Russian Snow

[StdDev]

A Russian couple were walking down the street in Moscow one night,when the man felt a drop hit his nose.

"I think it's raining," he said to his wife.

"No, that felt more like snow to me," she replied.

"No, I'm sure it was just rain," he said.

Well, as these things go, they were about to have a major argument about whether it was raining or snowing. Just then they saw a minor communist party official walking toward them.

"Let's not fight about it," the man said, "Let's ask Comrade Rudolph whether it's officially raining or snowing."

As the official approached, the man asked, "Tell us, Comrade Rudolph, is it officially raining or snowing?"

"It's raining, of course," he answered, and walked on.

But the woman insisted, "I know that felt like snow!"
To which the man replied,
.
.
.
.
.


"Rudolph the Red knows rain,dear"

[baggygreen]

groan.....


:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:its the first i've heard of it, i like.

[Reaves]

Haha for some reason I love jokes of this quality.

[StdDev]

Originally Posted by Reaves

Haha for some reason I love jokes of this quality.

:p Really!!??? :p
In that case.....


The Lone Ranger and Tonto walked into a saloon and sat down to drink a Beer.
After a few minutes, a big, tall cowboy walked in and asked, "Who owns the big white horse outside?"
The Lone Ranger stood up, hitched his gun belt, and answered, "I do... why?"
The cowboy looked at the Lone Ranger and replied, "I just thought you'd like to know... your horse outside is about dead!"
The Lone Ranger and Tonto rushed outside... and sure enough, Silver was ready to die from heat exhaustion.
The Lone Ranger got the horse some water... and soon Silver was starting to feel a little better.
The Lone Ranger turned to Tonto and said, "Tonto, I want you to run around Silver... and see if you can create enough of a breeze to cool him and make him feel better."
Tonto said, "Sure, Kemosabe." And took off running circles around Silver.
Not able to do anything else but wait, the Lone Ranger returned to the saloon to finish his beer.
A few minutes later, another cowboy struts into the bar and asks, "Who owns that big white horse outside?"
The Lone Ranger stands again... and claims, "I do! What's wrong with him this time?"
The cowboy looks him in the eye and says, "Nothing......











But you left your injun running!!!

[TarJak]

And in finance news:

Following the problems in the sub-prime lending market in America and
the run on Northern Rock in the UK, uncertainty has now hit Japan.
In the last 7 days Origami Bank has folded, Sumo Bank has gone belly up
and Bonsai Bank announced plans to cut some of its branches.
Yesterday, it was announced that Karaoke Bank is up for sale and will
likely be going for a song while today shares in Kamikaze Bank were
suspended after they nose-dived.
Furthermore, 500 staff at Karate Bank got the chop and analysts report
that there is something fishy going
on at Sushi Bank where it is feared that staff may get a raw deal !!

[Reaves]

In Melbourne, Victoria a man is hit by a car twice a day.











Police are trying to locate him before he really hurts himself.

[jumpy]

That's it...

I'm calling the police. You guys can't be allowed to commit such crimes with impunity.

I was even listening to Holst's 'The bringer of jollity' whilst reading these. Can you guess how jolly I didn't feel?

Can you hear the sirens yet?:hmm:

[StdDev]

And then there's the Scottish Wedding.....


Two Scots, the best man Archie and the groom Jock are sitting in the pub discussing Jock's forthcoming wedding.

'Ach, it's all going to be grand", says Jock. "I've everything organized already, the flowers, the church, the cards, the reception, the rings, the minister, and you've taken care of ma stag night".

Archie nods approvingly.

"Havens, I've even bought a kilt to be married in," continued Jock.

"A kilt?" exclaims Archie, "That's braw; you'll look pure deed smart in that!"

"And what's the tartan?" Archie then enquires.

"Och," says Jock, "I'd imagine she'll be in white....."

[STEED]

This thread should come with a warning, you must be drunk to read it or it will make no sense.

[JSLTIGER]

[bigboywooly]

I bought a teddy bear for £10
And I named it Mohammed

I sold it for £20

My question is

Have I made a prophet

[STEED]

Originally Posted by bigboywooly

I bought a teddy bear for £10
And I named it Mohammed

I sold it for £20

My question is

Have I made a prophet

I heard it in the office at the bus stop and on the radio, now here on SubSims.

[SUBMAN1]

Originally Posted by bigboywooly

I bought a teddy bear for £10
And I named it Mohammed

I sold it for £20

My question is

Have I made a prophet

:rotfl:

[jumpy]

In the same theme as that last joke...

[Chock]

Well, here's my favourite crap joke:

Two fish are in a tank, one turns to the other and says 'You drive and I'll work the gun turret'

Chock