My wife is being unreasonable. Need advice

Telemon · 11-30-10, 08:30 AM

Greetings from frozen England.
I need advice. My wife is being unreasonable.
I’m playing SH3/GWX and I’m trying for full realism.
Last night it dawned on me that although ‘in game’ it was Feb ’40 in mid Atlantic with 15mtrs + winds here was I sitting in my warm (60F/20C) corner in the lounge with bikkies and hot cocoa to hand.
This was not right, not real, faked, I was a hypocrite!!
I went upstairs and put on my cold weather gear, sou’wester and rubber boots. Came down and opened wide the patio door. This was more like it. minus 4C and a bit of wind and snow. Soon there was a film if ice on my cocoa. But it still didn’t feel quite realistic enough so I asked my wife to go out and fetch a bucket of water from the pond and throw it over me. This was it; true realism.
For some reason now she’s a bit niggled, sniffling and the silence is deafening.
How can I convince her that we submariners take our game seriously?

ediko · 11-30-10, 08:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Telemon

Greetings from frozen England.
I need advice. My wife is being unreasonable.
I’m playing SH3/GWX and I’m trying for full realism.
Last night it dawned on me that although ‘in game’ it was Feb ’40 in mid Atlantic with 15mtrs + winds here was I sitting in my warm (60F/20C) corner in the lounge with bikkies and hot cocoa to hand.
This was not right, not real, faked, I was a hypocrite!!
I went upstairs and put on my cold weather gear, sou’wester and rubber boots. Came down and opened wide the patio door. This was more like it. minus 4C and a bit of wind and snow. Soon there was a film if ice on my cocoa. But it still didn’t feel quite realistic enough so I asked my wife to go out and fetch a bucket of water from the pond and throw it over me. This was it; true realism.
For some reason now she’s a bit niggled, sniffling and the silence is deafening.
How can I convince her that we submariners take our game seriously?

Sometimes,just sometimes

....it doesn't feel....

right

May I suggest a divorce mate? You could then turn you're whole house into a big refrigerator and put some red lamps everywhere.

Well, the more simpler option would be to set sail for Africa with you're Kaleun, but surely the less fun one?

frau kaleun · 11-30-10, 08:47 AM

Refuse to allow her in the room while you are playing, citing the longheld belief that a woman on board your boat will anger the sea gods. Unless the sea is already angry, in which case you should demand that she only enter the room if completely naked.

I would also suggest that you refuse to bathe, shave, or change your underwear for the duration of your patrol. I think this will add the kind of hardcore immersion you're looking for and show her just how seriously you take your subsimming.

As an added bonus, by the time you get back to base she will probably have run off with a flashy and much better-smelling fighter pilot. Realism!

Kpt. Lehmann · 11-30-10, 09:00 AM

If none of those suggestions work... you should spank her!

But then again, she may like that!

< SWAPISHHHH!!!! Who's yer Kapitan babeh!?! Who's yer Kapitan??? SWAPISHHH!!! >

< Why YOU ARE my Kapitan! You are my love!!! Smoochie! SMOOCHEH!!! >

Sailor Steve · 11-30-10, 09:38 AM

You might as well follow Frau K's advice, as it's a lost cause anyway. Even if you take good care of yourself sooner or later you'll come home to find the letter:

"Dear Johann..."

Me? Cynical? No way! Depressive and fatalistic, sure...

Herr-Berbunch · 11-30-10, 09:50 AM

It's all in the biccies, you'll need to leave them in alternatively in a warm, damp place, then a cold damp place (removed from wrappings), for three weeks, then enjoy...!

Divorce could make you out to be the loser, so I suggest a word in the *party member's* ear mentioning her comments about how the war would be inevitably lost, and how nice that von Stauffenberg was.

kapuhy · 11-30-10, 10:26 AM

Having already gone so far towards total realism, you may as well go all the way:

http://webarchive.nationalarchives.g...s/how-to-join/

This also comes with the bonus of reversing the effect that your hobby has on your relation with women - for some odd reason they seem to like actual sailors a lot more than bank accountants pretending to be sailors. Don't know why, maybe it's the uniform thing...

Mittelwaechter · 11-30-10, 10:31 AM

BE MORE AGGRESSIVE!

Obviously her chain from the kitchen is too long.

