Warning of public sector strike threat to UK travel

[jumpy]

Mark Steel: Teaching? Anyone can do that


Wednesday, 29 June 2011



Tomorrow's strike of teachers and civil servants should be one of the most enjoyable industrial disputes, now that Michael Gove has asked parents to pop into school to take the lessons themselves. That ought to keep teachers in their place, knowing they've been replaced by a French teacher who says, "Now listen, I've not actually done much French as such. But I HAVE delivered wardrobes for one of Norfolk's leading furniture suppliers.
"So to start with, let's see how you deal with a problem that might occur while you're on holiday in Brittany. You're on the beach, and suddenly remember you need to get a wardrobe delivered to your uncle's house in Great Yarmouth. You ring Terry at 'All Over Anglia' Ltd, who don't speak a word of French by the way, so how do you phrase your question to him?"


And teaching methods now are so different from when most parents were at school. So they'd leave the kids bemused, saying things like, "This morning we're learning the causes of the independence movement in India. Now as I understood it, the Indian is a basically happy chap but easily roused by troublemakers, so pad that out a bit and you should scrape an O-level."
And if anyone can pop along and help out, presumably somewhere a lucky class will be told: "Because of the strike, today you're very lucky to have your biology lesson taken by Mr Jonathan King."
The worry is the Government will decide all jobs requiring at least a couple of hours' training can also be done by whoever fancies popping in. Spirited members of the public with a spare hour can nip along and do some architecture, or heart surgery, or design an engine or fly a plane. That might make these cosseted workforces realise they're not as invaluable as they think.
The reason they're so determined to keep the schools open is, according to Michael Gove, the strike will "damage the children's education". Opponents of the strike also say the teachers are "taking out their grievance on our children". So it must be an extremely important day they'll be missing. Presumably Michael Gove was just as furious when schools were closed for the royal wedding, yelling: "How dare this ceremony condemn an entire generation to a life of miserable failure? Couldn't they have got married on a Saturday like normal people, for 20 minutes around tea-time so it didn't disturb their homework?"
Presumably there must be thousands of people whose life has been a wasted litany of drug abuse, because the school was shut for a general election in 1979, and on a day when they'd have learned about pollination as well, so they ended up a botanical idiot and now they sleep in the park. And to make it worse they can't even name the plants they're next to.
And in 20 years' time the most successful people in science, business and sport will be those who gained a huge advantage because their school stayed open tomorrow, so they were taught chemistry by a retired accountant, who may have spilt acid over a girl, but put the children before his selfish needs and that's the main thing.
Thankfully, with our children being so damaged by a day off, (and children across Britain do seem extremely upset by this), they're not so delicate about other trends in education. The fact they'll all be 50 grand in debt when they leave university, for example, doesn't seem to trouble them at all. And if fewer people are attracted to teaching because the pension scheme is worse, so there will be more schools where, in some subjects, the kids are without a teacher at all, that should be to their advantage, especially if it means they get taught instead by a biscuit salesman who sees a fight, barges to the front and yells: "Go on, Jimmy, SMACK him," and ends the day by saying "WAIT. The bell is a signal for you, it is NOT a signal for me. Oh bollocks, hang on, I've got
that wrong."

I'm not a massive fan of mark steel - he's quite funny sometimes and I don't always go with his ideas on politics, but what he says above rings true with the way the government is decrying the teacher strikes like it is going to blight the lives of countless children.... like the university fees fiasco.

There's a lot of hyperbole, but the government (any of them really, past, present or future) seems to be so radically detached from the reality that most ordinary people experience it's a wonder they even condescend to think about us at all.
An example: I had a look at the elected members declaration of interests recently - basically a list of all mp's earnings and expenses. One back bench mp earned in excess of £48,000.00 for such things as after dinner speaking and 'consultancy' fees to businesses, this was on top of his earnings as an elected member of parliament. £48,000.00 - that's more than most 'average' people will earn in two years. No wonder they have no real affinity for the man in the street.
Oooh, striking and unions are evil, how dare people stand up for their rights and pensions! tut tut... well you should have heard the negative discussions in the houses of parliament when mp's were faced with having their expenses claims audited, you may have been forgiven for thinking that perhaps this disgraceful indignity was akin to having a forced prostate examination on top of that plinth in trafalgar square!


On the news a couple of days ago, reporting on the greece rioting over the austerity vote, you had young and highly qualified people (one was a civil engineer) out of work and angry about the whole state of affairs and having no say in the cause or solution to their country's massive financial problems, apart from the fact that they will have to bear the weighty cost of it (unlike the elected politicians - just like our lot then...).
A minister was saying how these people are angry at there being no jobs and severe financial hardship that they did not cause by just trying to earn a living. What she said next staggered me - paraphrased "all these people rioting in the street are angry about all the economic hardships and loss of employment, which is understandable to some extent, but the problem with these people is that they are just angry and apart from that they bring no solutions for the problems" Well, you're the politician, the elected member of government, isn't that supposed to be your job?

As paxman said on news night the other day (regarding greece's financial problems) 'venal and incompetent'. Had I not heard the précis I could have sworn he was referring to the UK.


I know plenty of teachers and they have a bloody hard job. I know people in public service, they have a largely thankless job, with until recently was relatively immune to the market forces that dictate employment and redundancy that is rampant in the profit motivated private sector. Now they are waking up to the fact that there is no security in their jobs and they are being forced to give up what they have worked for and already faced compromise agreements in respect of pay and pensions and the like. Now they are expected to take further cuts of their means and future security?
FFS. My own personal feeling is that this country ought to look to its own first in how it spends its money and stop giving it away to corrupt dictatorial regimes who foster extremism, before we slash spending on our own people. Not that these cuts will make any difference to the national debt - then never have done in the past and they will not now.

I have been living the economic dream of redundancy and unemployment right through the recession and am now faced with rising debt (I was totally debt free at the start) and the very real prospect of creditors knocking at my door, not because of extravagant and decadent spending and lifestyle choices, but to maintain a subsistence existence, treading water, using the barest minimum of resources and spending only on what I need to live on and nothing more. The lack of decent paying work to meet the basic needs of food shelter and warmth is crippling.
I have every sympathy with those choosing to strike over pay and pensions - they only have to take one look at people in positions like mine to see their fate if they just stand there and do nothing. Some might say they ought to be grateful they still have jobs. True. But if they don't fight for their dues they will see it all taken away from them by people who already have their seat on the gravy train guaranteed.

To quote spitting image over politicians: "it's better to be on the train pissing out of the window than running along the platform trying to piss in."

If I was not so fundamentally effected by the recession and subsequent cuts and the knock on effect to the industry my employment is dependent upon, I would laugh and laugh and laugh out loud at the irrepressible hilarity of it all.

There is, however, nothing remotely funny about it.

Nothing at all.