Parenting Question; 20+ but doesn't want to leave

[Skybird]

Originally Posted by Shady Bill

She works very hard, has a little first job. She takes college classes online, at night. All very admirable.

So she is under full steam!? Sounds as if she tries what she can to imporve her life situation, but either cnanot afford an own household, or has plans with that money she earns!? Maybe to make independence affordable in the future?

With 20, I really see not the big problem so far when people are not lazy in hotel Mama. People are different, some are eager to conquer the world, some less so, and such differences are fine. Who says we all must tick according to the same norm?

Just a few decades ago, often three generations lived under the same roof, btw. It had its pros and cons.

Ask her for her plans. Its the obvious thing to do.


And no, not everbyody is a ripe, matzure adult at his 18th birthday. Some are early. Some need more time. Thats how it is.


20, my God, whats the problem. As long as she is not lazy and just dreams through the day, but indeed seems to follow her charted course that she has plot. It makes no sense to say "back in my days it was like this and that." Times have changed, so has the world. It starts with costs of living in big cities, and ends with mere availability of flats, places to stay, student homes, whatever. Its all much more difficult than at my time back then, and I would not need to do it again today.

[Shady Bill]

Improve her situation?

Originally Posted by Skybird

Sounds as if she tries what she can to imporve her life situation, but either cnanot afford an own household, or has plans with that money she earns!? Maybe to make independence affordable in the future?


I take it you don't have a 20 year old daughter, Skybird? Make-up and clothing...that's where 75% of her money goes Hence my concerns.

Her and her boyfriend are "saving for a house"...at current rate of saving they will be looking at homes in the year 2032.

Just a few decades ago, often three generations lived under the same roof, btw. It had its pros and cons.

I had my mother-in-law live with us during Covid for 8 weeks...I nearly killed the woman. The three generations thing won't work for me

[Skybird]

Originally Posted by Shady Bill

I take it you don't have a 20 year old daughter, Skybird?

No.

Make-up and clothing...that's where 75% of her money goes Hence my concerns.

Ah, so not as much oriented on a realistic goal, but living from one day to the next!? If so, this makes your worries clearer.


Hot tar and feathers may do the trick.

[Shady Bill]

Originally Posted by Skybird

has plans with that money she earns!? Maybe to make independence affordable in the future?

I showed this to my wife, we both had a good laugh Skybird


I said to her laughing loudly; "Come look at what this guy wrote!"