TarJak · 12-01-10, 06:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kpt. Lehmann

If none of those suggestions work... you should spank her!

But then again, she may like that!

< SWAPISHHHH!!!! Who's yer Kapitan babeh!?! Who's yer Kapitan??? SWAPISHHH!!! >

< Why YOU ARE my Kapitan! You are my love!!! Smoochie! SMOOCHEH!!! >

You're in for a shock now you are married.

irish1958 · 12-01-10, 09:40 AM

Telemon
Good news. I have found the perfect Christmas gift for her although it is quite expensive.

A pink ladies nine piece tool set with a cute vinyl case for $9.99 (USD)

I know this is a lot to spend but she deserves it.

As a side effect, she will now leave your tools alone (pun intended).

frau kaleun · 12-01-10, 09:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by irish1958

A pink ladies nine piece tool set with a cute vinyl case for $9.99 (USD)

Is it Stanley? Is it Craftsman? If not, DO NOT WANT!

My daddy taught me to buy Stanley or Craftsman, so I buy Stanley cuz for Craftsman I'd have to go to Sears (yuck). Yes I know there are other quality brands of tools around but I'm not talking major power tools here, just your basic screwdrivers/wrenches/hammers/etc.

What I would suggest is this:

1. Put your u-boat in a box.
2. Make her open that box.
3. ????
4. Profit!

NightCrawler · 11-30-10, 10:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Telemon

Greetings from frozen England.
I need advice. My wife is being unreasonable.
I’m playing SH3/GWX and I’m trying for full realism.
Last night it dawned on me that although ‘in game’ it was Feb ’40 in mid Atlantic with 15mtrs + winds here was I sitting in my warm (60F/20C) corner in the lounge with bikkies and hot cocoa to hand.
This was not right, not real, faked, I was a hypocrite!!
I went upstairs and put on my cold weather gear, sou’wester and rubber boots. Came down and opened wide the patio door. This was more like it. minus 4C and a bit of wind and snow. Soon there was a film if ice on my cocoa. But it still didn’t feel quite realistic enough so I asked my wife to go out and fetch a bucket of water from the pond and throw it over me. This was it; true realism.
For some reason now she’s a bit niggled, sniffling and the silence is deafening.
How can I convince her that we submariners take our game seriously?

When was your last drug-test???? make appointment tomorrow....

J/K....

Arael · 12-01-10, 10:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Telemon

How can I convince her that we submariners take our game seriously?

Well, for starters it ain't February yet. Unless you make sure you start your patrols on the exact date that the patrol starts in-game, you're just a poser. Us REAL diehards even wait years before playing so the day of the week lines up. I've lost quite a few jobs over it, but it does make immersion that much better. I've even set up a small metal shed in my backyard that I set my computer up in. It's dank, humid, freaking cold in the winter, but by god I'm living the experience.

GT182 · 12-02-10, 08:26 PM

Better yet... get her a computer and get her playing SHIII. Then you can toss freezing water on each other, play SHIII. Then you'll have a perfectly good reason to warm up together after you "save" for the night, under those red lights you both installed.

Kinky?

Yes.

frau kaleun · 12-02-10, 08:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GT182

Better yet... get her a computer and get her playing SHIII. Then you can toss freezing water on each other, play SHIII. Then you'll have a perfectly good reason to warm up together after you "save" for the night, under those red lights you both installed.

Kinky?

Yes.

I am intrigued by your ideas, and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

11-30-10, 08:30 AM	#1
Telemon Helmsman Join Date: Nov 2008 Posts: 103 Downloads: 288 Uploads: 0	My wife is being unreasonable. Need advice Greetings from frozen England. I need advice. My wife is being unreasonable. I’m playing SH3/GWX and I’m trying for full realism. Last night it dawned on me that although ‘in game’ it was Feb ’40 in mid Atlantic with 15mtrs + winds here was I sitting in my warm (60F/20C) corner in the lounge with bikkies and hot cocoa to hand. This was not right, not real, faked, I was a hypocrite!! I went upstairs and put on my cold weather gear, sou’wester and rubber boots. Came down and opened wide the patio door. This was more like it. minus 4C and a bit of wind and snow. Soon there was a film if ice on my cocoa. But it still didn’t feel quite realistic enough so I asked my wife to go out and fetch a bucket of water from the pond and throw it over me. This was it; true realism. For some reason now she’s a bit niggled, sniffling and the silence is deafening. How can I convince her that we submariners take our game seriously?

