School is out, English courses are over

Hottentot · 10-06-12, 10:29 AM

As forigner I zink zis is realy konfusink system und shud be replaced viz a nev one. Fortunately ze gud old EU is already workink on it:

The European Commission have just announced an agreement whereby
English will be the official language of the EU, rather than German, which
was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's
government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and
has accepted a five year phase in plan that would be known as "EuroEnglish".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will
make the sivil servants jump for joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour
of the "k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have 1 less
letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with the "f". This will make words like
"fotograf" 20% shorter.

In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be
expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always
ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of
the silent "e"s in the language is disgraseful, and they should go away.

By the 4th year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th"
with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords
kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer
kombinations of leters. After zis fifz year, ve vil hav a realy sensibl
riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubls or difikultis and evrivun vil find it
ezi to understand each ozer

ZE DREAM VIL FINALI KUM TRU!

kranz · 10-06-12, 12:26 PM

I'm sooo happy that Skybird's problem has been solved <sighs with relief>

However, I have a similar problem, too, tho it's between 'n' and 'q'.
So, which is the correct form - Iran or Iraq ????

Oberon · 10-06-12, 12:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kranz

I'm sooo happy that Skybird's problem has been solved <sighs with relief>

However, I have a similar problem, too, tho it's between 'n' and 'q'.
So, which is the correct form - Iran or Iraq ????

Until 2003 the correct form was Iraq, however there was a change made around 2003 and now it's Iran.

kranz · 10-07-12, 05:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Oberon

Until 2003 the correct form was Iraq, however there was a change made around 2003 and now it's Iran.

makes sense

can't wait to see when he gets to the lesson: the difference between record and record.

Skybird · 10-07-12, 05:43 AM

Thanks everybody. I knew the "o" versus "ou" thing being English and American, but "s" and "z" being a national thing too - well, reading here rang the echo of a distant memory. I probably have learned it back then, and then forgot again.

I will take relief from the info and mix all cases all within even just one sentence, but now I will enjoy it.

10-06-12, 10:29 AM	#1
Hottentot Sea Lord Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: My private socialist utopia of Finland Posts: 1,918 Downloads: 4 Uploads: 0	As forigner I zink zis is realy konfusink system und shud be replaced viz a nev one. Fortunately ze gud old EU is already workink on it: The European Commission have just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU, rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five year phase in plan that would be known as "EuroEnglish". In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump for joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of the "k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have 1 less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with the "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter. In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent "e"s in the language is disgraseful, and they should go away. By the 4th year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v". During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters. After zis fifz year, ve vil hav a realy sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubls or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand each ozer ZE DREAM VIL FINALI KUM TRU! __________________ Хотели как лучше, а получилось как всегда.

10-07-12, 05:43 AM	#5
Skybird Soaring Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: the mental asylum named Germany Posts: 42,714 Downloads: 10 Uploads: 0	Thanks everybody. I knew the "o" versus "ou" thing being English and American, but "s" and "z" being a national thing too - well, reading here rang the echo of a distant memory. I probably have learned it back then, and then forgot again. I will take relief from the info and mix all cases all within even just one sentence, but now I will enjoy it. __________________ If you feel nuts, consult an expert.

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10-06-12, 12:26 PM	#2
kranz The Old Man Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Poland Posts: 1,430 Downloads: 5 Uploads: 0	I'm sooo happy that Skybird's problem has been solved <sighs with relief> However, I have a similar problem, too, tho it's between 'n' and 'q'. So, which is the correct form - Iran or Iraq ????