailor Steve · 12-19-12, 08:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jimbuna

Dear Steve

You are taking an age finding out the origin of the City of Beunos Aries

¡Eso es porque sigues hablando conmigo!

Sailor Steve · 12-19-12, 08:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Red October1984

Dear Steve,

I've been trying to staple water to a tree without a bag for days now. I am getting hungry and cold. The water won't staple to the tree no matter how hard I try.

Sincerely,

Flabbergasted in Missouri

Well of course! Everybody knows you can't staple water to a tree! You have to use Krazy Glue!

As for being hungry and cold, you need to buy my patented edible overcoat. Now on sale for $250.53.

Red October1984 · 12-19-12, 08:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sailor Steve

Well of course! Everybody knows you can't staple water to a tree! You have to use Krazy Glue!

As for being hungry and cold, you need to buy my patented edible overcoat. Now on sale for $250.53.

Thanks Pal! I am no longer Flabbergasted. But, I am broke. Do you have any other alternatives?

Penguin · 12-19-12, 08:48 AM

Dear Steve,
I've got a problem.
All the animals make fun of me because I can't fly. Even the simpleton pidgeons laugh at me, not even mentioning those pesky insects. The sea lions just regard me as a victim and keep on bullying me.
Airlines don't accept fish as payment and I'm allergic to LSD, what can I do?

sincerely,
helpless in Antarctica

Sailor Steve · 12-19-12, 08:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Red October1984

Thanks Pal! I am no longer Flabbergasted. But, I am broke. Do you have any other alternatives?

Cut down a cactus and hollow it out. You can eat the insides, drink the juice, and have a warm coat as well. An extra added bonus - your new coat has spiny-spines to protect you from prowling night-thingies!

Sailor Steve · 12-19-12, 08:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Penguin

Dear Steve,
I've got a problem.
All the animals make fun of me because I can't fly. Even the simpleton pidgeons laugh at me, not even mentioning those pesky insects. The sea lions just regard me as a victim and keep on bullying me.
Airlines don't accept fish as payment and I'm allergic to LSD, what can I do?

sincerely,
helpless in Antarctica

You can't fly??? What a loser!

Penguin · 12-19-12, 09:02 AM

Dear Steve,

my husband is awol. He has been in a bad mood, untill today. He told me he found a great adviser in the net to help him.

Some minutes ago, he logged out from his laptop, went to the edge of the ice and flipped off some Orcas. Then he stuck a "bite me" sign on his body and jumped into the water.

How long do I have to wait to claim his laptop?

Sincerely,
Frau P

12-19-12, 04:17 AM	#136
Sailor Steve Eternal Patrol Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: High in the mountains of Utah Posts: 50,369 Downloads: 745 Uploads: 249	Since you were addressing Armistead, I won't mention that I took no offence at all. Nor will I say that I wasn't commenting on the compliment itself, I was commenting on the fact that he thought I was serious about being too old to care. It's like when I say "Some people are born stupid. I've had to work hard my whole life to get this way...and I'm proud of the job I've done." Most people laugh at that, but every now and then someone says "Don't say that! You're not stupid!" At that point I always feel compelled to say "You do realize I was joking?" But I didn't say that either, since you weren't talking to me. Which means I didn't suddenly turn serious now, because I didn't say anything. __________________ “Never do anything you can't take back.” —Rocky Russo

12-19-12, 08:01 AM	#137
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 190,788 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Dear Steve I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you forever. I’ve been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell. Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & husband. Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, I’m gone. Your EX-Husband P.S. don’t try to find me. Your brother & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life! __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!

12-19-12, 08:06 AM	#139
Herr-Berbunch Kaiser Bill's batman Join Date: May 2010 Location: AN72 Posts: 13,203 Downloads: 76 Uploads: 0	Dr Steve I used to be able to type but ahrelej alkjgkajlflakjgoath[pweirou;lxf.c=q903j2f;gj Can you fheltj? __________________

12-19-12, 08:24 AM	#142
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 190,788 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Dear Steve You are taking an age finding out the origin of the City of Beunos Aries __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!

12-19-12, 08:28 AM	#143
Red October1984 Airplane Nerd Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: Texas Posts: 6,243 Downloads: 115 Uploads: 0	Dear Steve, I've been trying to staple water to a tree without a bag for days now. I am getting hungry and cold. The water won't staple to the tree no matter how hard I try. Sincerely, Flabbergasted in Missouri __________________

12-19-12, 08:48 AM	#147
Penguin Ocean Warrior Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Rheinische Republik Posts: 3,322 Downloads: 92 Uploads: 0	Dear Steve, I've got a problem. All the animals make fun of me because I can't fly. Even the simpleton pidgeons laugh at me, not even mentioning those pesky insects. The sea lions just regard me as a victim and keep on bullying me. Airlines don't accept fish as payment and I'm allergic to LSD, what can I do? sincerely, helpless in Antarctica

12-19-12, 09:02 AM	#150
Penguin Ocean Warrior Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Rheinische Republik Posts: 3,322 Downloads: 92 Uploads: 0	Dear Steve, my husband is awol. He has been in a bad mood, untill today. He told me he found a great adviser in the net to help him. Some minutes ago, he logged out from his laptop, went to the edge of the ice and flipped off some Orcas. Then he stuck a "bite me" sign on his body and jumped into the water. How long do I have to wait to claim his laptop? Sincerely, Frau P