11-30-10, 09:00 AM	#4
Kpt. Lehmann GWX Project Director Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: The Republic of Texas Posts: 6,993 Downloads: 124 Uploads: 0	If none of those suggestions work... you should spank her! But then again, she may like that! < SWAPISHHHH!!!! Who's yer Kapitan babeh!?! Who's yer Kapitan??? SWAPISHHH!!! > < Why YOU ARE my Kapitan! You are my love!!! Smoochie! SMOOCHEH!!! > __________________ www.thegreywolves.com All you need is good men. - Heinrich Lehmann-Willenbrock

11-30-10, 09:38 AM	#5
Sailor Steve Eternal Patrol Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: High in the mountains of Utah Posts: 50,369 Downloads: 745 Uploads: 249	You might as well follow Frau K's advice, as it's a lost cause anyway. Even if you take good care of yourself sooner or later you'll come home to find the letter: "Dear Johann..." Me? Cynical? No way! Depressive and fatalistic, sure... __________________ “Never do anything you can't take back.” —Rocky Russo

11-30-10, 09:50 AM	#6
Herr-Berbunch Kaiser Bill's batman Join Date: May 2010 Location: AN72 Posts: 13,203 Downloads: 76 Uploads: 0	It's all in the biccies, you'll need to leave them in alternatively in a warm, damp place, then a cold damp place (removed from wrappings), for three weeks, then enjoy...! Divorce could make you out to be the loser, so I suggest a word in the party member's ear mentioning her comments about how the war would be inevitably lost, and how nice that von Stauffenberg was. __________________

11-30-10, 10:31 AM	#8
Mittelwaechter The Old Man Join Date: Apr 2007 Posts: 1,304 Downloads: 35 Uploads: 0	BE MORE AGGRESSIVE! Obviously her chain from the kitchen is too long. __________________ 10 happy wolves rear 90 blinded, ensnared sheep. 90 happy sheep banish the wolves. Arrest the 1% - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQ6hg1oNeGE

11-30-10, 08:47 AM	#3
frau kaleun Rear Admiral Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Skyri--oh who are we kidding, I'm probably at Lowe's. Again. Posts: 12,706 Downloads: 168 Uploads: 0	Refuse to allow her in the room while you are playing, citing the longheld belief that a woman on board your boat will anger the sea gods. Unless the sea is already angry, in which case you should demand that she only enter the room if completely naked. I would also suggest that you refuse to bathe, shave, or change your underwear for the duration of your patrol. I think this will add the kind of hardcore immersion you're looking for and show her just how seriously you take your subsimming. As an added bonus, by the time you get back to base she will probably have run off with a flashy and much better-smelling fighter pilot. Realism!

11-30-10, 10:26 AM	#7
kapuhy Grey Wolf Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: Poland Posts: 874 Downloads: 72 Uploads: 3	Having already gone so far towards total realism, you may as well go all the way: http://webarchive.nationalarchives.g...s/how-to-join/ This also comes with the bonus of reversing the effect that your hobby has on your relation with women - for some odd reason they seem to like actual sailors a lot more than bank accountants pretending to be sailors. Don't know why, maybe it's the uniform thing...

12-01-10, 09:40 AM	#10
irish1958 Ocean Warrior Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Carmel, Indiana Posts: 3,250 Downloads: 320 Uploads: 11	Telemon Good news. I have found the perfect Christmas gift for her although it is quite expensive. A pink ladies nine piece tool set with a cute vinyl case for $9.99 (USD) I know this is a lot to spend but she deserves it. As a side effect, she will now leave your tools alone (pun intended). __________________ Irish1958

12-02-10, 08:26 PM	#14
GT182 Ocean Warrior Join Date: May 2005 Location: New Castle of Delaware Posts: 3,231 Downloads: 658 Uploads: 0	Better yet... get her a computer and get her playing SHIII. Then you can toss freezing water on each other, play SHIII. Then you'll have a perfectly good reason to warm up together after you "save" for the night, under those red lights you both installed. Kinky? Yes. __________________ Gary No Borders, No Language, No Culture =s No Country I'm a Deplorable, and proud of it.